With a Twist...

Band-Aid Covers the Bullet Hole..

2011-12-10T20:24:00.000-05:00

Excerpts of dialogues between friends, and friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends...

********************************************************

[Guy talk]

"Friends with benefits should be a legitimate option in India.. Look at us- we're 26 and still are not used to the cruel ways of love. Yahan ke logon ko heartbreak ki aadat ho jaati hai by the time they are in their twenties. That is the healthy way of living life..

"Oh please, do you want to give girls more avenues to use the "let's just be friends" dialogue?! No ways! No friends, only benefits.."

********************************************************

[Girl talk]

"I think sex is over-rated"

"What? How can you say that?"

"No, seriously. I think it's not as big a deal as people make of it"

"I'm sure it's not but you haven't even done it yet- so you never know!"

"Exactly! I haven't even done it yet but I still know I'm going to get bored of it in a few months.."

Turning to friend's fiance : "I feel sorry for you man, really sorry!"

********************************************************

[Mush]

"I think love is like friendship with two shots of espresso topped with two scoops of chocolate syrup!"

********************************************************

[When Harry met Sally..]

"I think we should just be friends for now.."

"Isn't that supposed to be a girls-only dialogue? You cannot infiltrate our territory like that!"

********************************************************

[Ex-files]

"My ex-boyfriend just sent me his wedding invitation card."

"Oh? Sooo...you're going?"

"Going? Seriously?! What do you want me to do - go on stage, congratulate him and his wife, shake his hand, pose for an awkward, corny picture with them, and act all dignified while the whole time I am imagining myself dunking him in sulfuric acid?! NO! I'm not going !!"

********************************************************

[How to Scare Your Mother]

"Do you know there's a vaccine for cervical cancer now? I was speaking to Dr. Bhidaye and he said you are a good candidate for the vaccine. You should take it when you come to India."

"Why am I a good candidate?"

"Coz the vaccine is most effective if you take it when you are unmarried.."

"Unmarried? You mean if you are a virgin right?"

"Huh?!"

"I'm sure marriage has nothing to do with it. I guess you have to be a virgin to be able to take it?"

"Usually, the assumption is that the two are inter-dependent... But the world is changing, so..."

********************************************************

[Arranged Marriage 101]

"Dude, however cool he may be, the fact is that no Indian guy is going to marry an Indian girl who voluntarily has a tattoo!"

"Are you trying to scare me?"

"No, but I'm just telling you to be prepared.. You signed on for a very difficult life.."

********************************************************

[Good girls finish last]

"You are too nice"

"Awww... Thanks ya, that's sweet.."

"No, no. Listen to me- you're too nice"

"And....that's not good?"

"No - guys don't like nice girls! You need to grow some horns!"

********************************************************

[True Story]

"I know this may seem like a rip-off from the Jerry Maguire dialogue but the fact is that you had me at 'Tujhe dekha toh yeh jaana sanam..' Seriously.."

********************************************************

[Teen-ache]

"Yaar, I am in trouble. I try to be mad at him, I want to be mad at him. I get mad at him too- like really, really, really mad- the maddest I can be! But it all goes away when his stupid, smiley face flashes on my cellphone when he calls.."

"You need a new face; or honestly, you need a new life.. Join a dance class or something!"

4 AM Miracle - Not !! :P

2011-12-09T07:33:00.002-05:00

2:42 AM : Wake up - realize I slept off in the middle of a movie again, with the lights on and my visa documents sprawled across the bed under me - Dammit - not again!

2:44 AM : Tinge of guilt - people like me are responsible for the coal reserves depleting.. Ufff...

2:45 AM : Might as well check on the visa dates while I'm awake

2:47 AM : Yayyy !!! Showing 16th - finally! Let's do this..

2:50 AM : Fill out details and hit Next - wait, where did Mumbai go?! Mumbai is not showing in the list of VFS centers !! Where did it go?!

2:51 AM : Re-enter info and now Mumbai showing but only 20th Dec available - what about the earlier dates!? - Kya ho raha hai yaar !!

2:55 AM : I should call the VFS people..

3:00 AM : On line with Mrs. Chattopadhyay on the VFS Hotline - No, I don't know if her name is Mrs. Chattopadhyay, but she sounds Bonglo-bhashi.. :P Oh what the hell.. I like giving nicknames to people.. You know Eddy right- No? That's my name for Edward Cullen - I think Eddy suits him better than Edward in any case.. :P

[Random Thought 1]

Whenever I am speaking to like a customer care person in India, I never know whether to converse in Hindi or English.. I mean, there is a moment when the person says "Hello?" and I am actually thinking - do I reply with a "Hello" in the English-English accent or the Hindi-English accent?! I know they know English, but it's this weird mentality that speaking Hindi might develop a feeling of comradeship with me and hence, maybe help me get my work done sooner! Weird, huh!

3:01 AM : I say "Hello!" with the Hindi-English accent finally.. Mrs. Chattopadhyay answers my questions, but that does not help a lot! Check VFS dates in front of her and now they show 15th open too- but no 16th and 19th! How did that happen?!

3:07 AM : Hang up the phone. Maybe I should write something.. Stare at blank screen for 10 minutes..

[Random Thought 2]

I wish I could concoct up random stories in the middle of the night- get inspiration from the rustling trees and the gushing winds and eerie moonlight and the soulful silences and allow my thoughts to flow miraculously through space and time and then, there's one magical moment where everything comes together and a story is born.. - 4 AM miracle or whatever - but nope, doesn't seem to be happening with me..

3:22 AM : Call up mom instead.. Crib about the stupid online system and how I should have chosen to go to Delhi instead !

[Random Thought 3]

I want to visit Delhi man - and hopefully see uncle-jis in monkey caps at weddings! :P

3:32 AM : Check VFS - Now showing 15th, 19th and 20th, but no 16th - Seriously!

3:35 AM : Stare at screen again - Okay, I'm going to give this a shot - the night is beautiful and I should write..

So a guy in a train - mid 30's, hot (of course!), staring out of the window, looks like the type of person who knows his destination but just for today, does not want to do the expected.. Towns swooshing by - Mellow Valley, Hicksville, Cripple Creek.. Train pulls into Reddick finally and slows down - guy contemplates getting down at the station..

[Random Thought 4]

I love the phrase "Delicious Ambiguity" - read it somewhere.. But has such a nice feel to it.. I should use that in my writing sometime..

3:45 AM : Nope, no thoughts after Reddick.. In any case, this is not a screenplay- I'm getting lost in the details! Forget it, this is not the night..

[Random Thought 5]

Remembered a conversation from a day ago where a friend told me that I was a serious person - Seriously?! I just called Edward, Eddy, - how can I be serious?! Just because I write about tanhayee and life and dreams and love and loss? That is the deep side of me, but I am fun-loving and random and crazy too..

3:52 AM : Need to be at work in 4 hours - going to be a long day - hopefully the bogie workload should level itself out with constant production, but does that make sense if we are storing sets instead? Do I need to add girder manpower to this? Should find out tomorrow..

3:56 AM : Christmas presents! I haven't bought those yet !! So much work to do in five days..

3:55 AM : Hungry, yaar! Feel like white choc mocha.. :(

3:56 AM : Dudeee, sleep !!

3:57 AM : Last try with VFS- anyway the center will close now, so no point trying until tomorrow!

3:58 AM : Nope, no 16th yet! Forget it, worst case- I'll take an appointment for the 22nd, after Gau's shaadi..

4:00 AM : Do I even post this crap I've been typing? Contemplate for a minute..

4:01 AM : Oh, what the hell - this could be my 4 AM non-miracle.. At least it shows I'm not serious all the time..

[Random Thought 5.1]

I am not a serious person! :P

4:07 AM : Edit and format - (I like my articles! :P) - and post!

4:10 AM : Laptop shut down, gudnite!

Main aur meri tanhayee, aksar yeh baatein kartein hain..

2011-12-04T19:42:00.000-05:00

It's the same scene again- the green shrubs lined in a single file for miles on end- each row had a signboard with a name on it - Barbera, Chenin Blanc, Merlot, Muscadet... Almost looked like an assembly line in school. There was that little wooden house in the middle of all that lushness - propped up on stilts with a tiny ladder to reach the doorway. The house looked like it could be blown away by a strong gust of wind, but its appearance defied its strength.. And there she was, standing at the door of the house holding one of those cowbells in her hand- she had just bought it from the gift shop as a souvenir. She was a memories-person and this trip was definitely memory-worthy.. She looked happy, really happy. Maybe it was the wine.. She posed for a picture and then reached her hand out to him to get down. And....

Her eyes opened. This was where it always ended. She knew what happened next- it had been real, after all. But it was as if someone had snipped off the tape from this point on in her mind and so she could never replay the next scenes again.. What was worse was that she was wide awake now. She checked the time on her cellphone- 4:15 AM- oh crap, looks like even dreams follow clockwork.. Why does it always have to be two hours before her alarm rang?! She had to go back to sleep- this routine was starting to frustrate her now..

She closed her eyes shut and tried to clear her mind- pictured all thoughts floating away into nothingness- a very ethereal image- but nope, no sleep. She tried imagining a curtain of the blackest black ever. Didn't work. Counting stars and sheep had never been useful in any case. Finally she gave up trying- just kept her eyes shut in the hope that fatigue will take over at some point. It was at this point that she heard his voice -

"Ten nights in a row and you still haven't learned eh.. Same story all the time.", he said
"Why are you here, yet again?! I thought I had made it clear that I don't want you in my life anymore.", she replied, opening her eyes finally. She knew now, that sleep was not going to return.
"If only it worked that way, my dear. You forgot to teach me obedience when I was little. So now, I come and go as I please. You should know that..", he replied wryly. His voice was careless, dry, pompous to an extent- he knew he was in control.
"Okay, have it your way then. I'm awake. What do you want?", she asked, resigning to him finally.
"That has never been the question. You know I wouldn't come if you didn't want me to. So, the real question is- what do you want?!"
"For the hundredth time- If I knew, I'd do something about it, right. I seriously don't know !!"
"Think about it, Aaliya. Really think.. I'll give you some time while I take a short nap.."
"Seriously?! Seriously?! You want me to think while you nap? Dude, I work ten to eleven hours everyday, and am dead tired and still I get no more than five hours of sleep every night because you come and disturb me at the break of dawn; and you want me to sit and think while you nap?! I would punch you so hard if you were real...". She was angry now, really angry.
"Ahhh stop yelling, woman! It's such a beautiful night. Are you thinking of the past again?"
"No! I'm not. And that is the problem- the past is such a blur- I cannot remember anything even if I want to. Where did all those memories go?"
"Ahhh.. Well, blurs can be artistic. Or alcoholic too, actually. Did you drink too much? Maybe that explains the vineyards...". He was mocking her, and was not even ashamed of it.
"No, I don't drink that much and you know it. And yes, I remember the vineyards, but even that is a half-baked memory. The rest of it has just dissipated mysteriously. There are scenes and snippets here and there- tiny 20 second clips. A few months ago, these were a full-blown movie."
"But that is a good thing, right. That movie made you sad every time you saw it. It's going away. That is what is supposed to happen. Why do you want to hold on?"
"I don't. I don't want to hold on. But at the same time, I did not expect them to just go away. Those memories, those people were a part of the fabric of my life at one point. How can they just not be there all of a sudden?"
"The people haven't stayed, so why do you expect the memories to?"
"No, it's not that. I knew they would go away after a while. It's just that I always thought that reminiscing about those days would at least evoke some emotion in me- sadness, remorse, disappointment- something. But now?! It's just nothingness- isn't that weird? It's almost as if moving on was so easy.."
"Okay, now it's my turn to say it- seriously !! I've been listening to you whine about wanting to let go for nearly a year now. You moved across the country because you thought that would make you move on.. And now that it has happened, you say it was too easy?! I think in some perverted way, you like the sadness.."
"Maybe we do- human nature. I think being dark and twisty feels more natural than bright and shiny. It's comfortable. It helps you justify eating the whole tub of ice-cream or laying in bed watching soppy movies the whole day. There are too many expectations from optimistic people! It's way too much pressure.."
"And the Gods wonder why the human civilization is doomed! You act like you have all these lives to live and your bones cannot take the burden anymore... Wake up and smell the coffee !!"
"Look- I know the speech- I am young, I have a brilliant job, I am financially independent, I have friends in my life, and interests that keep me happy.. On the face of it, there is nothing to complain about. I know I'm supposed to be happy.. But still, the picture is not complete..."
"The picture, again! My artist friend, the picture is not complete because you have decided that it is not. You draw your own painting, you decide its boundaries, you decide what you want in it, you decide the colors, you decide the theme.. It's you, not anyone else. Ever remember the importance of white space in your art class? Too many things at one time and what you get is a mess- nothing stands out, or everything stands out. Besides, life is not one picture, it is an exhibition of all your creations- however shoddy they may be. And even an exhibition takes time to build- you do it one frame at a time.You cannot do it all, and you cannot have it all."
"Easier said than done.. It's like I'm driving on a freeway at a speed of eighty-five miles per hour without a GPS- and you know how terrible my sense of direction is! What if I missed my exit? What if I missed on the wonderful experiences that could have been mine, had I just slowed down or just looked at a map beforehand?"
"Fine- then take a damn exit, just for the sake of it- but before you do, be forewarned that the interesting story you are looking for might just turn out to be an interminable nightmare - are you ready for that? And enough with the metaphors, already! You're confusing me, now!"
"All I'm saying is- how do I know that I'm choosing the right path.. It's just frustrating thinking about all that could have been..."
"I hate to break it to you, Aaliya, but if you wanted life to be simple, then you should have signed under the "Bugs" column when God was filling out the Choices form. And even they don't have it easy nowadays.."
"...and wait, people- they're complicated! They love to hurt you. One day, they are your best friends, they make you part of their life, they love you and care for you and make you get used to them. And the next minute, you're out- replaced by work or other friends or lovers.. Whatever happened to commitment?"
"You need to breathe... And stop analyzing. What could have been- no such thing. If it didn't happen, then it could never have been. And couldn't have been because it wasn't good for you. And people- for every person who left, there are two who stayed and unfortunately, you only know to focus on the wrong ones.."
"So, what do I do? Be thankful for the life I have, learn to count my blessings, think about the journey and not the destination, appreciate the stars and the roses along the way...?!"
"Nothing- you just try to sleep- five hours a day is not enough.. When you wake up, it is another day. It may not be a new start, but at least it would be a new opportunity to make things right again.."
"I should sleep.. These thoughts, they just don't go away.. But I should sleep.. Are you going to come back again tomorrow?". There was anticipation in her voice- but whether good or bad, no one could tell.
He smiled and said, "Only if you want me to, Aaliya. I'll come only if you want me to, remember?"

Breaking Dawn

2011-11-24T20:52:00.001-05:00

Disclaimer: NO, this post has nothing to do with the Twilight movie- I saw it with my friends to make them happy and I think it is the most ridiculous movies of all time- two hours of unadulterated torture!

Real post begins now ---->

Time: 5:50 AM- Day 1 of Thanksgiving Break
You think it's ridiculous to be awake at this unearthly hour, especially when it's a break- yes, I do too. But this is one in a series of awkward nights I have been having since the past week..
Tonight I got up with multiple dreams- one about some material deliveries being screwed up on the production floor at work, one about saying good-bye to a friend who was leaving Davis for good and one about Thanksgiving two years ago amidst snow and Fall-colored maple leaves!
I left the light in my room on again - goodness, I'm dreading my PG&E bill this month!
I spent $300 on this IKEA bed - why can't I sleep !!

Anyway, no work today, so I get up, make myself a cup of white choc mocha and open my laptop.. Email checked, Facebook checked, blog updates by friends checked, NPR news checked.. Apparently, Sharad Pawar was slapped today by a Sikh guy today at some function in Delhi- it's all over the news and Facebook and the guy is being applauded by one and all. Agreed that someone like Mr. Pawar completely deserves being treated like this- he is one of the most corrupt officials the Indian government has ever seen. But is slapping him in public going to make him control the rising prices of agricultural produce in India? No. Is he going to feel guilty and confess all his crimes to the police? Definitely not. Harvinder Singh vented out his frustration, but the result of that is a Maharashtra bandh tomorrow- go figure! It, infact, takes all the attention away from the real issues that need to be tackled and gives these politicians reason to make a mountain out of a molehill..

Talking of mountains, this Kolaveri Di song is turning out to be quite a rage in the country- I'm amazed by the amount of jokes and caricatures that people have come up with already. To be honest, it is quite an addictive song- I can totally imagine it being a hit on drunken night-outs with college friends. The Indian audience is so unpredictable- on one day, the top favorite is a song with lyrics as beautiful as- "jo bhi main, kehna chahoon, barbaad kare alfaaz mere" and the next week, "white-u skin girl-u girl-u, girl-u heart-u black-u" is rocking the charts.. Click this link for a hilarious Kolaveri 101 run-down.. While we're on music, I have to say- I absolutely love Mohit Chauhan- I think he has the most soulful and romantic voices I've ever heard!

It's weird how our work influences all other aspects of our life too. I remember, when I was doing an internship with Price Chopper (it's a grocery store in upstate NY, like a fancier Walmart), I always called fruits and vegetables "produce" because that's how they were classified in the warehouse. I'm a scheduler now and I just realized that every time anyone says one week, I instantly think 5 days because that's what we use in our day-to-day calculations.. It's not a bad thing, of course.. I love the fact that some part of my brain is always thinking about projects at work and how to handle them etc.

The seasons are changing here so fast! There was hardly a Fall and it's Winter already. It is lightly raining outside and there are leaves all over the road- in shades of green, red and yellow- they look so beautiful! I love the holidays and the festivities associated with them- there are times when I don't like them as much, but I still love them for the most part. Diwali, Christmas and Thanksgiving are my favorites and I cannot even choose which one I like better! Festivals to me are about lights, gifts, good food, friends and family, traditions and togetherness.

I remember, last year, this time, I was in RIT preparing for my thesis defense! Time really flies! Yesterday, two of my friends "celebrated" their pre-wedding anniversary which means that they are getting married on this day, next year! On that note, two of my best friends would be married by this time next month! Time is flying at the speed of light !! What would I be doing this time next year?!

I saw this image one day and it really formed an impression on my mind. I think I think too much! :P I should stop thinking and start doing. These intermittent sleepless nights have forced me to really outline the things I am doing wrong in life and what I need to change. I think I have come up with a few contenders and have taken up two projects which I hope will help me better the current situation. Let's see how they go..

Okay, so I know I just said I'm not going to think too much anymore- but one last thought- I was talking to a friend about loneliness the other day- this girl has the most amazing lifestyle ever- a great job that she loves, a very active social life, the opportunity to pursue her passions, friends, interests that keep her motivated, financial stability- nothing terribly wrong on the face of it- and still she told me that she leads a very lonely life. Is it possible to have people around you who care about you and still feel lonely? If loneliness is a state of mind, then it probably never goes away, regardless of where you are. People compare their lives in India and the US and say that the lifestyle in the US is very lonely. But if you're staying away from your family in India, isn't that the same as living 3000 miles away, at least on a day-to-day basis? Yes, you'd be in the same time and geographical zone which does make communication a lot easier, but maybe it would still be a lonely existence...

Ohh I just realized today is Thanksgiving- maybe I should sign-off with a few things I am thankful for, in the spirit of the season..

For one, I am thankful for the people in my life currently- believe me, I know what being lonely is, and it is not fun. And I have come a long way from that. So yes, as I always say, people matter and I am thankful for the ones in my life.
I am thankful for great bosses- no, my boss doesn't know I blog, but again, I have had my share of bad bosses and so I am genuinely thankful for being blessed with a brilliant one this time around!
I am thankful for change, when it is needed. And I am thankful for things staying the same when we seek comfort in the familiar.
And I am thankful for Mohit Chauhan.. :):)

Happy Thanksgiving everyone! :)

Growing up...

2011-11-24T11:54:00.000-05:00

Like all mothers of the world, my mom has always been extremely protective about me, maybe a touch more than most moms actually.. Of course, when I was a teenager, I called it being over-bearing and interfering but growing up makes you realize that it was actually just her motherly need to shield me from all the bad things in the world. I do the same with my sister sometimes- she is only 4 years younger to me but every now and then, I feel the need to warn her about the dangers in the world. I even use the same dialogue my mom used on me- "learn from me, don't repeat the mistakes I made!" My retort to that always was the classic- "let me do what I want; let me make my own mistakes; how will I grow if I don't learn things the hard way?!" Very easy to say- sounds all brave and fearless, but is not so easy to follow, or so I have learned over time! My sister is a lot more mature than me though- she did actually manage to learn from my mistakes and made sure she did not repeat a lot of the ones I made, even though tempted otherwise. See, this is why you should always be the younger one! :P

Anyway, I digress.. So one of the things my mom never liked was how easily I trusted people. I don't mean strangers on the bus or anything, but more like how I could do anything for my friends and people I was close to. She did not like me having sleepovers with my friends or hanging out with them till late at night- 10 PM was my curfew time. She did not like it when I spoke to them on the phone for too long because she wanted me to study instead! She also did not like it when I gave up study-time or family-time to help them out or be with them sometimes. Her point in all this was that I go overboard and out of my way to help a friend and she wanted me to hold back on that because not all people reciprocate with the same intensity, which only ends up hurting me.. This impending hurt is what she wanted to save me from.. The fact that a lot of the stupid astrologers she consulted in those years told her the same thing about my over-trusting nature only made matters worse... :P

I was thinking about friendships the other day and the people who have been a part of my life ever since I really knew what it means to have a meaningful connection with a person. I often feel like God or whoever the guiding force is in this universe, is running a giant lab experiment with people in the world. Just like those redox reactions we learned about in school chemistry. We each form different kinds of bonds with different people depending on our so-called "electron configurations".. Each reaction can either increase or decrease our oxidation number but stability is reached only when a minimum energy bond is formed. Can we determine if that will happen with an X person, though? Not really.. Situations change, people change, we change, chemistries change; some people get lucky, others not so much; some people move on, others remain where they were.. In a situation that is so transient, how do we determine what is too soon and too close? And since we are always searching for reasons and answers, how do we justify the people who did come into our lives but left halfway? If they weren't planning on staying for the journey, then why did they make us change our destination?

Given all the above points, was my mom right?
Have I made a fool of myself by trusting the wrong people at times? Maybe.
Have I learned anything from those mistakes? The hope is that I have.
Will I repeat the same mistakes again? Oh hell, ya! :P
So, what do I do? She isn't here to save me from the hurt each time...
I guess I go back to what I told her ten years ago - "let me do what I want; let me make my own mistakes; how will I grow if I don't learn things the hard way"

I guess I'm not a big fan of growing up.....

2011-11-04T18:24:00.002-04:00

Thank you AOL / ICQ for coming up with instant messenger services in the 1900's and then Google for integrating it with their email service !!!

I officially love gtalk - because it can connect people who are 7374 miles apart and have not spoken to each other for over 13 days and who need to speak to each other !!! :):)

Stupid post, but this has been a crazy week and I'm happy it's ending and I'm grateful for a few special people in my life... :) And gtalk just helped me reconnect with them.. :)

New beginnings, old endings..

2011-11-03T02:58:00.001-04:00

People tend to get really romantic about the beginning of new things- may be a new job, a new relationship, a new life, new people- whatever the case may be- starting with a clean slate seems to have some kind of charm to it. You think of how things would be different this time. You make lists of all the things you would work towards changing in yourself. A world of possibilities lay in front of you and you would work towards grabbing them with open arms and make the most of it - your life would change forever!

Reality check though- no matter how new life and the circumstances may be, you are still the same you- after a point, how much can you change yourself? Yes, you start with renewed enthusiasm and motivation, which is great! But very soon, the energy fades away and you tend to revert back to your old ways. Your faults still remain the same, your fears still remain the same, your goof-ups still remain the same. They only get temporarily subdued by the magic of a new beginning..

Like for example, suppose you are an inherently positive person who has a terrible accident and becomes a paraplegic- this may set you back initially, you will hate your life and curse your destiny. But once the emotions settle, the optimism and energy to take life by its horns and fight back does return because that's who you are. On the other hand, what if you are an inherently negative person and win a million dollar lottery? You would be ecstatic initially, love your life and thank your stars but once the wave of happiness subsides, you go back to complaining about the corruption, traffic, pollution and your neighbor's dog! The inner you really never changes.. Right?

We humans are funny- we keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again and never really learn to change. And then we wonder why life didn't turn out any differently !! The unfortunate truth of the matter is- we are always given the right opportunities, but we never learn how to use them correctly.. Because screwing up something that is perfect is what comes naturally to us..

I...

2011-10-29T20:42:00.001-04:00

...want to feel pure adrenaline!
...want to jump off a plane at 15,000 feet and experience free falling to the earth!
...want to see a shooting star!
...want to really, really, really laugh!
...want to really, really, really cry!
...want to tell someone my crazy life ambitions!
...want to fulfill one of my crazy life ambitions!
..want to find something that I love so much, it even keeps me awake at night! Somehow Anu's words have never stop ringing in my mind for seven years now!
...want to go back to kick-boxing!
...want to take a wrong turn somewhere and discover a completely new, untouched, pristine land!
...want to get back my 4 AM friend!
...want to stop putting on a brave and smiley face all the time! I remember this famous line in a musical- flowers wilt, apples rot, thieves get rich and saints get shot and God don't answer all our prayers a lot.. :P Hell, that's true and I know life goes on, but that doesn't mean I cannot sulk about it! :P
...want to use a lot of swear words.. :P I know that's not me, but I still want to do it.. :P
...want life to imitate a Hindi film!
...want to believe that keeping the faith works..
..want to learn how to live alone- 3 years with roommates and I've seriously forgotten how to enjoy my own company!
...want to read a book in one entire sitting!
...want to live a day without a cellphone!
...want to break eggs or throw oranges or yell real loud or punch someone real hard!
...want to go to London!
...want to feel the goosebumps on my skin just before a performance on stage! It's been over a year!
...want to lie down under the sky and watch the stars (maybe I'll do that tonight.. :))
...want to work on a lathe or milling machine!
...want to go into a bubble- nothing else exists!
...want to feel total control!
...want to work super-hard!
...want to see a miracle happen!
...want to eat fondue!
...want to land up at the airport and take a flight to a random place!
...want someone to believe in me!
...want a pet cat!
...want to make plans!
...want to feel inspired!
...
...
...
...

The Bench

2011-10-20T21:40:00.004-04:00

Blame fiction writers and film-makers for romanticizing gardens so much. He who plants a garden, plants happiness, they say. Great love is born here, even greater loves end here. Legend has it that Newton was sitting in a garden when he was hit by that famed apple and the story of gravity was born. No one even considers the fact the Newton was working on the theory of terrestrial gravity for nearly two decades- what is important is that it all came together during that afternoon walk in the garden full of apple trees. The Book of Genesis credits the Garden of Eden as the place where the whole of the human race initiated. People build gardens as dedications for their loved ones. You know my favorite garden scene in a movie? It's one of those last scenes in (500) days of Summer, where Summer meets Tom for the first time after she gets married. That dialogue still rings in my head - "You weren't wrong, Tom. You were just wrong about me."

Me? Oh, I'm a bench- the tiny, inconsequential element that no garden is complete without and yet, is always forgotten. There are no love ballads written about me. No bench is ever used as a metaphor for life, love and happiness. I'm sure there were no benches in the Garden of Eden, but let's go back to the Newton story- what if Issac was sitting under another bench and the apple had never fallen on his head? He still would have figured out the laws of Nature, of course, only maybe a decade later.

Don't get me wrong, I'm usually not the jealous, attention-seeking type. I agree that I per se, have no aesthetic appeal whatsoever. People come to the garden for the trees and the flowers and butterflies and ponds and the like- I am only a functional element placed for the sake of convenience, a mere prop. There isn't a lot you can do with me too- I come in two types, wood and metal. There could be a simple or more ornate version of me- but that's about it. But would people spend as much time in a garden if there were no bench? Probably not. Most of them don't like to get their clothes dirty, so they wouldn't sit on the grass, although I agree that is more romantic than a bench. I am the one who hears all the stories, sees the love and the pain and the fear and the passion. I feel for these people. I know these people......

"I'm sorry, Aaliya.", he said.
"This is all I wanted. For seven years. All I wanted was a heartfelt sorry. So, I should say thank-you I guess", she replied, pensive look in her eyes.
"I guess I was a kid back then. Naive and stupid. I should have stayed."
"You shouldn't have stayed, you should have fought. There is a difference. And you should have been honest with me. I deserved that much."
"I know. But why didn't you fight longer then, Al. You knew how messed up my mind was then."
"You think we would have lasted any longer? A year more, maybe. But a lifetime? Nahh.. We are structured very differently, Nits. You need a punching bag and a Gibraltar. Someone who'll be there when you think the whole world is against you. But you don't know how to be that for someone else."
"That's not true."
"It is. And you know it. Anyway, that is not of any consequence anymore. We have both moved on far bigger and better places. This day is just an ending our story should have gotten years ago."
"Are you happy?"
"Yes. More than I can ever imagine. Whatever happened, did happen for the best."
"I know. And I'm happy for us"
"Bye, Nits. Have a good life."
"Bye, Aaliya. I'm sorry again."

She smiles. They get up and leave. They were my favorite couple. And I remember feeling the pangs of helplessness when they ended things right at this spot seven years ago, almost to the day. That was the day I wished I had arms that could move. So that I could give one thwack to Nits and ask him to stay. So that I could give a bear hug to Aaliya when he left.

I am only a bench- ornate and metal, painted black. I have no wordly wisdom and no greater purpose. But there's one quote from Shantaram that sums up life as I know it.

"Sometimes we love with nothing more than hope. Sometimes we cry with everything except tears. In the end that's all there is. Love & its duty, sorrow & its truth. In the end that's all we have - to hold on tight until the dawn"

Shantaram was her favorite book. Aaliya always read this out to Nits. Unfortunately, he never really got it.

Can't Fight Time..

2011-10-07T16:30:00.000-04:00

दिलों में तुम अपनी बेताबियाँ लेके चल रहे हो तो जिंदा हो तुम

नज़र में ख्वाबों की बिजलियाँ लेके चल रहे हो तो जिंदा हो तुम

बेताबी is good- it just means that you stand to lose something. It means that something is important enough that its absence affects you in some way. Having said that, I think as you grow older, you also realize that patience is seriously a virtue- there is a right place and a right time for things to happen and sometimes, you need to just trust that the process will fall in place when it has to. Unfortunately, I think I can be a real kid when it comes to this- I have always hated the dark. I like to know where things stand. In terms of my own life, I like to map out my career and life goals- at least make a tentative plan of action for how things should be. In terms of others, my actions more than compensate for my lack in being articulate about my thoughts and feelings. If I trust you and like you and make you a part of my inner circle, then you will know it through my actions- simple and straightforward. I hate those devious games people play in order to control someone’s mind and feelings. And I hate people who can never take a stand- especially when their decisions are interlinked to someone else. I guess it is this love for clarity and organization that helps me like my job as a project scheduler. But being in scheduling also teaches you that almost nothing is ever supposed to go as per plan.. :P The ultimate purpose of curveballs is to show up when you least expect them so that you can invest time and energy in figuring out how to dodge them. Things can never be as clear as black and white. Goals need time to pan out, people need time to take decisions- and the smart person knows how to accept that as a fact.

The bigger the investment, the better the returns. The little caveat in this philosophy, though, is- how does one know what is worth giving that time to? Scientists invest years in a particular project hoping against hope that their time and effort will not go in vain. People devote half their lifetimes to a relationship because they want it last till eternity. Till death do us part and all that.. But some times, things just don’t work out. People break up. Experiments fail. But the circle of life dictates that you take these setbacks in your stride, pick up the pieces and restart all over again. This is fine too- some times a clean slate is all you need. But starting from the bottom of the ladder also means that you need a lot more patience and perseverance to climb to where you were before and go beyond that. And god forbid, you reach the open mouth of a snake again! This game can get really frustrating!

The poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling is one of my all time favorites. There was a time I used to read this out to myself nearly every day. This is my favorite verse –

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools..

Life is full of so many layers- you figure out how to unravel one of them and before you know it, another has taken it’s place. I’m not complaining- the fun is in fitting together the pieces of this puzzle.. But sometimes, just on one of those days, you wish someone would just show you how the final picture is supposed to look like! :)

P.S. 1. - Blogging in the middle of the work day?! - Not good! But it's Friday! :)
P.S. 2. - Typing out that initial verse in Hindi was super-fun!

Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens..

2011-10-04T03:06:00.000-04:00

Hmmm so I've had enough of the philosophical posts.. One thing I've come to realize is that the mind is very complex- I think it likes to complicate even the simplest of equations.. And no matter how hard you try, the only way to untangle some knots is to just let them be- sometimes the answer just pops back at you after a while.. So, wanting to write something cheerful and simple.. I remember this game a friend and I used to play whenever any of us felt a little low.. We'd just close our eyes, clear our minds completely, set the timer to five minutes and then start listing out the things that make us feel happy- no thought, no deliberation and no logic.. She isn't with me right now, but I'm still going to play this game by myself..

So here goes- cannot close my eyes and type but still...clearing my mind...setting the timer to five minutes.. Its 11:58 PM..

My cat back home in Pune
Long conversations with close friends
When Monday morning meetings get canceled..
Pehli baarish
Purple
Whatsapp messages that make you smile in the middle of a hard day
When a new cooking experiment turns out really well
New York City
Fall colors in the east coast
An idea or project that captivates you so much that it even keeps you awake at night
Not having to always spell out every feeling
Lighthouses
Kesar pista kulfi
Being on a creative high
Love
Setting up an apartment
Old photographs
Sunday morning coffee
Planning surprises
Getting surprises... :)
Chats on the balcony
Grey's Anatomy quotes that just fit the mood of the day
Dance
Being able to click a really good portrait
Compliments
Reading archived emails from days gone by
Holding hands
Refrigerator magnets
Light snow that floats around like tiny wasps of cotton
Uplifting music
Random smiles
That feeling in your gut that tells you something is right
Waterfalls
Vanilla milkshake
Spanish

Alrighty, time's up, mind is happy and it's time to sleep.. Shubh ratri everyone.. :)

Stromboli

2011-10-02T17:49:00.000-04:00

Disclaimer: This post is named Stromboli because it's lunch time and I'm hungry and I am craving Stromboli.. This post is not even remotely related to food. This post is not about anything actually. I've just been having a very confused past few days and I'm trying to string my thoughts together because I've always been better at writing than speaking.. Having said that, my thoughts are so tangled right now that I don't think even writing them down point-wise is really going to help me- but it's my blog, so what the hell- I'm still going to give it a shot.. I apologize in advance for the random post- something more concrete in a few days- I promise.. :)

[Thought 1]

Have you ever felt like there is so much to do in life and so little time? Like not in terms of long-term, well-defined goals per se, but just things you want to do. I read blogs of random people at times, and some of them are very open about what their dreams are- some want to learn French, some want to reach the base camp of the Himalayas, some want to sky-dive or write a book or open a start-up venture.. I have such goals too, but it's just that I'm not very vocal about them. But one thing I've always wondered is- it's very easy, no let's rephrase that- it's easier to write or define things you want to accomplish at certain stages of your life. But very few actually follow them through and reach a stage where they can successfully strike them off their list. What distinguishes these people from the rest, who just make a list and store it in a keepsake box and then open it a few years down the line and lament about how time has flown by..? Is it mere talent? Nah, can't be that simple- Talent is useful in terms of achieving your full-blown life goals in your profession or family or social life. But in most cases, these goals take up so much of your time and energy that the other less-significant, personal, yet important items get sidetracked. I think most of it is about motivation- the will to practice and persist until you succeed. But then again, motivation can be internal or external- for some people, their inner fire is so strong that no amount of resistance can stop them. Others need people to push them. Like in the case of writing- as G correctly pointed out- it's easier to write when you have interesting people around you to talk with because a lot of these conversations actually generate ideas.. Again, with internal motivation- it stems from how the society around you has been- have you always been pushed to give everything a shot without fearing failure or have you always been asked to test the waters before jumping? In the case of external motivation, it's all about being at the right place at the right time.. I can go on about this, but the idea is that a full-blown FMEA can be done on what distinguishes the achievers from the regulars. But in all it's veracity (;)), it is also nearly impossible to develop a set model for these kind of habitual achievers. This whole concept scares me because of the uncertainty associated with it. How many items am I going to be able to cross off my list? What if the mundane concerns of day-to-day life completely take over these crazy ambitions?

[Thought 2]

Choices. Since the time philosophy was invented, pseudo-smart and consciously verbose people have professed about how the choices we make define the path of our lives. The thing about choices is that sometimes the right thing to do can be very different from what you want to do. Like you have two paths to choose from- A and B. A is the path of least resistance- logical, safe, more than 40% chance of success, possibility of pleasing more than 60% people. Those are good odds. But A is just blah- it's not what you want from your life, it doesn't excite you, you know that a small part of your brain would probably regret it always. B on the other hand is how you have always wanted it to be- you know that if this works, then it's a jackpot- but there is no way of knowing if it will work or not. And sometimes, time is not on your side. What do you do? Still give B a shot? Or go with A and then try to convince yourself to find the excitement and inspiration in it? Maybe things take a turn and you realize eventually that A was the right thing to do after all. But it's a gamble.. Okay, I'm not battling with such dramatic issues in life, but every decision you take is a miniature version of this problem- A or B, safe or risky, normal or exciting? Stupid philosophers wasted time in writing those crappy quotes- thoda time solution ko define karne mein invest karte toh the world would be an easier place.. :P

[Thought 3]

So I was thinking about the weirdest quotes from Hindi movies that I remember and somehow the following one from Maine Pyaar Kiya always is the first one to pop up- This was after Mohnish Behl sees Salman Khan and Bhagyashree in his party together- so imagine the scene- All three are drenched in rain (can't remember why it was raining, actually maybe they're just sweating..), Mohnish is angry- I think he was trying to lootofy the izzat of Bhagyashree and of course, Sallu bhai is the knight in shining armor.. So woman is crying in a corner, hero is wild with fury and villain is insulted but also glad to have proven a point.. The dialogue goes- "Prem, ek ladka aur ladki kabhi dost nahi ban sakte. Yeh toh parda hai parda.. Kapkapati raaton mein dhadakte hue dilon ki tadapti hui aag ko bujhane ka...chupaane ka..

Waah waah- kya dialogue hai! Don't ask me why I remember it so well though- I wish I knew! :P

Another dialogue that is my all time favorite is from Kal Ho Na Ho- "Hasna hai toh Rohit, rona hai toh Rohit, magar pyaar karna hai toh kisi aur se.. It's not going to work anymore, Naina.." Hmmm the plight of being stuck in the "friend" zone... :P

[Thought 4]

Have you ever met a person who has challenged you more than anyone ever has? So you meet them and get to know them and every time, there is a new facet to their personality that amazes you and frustrates you at the same time- you wish you could be like them, but you also know that you could never be like them.. I can't spell out the feeling correctly, but I hope you get the point.. I have always been very good at understanding people but characters like these are so difficult to sort out..

[Thought 5]

I really feel like doing something impulsive. It's been so long since I've just done something in the moment, just because I felt like it !! :( Maybe I should ask G to get that liquid nitrogen from his lab.. :P

[Thought 6]

Sometimes I wish I could behave or act like a typical girl, just for a few hours- I don't know exactly what that means, but that's why it's a random thought.. :P

I don't exactly feel sorted right now, but can I please have some Stromboli?

Children

2011-09-27T17:02:00.001-04:00

Random website-hopping brought me to this beautiful poem by Kahlil Gibran- On Children.

If you have kids, this is one of those poems you should have framed by your bedside and read out loud every night, almost like a prayer.. I know that's one thing I would do for sure..

Your children are not your children.
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.
They come through you but not from you,
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.

You may give them your love but not your thoughts,
For they have their own thoughts.
You may house their bodies but not their souls,
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow,
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.
You may strive to be like them,
but seek not to make them like you.
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.

You are the bows from which your children
as living arrows are sent forth.
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite,
and He bends you with His might
that His arrows may go swift and far.
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;
For even as He loves the arrow that flies,
so He loves also the bow that is stable.

Note to all parents: After a certain age, let your children be ! They are smart enough to figure their way out..

Fiction piece from the yesteryears..

2011-09-25T04:34:00.003-04:00

Time: One of those unusual quiet Saturdays, 1:35 AM

State of Mind: Melancholic

Song on iPod: Tanha Dil Tanha Safar (maybe that explains the mood.. :P)

I am browsing through my hard disk and reading some of the articles I've written in the past so many years- most of them have found their way to this blog, but there are some things which I never got around to posting coz they were too amateurish or silly.. Opened this little fictional piece I wrote many years ago- which is kind of inspired from a true life incident (as is all fiction).. Just brought a smile to my face because it's ending is the exact opposite of what I wrote about in my previous post..

Reproducing it here, in its unedited and unabridged form, four years after writing it.. :)

**********************************************************************************

Remember how we used to have categories of friends when we were younger- general friends, good friends, best friends, bestestest friends.. She wanted to know which category she belonged to.

"Well, if it bothers you so much, just ASK him.. Not a big deal. It’s not like you’re his pesky girlfriend", her mind told her.

True. But asking a question as silly as "So....where do I stand in your life?" would make her a "typical" female, a tag she had so consciously stayed away from.

But everything was so unsettling. She wanted to know. Maybe she was a typical.

"Penny for your thoughts!", he said, as he sat beside her on the couch, interrupting her thoughts.

"Hey! Done with your phone call?"

"Yeah, was a friend from work. So....who you thinking about?", he asked, that familiar twinkle in his eyes.

"Huh...no one re. Just watching some TV"

"The History Channel? Wow...you take TV - watching seriously mate !"

With that, they both burst out laughing, as she flipped through the channels. A few minutes passed by in silence- the comfortable kind, not awkward at all..

"Hey, ummmm....you wanna go for a walk or something? If you're not too tired with all the traveling and jet lag, that is.", he asked finally.

She looked at him, and suddenly everything was so clear. Her mind raced back to 1998- this was exactly how it had started. This very question, that walk, had marked their transition from “general” friends to “bestestest” friends.

Of course, nothing had changed.. This time, geographical boundaries and education had come in the way. Soon, there'd be girlfriends and boyfriends, jobs, marriage, kids; but nothing; absolutely nothing could change what they had. Ever. Did she really need to define it? No. Because some things are best left unsaid....

"What's funny? Why are you smiling?", he asked, as he walked towards the door.

"Nothing. I'll just grab a pullover; I think its kinda cold in your London...."

**********************************************************************************

Sometimes Calvin and Hobbes just get you.. :)

Time: 1:58 AM

State of Mind: Still Melancholic

Song on iPod: Haule haule ho jayega pyaar..

Last thought before I crash into bed: I love Taani partner!

Why does everyone always wait till 3 ?

2011-09-17T20:09:00.001-04:00

Sometimes the Youtube suggested videos come up with real gems- like this short film that popped up after a Grey's Anatomy song (go figure!)...

If you think about it- the story is very standard- a guy with a list of things to do before graduation, his girl - friend (the dash that makes all the difference!) who he also has a crush on, and how he gathers up the courage to tell her his feelings in the end..

All of us have those lists of things we want to accomplish before graduation or before we turn 25 or 30 or 50, whichever bracket you fall into..
All of us know the feeling of being secretly crazy about someone but not knowing how to say it because you don't want to "ruin the friendship.."
And hopefully some of us have gathered up the courage to tell them how we felt in the hope of leaving nothing unsaid..

In matters of the heart, more than ever, timing is everything. One missed chance, one wrong move, or a little too much alcohol (;)) can break your shot at the possibility of a great love. The funny thing though, is that you never really know at that point, if it was a good or bad thing. What seems like a lost cause then, could probably be the pathway to something even bigger and better in your future. The dots connect backwards- true. But at the same time, you can connect the dots only if you create them in the first place. Unless you take your chances, how will you know what you could get? Why does everyone always wait till 3? The right moment is now, not when the moon is in its waning crescent phase and stars are forming a heart shape in the sky.. :P

My second take-home message is this- I sincerely hope that none of you have to experience lost love, because no doubt, it is one of the hardest things you ever have to go through. But if it does come your way- then never go down without a fight. If you wallow in self-pity, then it's like giving the other person the remote control of your life. And that is completely unacceptable. Cry if you want to. But only for fifteen minutes. Love is not a battlefield, but bouncing back is.

(This post goes out to Aly- This is all I want you to remember, girl..)

No Title.

2011-09-13T14:02:00.001-04:00

Yet another quote from Grey's Anatomy hits the nail on the head today..

"...And is it worth it—being responsible? Because if you take your vitamins and pay your taxes and never cut the line, the universe still gives you people to love and then lets them slip through your fingers like water, and then what have you got? Vitamins and nothing..."

Responsibility sucks. I never took my vitamins. I've made mistakes. But I've alwayd learned from them.
I never said I was perfect.
People matter. Love matters.
Life is weird.

Humans like to impose and demonstrate their power on other living beings like animals by killing them for food, pleasure or revenge. Basically they like controlling and manipulating others' lives. Survival of the fittest. I say, that is unfair. Which is why I'm vegetarian.

Then, God or whatever you consider above all of us, shows us our place by doing the exact same thing to us. That is unfair too. But I said I was vegetarian. Shouldn't that account for something? A few brownie points, maybe?

Maybe agnosticism is the way to go- No expectations, no accountability.

I'm using the blog as a diary again. Damn!

48 minutes..

2011-09-11T17:34:00.000-04:00

So I just put laundry in the dryer and have nothing to do for forty-eight minutes. I was just talking to a friend yesterday about how I tend to think through every post I write on my blog- it is usually an activity that spans a couple of days. So just as a fun exercise, I have decided to get as random as is possible for me, and pen down whatever crosses my mind until my laundry gets done!

Okay, that intro just took me two minutes, so forty-six minutes on the clock it is..

The title of this post reminds me of the "Sattar minute" monologue from Chak De... :) But Adtaalees doesn't sound as cool as Sattar !! :P
I love cricket!
I wish I could use fancy-shmancy words while blogging.. :P Or for that matter, write about fancy-shmancy concepts/ ideas..
I hate moving- even if it is to a place that is two miles away. More than the effort of packing and unpacking- it is the mental exercise involved in leaving one place you are familiar with and getting used to a completely new environment. This is the ninth apartment I will be living in, in the three years I have been in the US but I'm still not used to it!
Talking about moving- I think I've spoken about moving wayyy too much on this blog! :P But whatever...it's been an integral part of my life for so many days now!
Setting up a new place is also freakishly expensive man- I've spent 800 bucks in the past ten days already! Never shopped so much since Thanksgiving 2008, when I went to India for the first time..
I hope I can get my new apartment to be as nice as I have imagined it to be.. I am a nester at heart- that's such an integral part of me.. But abhi tak woh feeling hi nahi aa rahi..
One thing is for sure- I am going to miss my current roomies like crazy- I'll still meet them and hang out with them everyday of course, but it's going to be weird to not be living with them! For the record- they have been the best of the fourteen roommates I have had in three years! Honest to God!
Have you ever felt like thinking, speaking and writing in Hindi (or your most comfortable language) the whole day? I wish I could type this whole post in Hindi today.. :)
I sometimes wonder which place to call my own- I was born in Pune, spent five years in Mumbai, stayed for 9 years after that in Qatar, remaining 9 years after that in Pune again and now three years in the US. People always have so many stories to tell of their childhood in some Indian city- the primary school life, taking those NTS scholarship exams, teachers, sports meets, annual day functions, playing after school etc etc.. I have those too, but no one can identify with them because the environment was so different in Doha.. I loved my days in Qatar, but I also wish I could get a chance to experience proper school life in Pune or Mumbai..
I saw Hello Panda biscuits the other day at a frozen yogurt shop and it brought back awesome memories of life in MES Indian School though.. Maybe I like it that I have a different set of experiences than most people... :):)
According to me, the whole "let's-just-be-friends" concept is the most f**ked up statement in the whole world. There should be a limit on the number of times someone can apply it in their life..
Thankfully, I do not say the above from personal experience.. :P But I still think it holds true..
The next person who tells me that guys are uncomplicated is going to get one big rapta from me.. Guys are extremely confused people (just like anyone else..) They just know how to put on a good show of confidence! :P
Fourteen minutes to go.. :)
Thought for the day- "So love the people who treat you right, forget about the ones who don't and believe that everything happens for a reason. If you get a chance, take it. If it changes your life, let it. No body said it'd be easy, they just promised that it would be worth it. Eventually feels a lot better than actually.." This is the reason I love Grey's Anatomy.. :)
September 9, 2010- It's funny how some days change your life forever.. I think sometimes we need to be pushed into the deep side of the pool to learn how to swim..
Koi engineers (specifically mechanical engineers) pe kabhi movie kyun nahi banata-- I know we cannot develop fancy protein sequences for viruses or wear fancy suits and sign controversial multi-billion contracts or have eccentric lives like artists or write code that can destroy the country's security system, but designing and building machinery can be cool too !!!
In the same vein, koi ladkiyon pe DCH ya ZNMD type movies kyun nahi banata! Do you think girls cannot take an adventurous road trip together without being bitchy or shopping the whole time!? That's so cliched! Step up to the challenge, film-makers!
I think surprise birthdays are super-awesome- even the ones that happen seven months after your actual birthday! :)
I miss the east coast on some days- not Rochester specifically- but I miss Gau-Soumya, RIT and New York City !!!
Funny how the smallest of things trigger memories of forgotten events and people- case in point- Honey Bunches of Oats Strawberry Flavor! :P Maybe someone should create a Pensieve where we can store thoughts that never need to be thought of again.. :)
I need to find an escape-spot in Davis- a place I can connect with and where I can go when I want to be away from the chehel-pehel of everyday life and just think, or maybe not-think and just be.. :)
I want to get a cat!
Does married life really change people- I hope not! :(
Guys should not talk (excessively) about girls (any girl, even actresses) being beautiful/ hot/ cute in front of other girls- that's just rude! :P I think Hum Aapke Hain Kaun mein aisa dialogue tha! It's true though.. :)
I love white chocolate mocha!
The mind is such a random instrument.. Never thought it could cross so many dimensions in forty-six minutes!

Alrighty- laundry is done. Now time to post and unpack... :)

And then, it happened- Life!

2011-07-24T21:51:00.000-04:00

Sky-diving is one of the must-do items on my list of things to accomplish in life. But like all items on that list- I want it to be just right- with the right people, the perfect weather, knowing that this is the day! Getting a tattoo was like that- it was completely random- my closest friend was going to visit from PA, I was going through a terrible time in my life and the last thing on my mind was a tattoo! She told me that we'd get it done together and the moment she said it- I knew that I wanted one that weekend! I looked up designs online and again, when my eye fell on my design, something about it resonated with what I was looking for.. Even today, every time I look at my tattoo, it brings a smile to my face. It changed something inside of me... Maybe it was a way of knowing that I was in control even though I had no idea what the end-result was going to be...

Moving across the country has been a similar experience. The reality of it did not hit me until I had shipped all my stuff to California already and was sitting at the Rochester airport with one bag, on my way to an awesome Memorial Day reunion with my friends at NYC before heading to CA. I remember a friend texting me - "This is IT !!" I remember packing my stuff in 90 minutes flat- 90 minutes is all it took to stuff my belongings of two years in bags and boxes- and mind you, I am an organized packer! I remember saying good-bye to my advisor and for the first time, wanting to really hug him because I was so overwhelmed and happy! I remember many other very quick good-byes.. I remember walking on the RIT campus, really seeing all the buildings and sculptures, as if it were my first time once again.. Everything else is a blur...

I landed in Davis, California and went to my new apartment and in the first three hours I spent there- my new room-mate had explained her entire health history to me.. Imagine talking about everything from stomach ulcers to uterine cysts with a person you know for fifteen minutes! It was awesome because she didn't care that I was new! :D First day of work at a new company was exciting- the whole razzmatazz of working in a big company etc etc! Tab woh din tha aur aaj yeh din hain.. It's been seven weeks since the move and my darling roommate's health history has already gotten two pages longer (kidding!), there are ten people I can call friends in this new city, I have projects that I am responsible for at work, and life has taken a successful 270-degree turn.. Somehow, through the avalanche of things that have happened in the past year, I landed up exactly where I belonged!

Sky-diving and getting inked give jitters to a lot of people- I know of so many friends who have gotten on that plane at 5000 feet, or have sat on the tattoo artist's chair and chickened out at the last minute. It's not about how gutsy you are actually- I've always believed that when something feels right, all fear goes away. You just have to jump! And trust that the instructor holding you knows what he is doing! :P And once the jump is over, you look back up at the sky and at the parachute on your back and sit wondering - Man, did I really do that ?!! :)

Somehow whenever people say life happened- it always seems to be the reason for failed ambitions or dreams gone awry. But look at it from my perspective and I say- I am so glad it did !!

The thing about "too good to be true..."

2011-04-30T19:43:00.000-04:00

You know how people say that if something is too good to be true, it probably is... ?! I seriously hope that these people got it wrong this one time..

Coz after a very very very long time, a lot of good things are happening at the same time, and I so so so hope that all this is as real as it can get.. :)

Anyways, I am a believer in buri nazar, so I am not going to divulge any details until everything is all set, which should hopefully be very soon. Until then, I'm pinching myself every minute and keeping my fingers tightly crossed hoping that this streak continues for a while.. I need it and so I humbly accept it! :)

Musings...

2011-04-10T19:57:00.001-04:00

Random things that have happened in the past few days; random thoughts that have crossed my mind..

My group of friends from COEP had a reunion of sorts a few weeks ago. We all met at a friend's place in Baltimore and hung out for the whole weekend. I think it was the most amazing, fun time I have ever had in a very very long time. It's weird how things never change with some people, no matter how much time has passed since you last met. I mean I am in touch with a few of my closest friends from college, but I met a few friends that weekend after like 3 years; and it was still exactly the same- actually I think I had more fun with them than we did even when in COEP! Thank God for long-lasting friendships!
The weekend in Baltimore also made me feel very old and grown-up.. There we all were- with jobs and cars, discussing about our companies; so many of us are engaged and getting married before the end of this year! Seems like yesterday that we all set foot in the US.. Does time pass this fast, really?
Talking about time- I think I have spent so much time now in a transient state that the idea of "settling" in a place doesn't appeal to me anymore.. I mean, I have always been a person who likes to make a place her own- even if it is one side of one bedroom in an apartment- I liked the feeling of owning a place and calling it mine- nesting as they call it. But now, being in one place for too long scares me, bores me and makes me nervous. Do I really have to work in this same company for the next few years now; stay in this same apartment year after year? I think while all people are moving forward, I'm moving backwards.. :P
Have you ever played that game where you think back to what you were doing on this day, a year back? I just realized that a year ago, on this day, I was gearing up for a very dear friend's birthday party- planning this big surprise, wrapping up gifts and all...- and today, just a year later, I don't know anything about that friend's whereabouts! We are as good as strangers.. I hate this game!
I firmly believe that people maketh a place a home. Windy, snowy, humid, dull, drab, tiny- none of these adjectives matter as long as you have the right people to share it with.. Man is a social animal. Man needs people to make life meaningful- the right people.
I always thought new beginnings were exciting- the numerous possibilities, the excitement, the apprehensions- I loved all of that always! But now, I want to go back to things, the way they were. Old is gold. Starting over does not seem fun anymore. Shucks, I am feeling old already! :P
Speaking of age- I recently saw the picture of my younger sister on Sari Day in her college in India- man, she looks so grown-up and pretty! I was staring at that picture for 10 minutes, unable to accept the fact that my sister is so grown-up.. I think I am starting to understand how my parents feel when they see us get older each year..
That Sari Day also doubled up as Rose Day in her college, so my sister was filling me in on the gossip and happenings of the day.. Apparently one of her friends' boyfriend gave her 143 red roses. Why 143- I asked her, assuming that maybe they had been together for 143 days or something! So turns out that 143 stands for "I Love You" !! Man, have I been out of college for this long?!!?
Is it possible to have a job that you love or do all jobs become dull and drab after a few months/years? I mean seriously, I need someone to tell me- is there a job that you can enjoy so much that Mondays don't depress you anymore? You have fun over the weekend, but the idea of going back to work on Monday still seems exciting.. Please tell me that there is a job like that!
I miss the World Cup- never have I felt more Indian than I did on the day of the semi-finals and finals! Man, what a game, what a team, what a performance! Hats off to everyone.. I felt happiest for Sachin Tendulkar actually- after 20 years in the sport, I think he deserved at least one WC win to his long list of achievements.. That joy and satisfaction was so evident on his face. Isn't it amazing how one sport can unite the country to this extent?!

Learning to love lemonade and piles of shit..

2011-03-27T21:52:00.000-04:00

You know that saying about when you think life has thrown a big pile of shit at you, look at others' pile and you'll want yours back? And you know that other saying about when life gives you lemons, you make lemonade? Well, the last week has been a gigantic lesson in how terrible I have been in following these two commandments!

You see- sometimes we get so blinded by what is happening in our life and how out of control it is getting, that we forget to notice the good stuff around us. Like one of my pregnant friends was telling me about how long she took to realize she was actually pregnant! After the initial joy and surprise had weaned off, the only thing she could think about was how dramatically her life was going to change and how fat and hormonal she was getting and how the baby was going to take over her whole life...blah blah. Until, (now this is very Bollywood), the baby kicked one day! And that is when the reality of it all hit her- she has a baby, her own baby !! How awesomely insane was that (for her :P)! So you see, sometimes you need a kick to realize that while some things may not be exactly what you want, there is a purpose in their coming into your life. And maybe you just need to wait to realize what that is. And maybe someday, after that purpose has been achieved, you may actually get the thing you have wanted all along..

So without divulging too much information- let me just give you a gist of what happened. So while I am an essentially positive person, I go into this cocoon at times where I think that the worst stuff in the world is happening to me and only good things happen to everyone else- I'm sure it happens to a lot of us! So last week, I met two people who have had to deal with more crap than me and who were still so happy and positive and full of love! I'm sure they've had their moments of despair, but they also snapped out of it much stronger- and faster- than me. That was, in essence, the kick in my butt. :P Isn't it oddly unsettling, how knowing of another person's difficulties can make you feel better- quite disturbing actually! But to clarify- it's not that I was happy to know what had happened to those people. I just made me feel that I was not alone in this. And I think that is what we all need- to know that we haven't been singled out.

The only downside of kicks like these are that the effect of the jhatka only lasts a few minutes or days at most. After that, keeping yourself motivated and focused on the good stuff is all up to you. And it is definitely not easy- hell, the boring mundanities in life were designed to bring your spirit down. But then, that is where the challenge lies. You need to keep going back to that inspirational moment, and reliving it to remind yourself that all what is happening is good. I cannot tell you how many times I have written positive stuff like this on my blog, just so that I can inspire myself whenever I read it. This sine wave of emotions can get frustrating at times- the hope can feel fake and one tends to gravitate towards the negative because it feels more comforting and real. But I think the best way out of it is to think about what is going to help you move forward in life- the despair or the belief in good? And once you have identified that, just hang on to it and do not stop- EVER.

So, for possibly the ten-thousandth time in my life- I have made a list of fifteen goals I want to accomplish by the end of this year- some are long-term while others are short-term, so as not to overwhelm me too much! I do have a tendency to give up when things start getting a little difficult, which is why I have actually written this down on my blog this time. So that whenever I read this, I am reminded that I should really really really work towards checking them all off my list by December 2011 !!

May the force be with me! :D

When book covers lie..

2011-03-15T23:55:00.001-04:00

I was reading the blog of a friend recently who I have known for about three years now- we are not exactly close, but I cannot call him just an acquaintance either. I have always had the impression that he is a happy-go-lucky kinda guy, whose predominant thoughts are similar to most guys in their 20's- sports, beer, girls, food, cars, Wii games and porn- I know that sounds very judgmental, but I am 95% it's true! :P So anyway, I came across his blog and expected posts of a similar nature. What surprised me was that he had in fact written about a lot of intense topics- thoughts of a very introspective nature, which he had obviously given a lot of thought and emotion to. Reading those posts made me realize how wrong I was in forming an opinion about him. If I hadn't read his blog, I would have probably never known he was even capable of thinking so deeply about life and its associated aspects. What surprised me even more is that he never showed this side of him to most people- I bet most of his friends don't even know he writes a blog.

Are a lot of us like this? Maybe on a very unconscious level, we end up adapting our external persona to the people around us, so that they would like us and want to be with us. Maybe man's innate need for social acceptance causes him to be less than true to his own nature. For example, you may have some strong views on religion, love, moral issues- topics that tend to be a little off-beat and controversial in some cases. If you know that your friend circle is not going to be receptive to your views, then you refrain from bringing up a discussion on it. Instead, you prefer talking about Sachin Tendulkar, the earthquake in Japan or Katrina Kaif's latest movie- topics that you know would make you seem "normal". :P That could be one of the reasons blogging or writing is so therapeutic- we have control over who reads what we write and hence, it eliminates the need to develop this facade around us. Of course, some of us are lucky enough to meet at least a few people in our life who we can be our honest, true self with- no judgment made, no opinions formed, no advice given unless asked for.

This is probably why we one of the earliest lessons we are taught in life are to never judge a book by its cover- or in this case, never judge a book until you have read it half-way through- you never know what surprises are going to spring up! Like in this case, I definitely have a new-found respect for this guy after reading his blog. Wouldn't life be so much simpler if human nature wasn't so complicated...

P.S.- Maybe just out of curiosity, I should ask some of my friends what they think of me after reading my blog- does it serve as an extension of who I portray myself to be externally, or does it reveal a completely different aspect of me too? Should be interesting to know if my blog surprises people.. :) Thoughts of readers are welcome..

Inspirational Sunday!

2011-02-27T15:32:00.000-05:00

Found this quote on a new blogger friend's blog and I'm reproducing it here because something about this philosophy really resonates with my belief too..

“Make a wish and place it in your heart. Anything you want, everything you want. Do you have it? Good. Now believe it can come true. You never know where the next miracle is gonna come from, the next smile, the next wish come true. But if you believe that it’s right around the corner, and you open your heart and mind to the possibility of it, to the certainty of it. You just might get the thing you’re wishing for. The world is full of magic. You just have to believe in it. So make your wish. Do you have it? Good. Now believe in it. With all your heart.”

Isn't that just amazing?!?! :-)

Do we always make the most of what we have?

2011-02-20T21:21:00.000-05:00

So this is going to be one of those other random thoughts that crept into my head a few days back.. I'm trying not to be so analytical about every thought that crosses my mind, but due to some reason- I can't make it stop! Lol.. Good thing about this new obsession is that it at least provides food for thought for new posts on the blog.. :D

So anyway- you know how the economic situation around in the world, and in the US, in particular, has been in the doldrums for some time now?! Of course you know it.. I think the recession has affected the lives of each and every one of us in some way or the other. So anyway, in such cases- one thing people always talk about is making the most of the options we have on hand. So gone are the days when we could afford to be picky about the kind of job we wanted to do, or the kind of company/city we wanted to work in. Of course, you always apply for a job profile you think would suit your qualifications and interests, but by and large, you take what you get *gratefully*, without complaining too much! So, a job in upstate NY?!- Sure; I hate the snow and desperately want to move away from here- but that can wait for later! For now, a job is a job!

And there's nothing wrong with that- I mean, life is about making the most of the cards that are dealt out to you, right? There's always this ring of fire each of one needs to go through- where we are finding our niche, moving an inch closer to financial and emotional freedom, setting the foundation right. Once that is done, we are free to make our choices and demand what we desire and deserve.

So, is it okay to do that with the other aspects of life too- like in relationships? Most people do not get the chance to tell the perfect story- families are imperfect, people are imperfect. In the case of family, it is something we cannot change. So making the most of the situation is the only way to deal with it. But what about friends and especially, a life partner? When we choose the person to spend our life with- do we usually wait for the right one to come along or do we make the most of what we have? And which option is the right one?

I know most people would like to believe in the former option- that they were patient and believed there was a right one and soon enough, he/she came into their life. But isn't there always this moment of desperation some of us face- this fear of what if, just what if there is no such right one?! Or maybe there is, but they cannot afford to wait. Like, moving back to the job scenario. You have a job in hand, which is not the one you always dreamed of- but it's not bad either. You know there is a job out there that is tailor-made for you, but your OPT status is to expire in a month! Would you take your chances and wait it out? Or would you grab the job at hand? Okay, so I know that real life has no such OPT status expiration date- but I hope you get the idea I am trying to project! :D

I guess all I'm wondering is- in friendships, relationships and even in marriages- both the love and arranged kind- the way I always thought it's supposed to be is that you go with your gut feeling. You just know when the people/person is right for you. But there are times when people opt for the practical approach and take what they get. And then make the most of it. Accept it gratefully and learn to be happy with what they have. Is it okay to do that? And is it being fair to the other person? The obvious black and white answer is an emphatic no, but as always, there exists that gray area where things are not always so clearly defined...

India, Love and Acceptance

2011-01-23T18:36:00.000-05:00

I got back two weeks ago from the most wonderful trip to India. It was so amazing, it almost feels unreal.. :P I wanted to start the new year on my blog with a detailed post on the trip, but I'm sure I'm going to burst into tears when I start thinking about it. So maybe I'll talk about it when I'm a little more stable.

So this post is going to be about two random thoughts that have been hovering around my mind for the past few days-

The first thought is about love- I just realized a few days ago, how important a role love plays in life. I mean, there are so many segments to our lives- our careers, our social life, our personal hobbies and interests, our material possessions, our family, ambitions, spirituality. Somehow in all of this, love seems to dominate it all- and by love, I mean, the idea of having someone to come home to, or having someone to call your own. Of course, I understand that this is just a feeling- you can feel that comfort and security even with a close family member or friend or a pet. But not having that feeling is one of the worst feelings in the world, regardless of how abundant all other aspects of your life may be! I know that because for three months, I came home to an empty house with no furniture and a bowl of fish that belonged to my roommate, who was never there! When I could take it no more, I decided to go through the terrible process of moving all my stuff, just so that I was living in a house with people! :P I don't think this hype about love is a bad thing though- I know people talk of self-sufficiency and being independent and what not, and I know that that are important qualities to develop. But at times, it is okay to just let your guard down and allow yourself to be a little bit vulnerable. True, right?

Another thought that came across my mind this morning is about acceptance. Think about it- what is the most common advice people give you when things are not going your way? To just accept the reality and move on. Somehow, no one ever tells you to fight the circumstances and claim what is rightfully yours. I know that acceptance is supposed to be the path of least resistance and subsequently, faster happiness. But maybe that is not the case all the time. Maybe sometimes you need to stop accepting and start forming your own reality; believe that you too can deserve something that you saw only others get. It is a risky proposition for sure, but then again- in order to get success, you have to have the strength to face potential failure!

Reality

2010-12-06T20:18:00.000-05:00

Most of the times, you never realize the value of what you had unless it is taken away from you.

Most people never know what they really want. They know what they would like to want, which is often a result of comparing themselves to someone else and hoping that they could be like them by having the same things. But each person defines happiness and satisfaction and ambition and love differently. What worked for you will very rarely work for me. And if only we knew that, we'd be able to value what we have a lot more. If only we knew ourselves better, we'd be able to ask for exactly what we want and recognize it clearly when we get it. And then, we'd do everything possible to keep it ours forever.

But if that were to happen, then life would be too simple.

So, we lose things. And we lose people. Because we think that what we have is not enough- we can get more. Sure, maybe we can. But is that what we truly want? Is more always good?

And then, as if to prove a point, you get -- more. You get what you thought you wanted. Only to realize that you don't want it anymore. That's not who you are. You want what you had. But, as always, it's too late.

Or is it? Can you go back to what you had? Is it okay to hope?

Humbled!

2010-12-02T16:44:00.000-05:00

"Dear Suparna,

Congratulations! It has been an honor working with you on this project. Thank you for all your hard work and helping me to look smarter than I really am. I admire your skill, perseverance and unending patience with this absent-minded professor. I hope you found the experience worthwhile and I wish you the best of luck in your future endeavors. Please let me know if there is anything I can do to help.
Welcome to the world of scholars!

Cheers, Jim"

When your thesis advisor gives you a gift and a card with the above message at the end of your defense, it is the most humbling feeling in the whole wide world! Here is an amazing advisor and guide, with years of experience, and who is absolutely brilliant in his field and he tells me that I made him look smart! I wanted to write a long, detailed post capturing what I went through in those 40 minutes and the feeling after. But I don't think I can ever have words to describe it!

Two days to D-Day

2010-11-30T08:24:00.000-05:00

This is going to be a short one, since I have very limited time for distractions right now!

So my thesis defense is in two days- on December 2, 2010. I know there are hundreds of Masters students who defend their thesis every year, but it is always special and nerve-wrecking when you know it is going to be yours!

I get weird jolts every morning as I countdown to the D-Day and I feel optimistic on one hand, that all my hard work of the past 15 months is going to pay off. But on the other hand, there is also some amount of nervous energy, which I guess is natural! I have the first draft of the written document in my hand- 100 pages that basically encapsulate all the work I have done! Actually, I should change that- all the good work I have done. No one writes about their failed experiments and failed ideas..and believe me, there were so many of those! But then, as my professor says- that is research, and only you know what you took away from all those failures!

For now, I just hope everything goes fine on Thursday... It is one hour that I want to go by as peacefully as possible.. :)

Wish me luck, dear readers! :)

Attitude of Gratitude

2010-11-21T18:43:00.000-05:00

This article isn't my creation- my mother's friend sent this as a forward to her. I loved it so much that I wanted to reproduce it on the blog, as a reminder to everyone out there to take five minutes everyday just to say "THANK-YOU" to the people who make a difference in your life...

************************************************************************************

Appreciation : What to appreciate, When and How: an Important Lesson!

One young academically excellent person went for an interview for a managerial position in a big company. He passed the first interview; BUT in that Comapny, the director did the last interview, made the last decision.

The director discovered from the CV, that the youth's academic result was excellent all the way, from the secondary school until the postgraduate research, never was there a year he did not score. The director asked, "Did you obtain any scholarship in school?" and the youth answered "no".

The director asked, " Did your father pay your school fees?". The youth answered, "my father passed away when I was one year old and it was my mother who paid my school fees".

The director asked, " Where did your mother work?" the youth answered, "my mother worked as cloth cleaner." The director requested the youth to show his hands and the youth showed a pair of hands that was smooth and perfect to the director.

The director asked, " Did you ever help your mother wash clothes before?" The youth answered," never, my mother always wanted me to study and read more books, furthermore, my mother could wash clothes faster than I could"

The director said, I have a request, when you go back today, go and help to clean your mother's hand, and then see me tomorrow morning.

The youth felt that the chance of landing the job was high and when he went back, he happily wanted to clean his mother's hands. His mother felt strange. With happiness mixed with fear, she showed her hands to the kid.

The youth cleaned his mother's hands slowly and his tears fell as he did that. It was the first time he noticed that his mother's hands were so wrinkled, and that there were so many bruises in her hands. Some bruises were so painful that she shuddered when his mother's hands were cleaned with water.

This is the first time that the youth realized and experienced that it is this pair of hands that washed the clothes every day to earn him the school fees and that the bruises in the mother's hand were the price that the mother paid for his graduation and academic excellence and probably his future.

After finishing the cleaning of his mother's hands, the youth quietly washed all the remaining clothes for his mother.

That night, the mother and son talked for a very long time.

Next morning, the youth went to the director's office. The director noticed the tear in the youth's eye and asked: " Can you tell what you did and learnt yesterday in your house?"

The youth answered, " I cleaned my mother's hands and also finished washing all the remaining clothes'

The director asked, "Please tell me what you felt"

The youth said:
"Number 1, I know what appreciation is now'. Without my mother, I would not be successful today.
Number 2, Now I know how to work together with my mother. Only now do I realize how difficult and tough it is to get something done.
Number 3, I know the importance and value of family relationship."

The director said, " This is what I am asking, I want to recruit a person that can appreciate the help of others, a person who knows the suffering of others to get things done, and a person that would not put money as his only goal in life to be my manager. You are hired.

Later on, this young person worked very hard, and received the respect of his subordinates, every employee worked diligently and as a team and the company improved tremendously.

The Lessons from this anecdote:
A child who has been protected and habitually given whatever he needs, develops "entitlement mentality" and always puts himself first. He is ignorant of his parents' efforts. When he starts work, he assumes every person must listen to him, and when he becomes a manager, he would never know the suffering of his employees and always blame others. These kinds of people, may/will achieve good results and may be successful for a while, but eventually would not feel a sense of achievement or satisfaction.

If we happen to be this kind of (protective) parent, this is the time to ask the question- whether we did/do love our kids or destroy them.
-You can let your kid live in a big house, eat a good meal, learn to play the piano, watch a big screen TV but when you are cutting grass, please let them experience it.
-After a meal, let them wash their plate and bowl together with their brothers and sisters.
-It is not because you do not have money to hire a maid, but it is because you want to love and show them the correct way.
-You want them to understand that no matter how rich their parents are, one day they will grow old, become weak and that their hair too will grow grey,.

-The most important thing is for your kid to learn how to appreciate, experience and learn the effort and ability needed to work with others to get things done. They should also value, appreciate what the parents have done and love them for who they are!

A Few Good Blogs

2010-11-17T18:22:00.002-05:00

One of the interesting after-effects of quitting Facebook is that now I use my blog as my window to the world- and in this case, my social world comprises of fellow blogger friends. In the past few days, whenever I crave for some FB-isque timepass, I check the latest updates on my blogroll and then navigate to other people's blogs through them and so on and so forth.. What is enjoyable about this is that I have come across such well-written, innovative and thought-provoking posts! Satisfies my craving for good reads and is definitely a lot more enriching than Facebooking! :P

So, I thought I should direct some of you to some of the posts/blogs I particularly liked..

1) Nupur just wrote the most amazing post today- I think women need posts like these to remind themselves how strong and capable they actually are. I mean, I did not ever have even an iota of doubt regarding this, but posts like these make you appreciate and respect yourself as a woman, a lot more! Hats off to us! :)
2) Sometimes even the most mundane happenings around our life can become food for an interesting blog. This article is a really hilarious take on how arranged marriages work in India. Another amusing story here.
3) I love this blog !!! Got some very insightful posts, some are very creative too- which is expected, given he just published his own book! But while on the topic of arranged marriages, I love this very filmy, but true story- It's not easy for a guy to write from a girl's point of view, but this guy has done it really really well.. (Requires guts to do that, too!)
4) I'm sure a lot of frequent bloggers know about Sayesha and her bar! :) She is probably the most vibrant girl I know- and I know her only through her blogposts! But they go the whole nine yards- from sport to movies (of course!) to family to work etc. Definitely worth spending some time!
5) This is the blog of a fellow COEP-ian. He was my junior and from another department, so I never knew him personally. But his blog has some very motivational and thought-provoking posts. Now, this guy is doing some big stuff at MIT and some of his posts are just accounts of his interactions with some rather influential people- those are definitely some good reads!

Well, that is it for now. I hope you enjoy some of them! I would have liked to put some technology/politics/world issues related stuff too- but somehow I never come across anything that makes an impact. If you do know any blogs focusing on these aspects, then please direct me to them.

High School Music

2010-11-16T09:38:00.001-05:00

Okay, so I write this post at the risk of completely changing the image most of my friends and blog readers have had about me!

I have always been into music- played the synthesizer for about 5-6 years, dabbled in singing a bit, was in a "band" in school and engineering college. I do not have any particular influences as such because my interests have ranged from Indian and Western classical to hard rock and somehow, I still have favorites in each of these categories! What happened was that at different stages of my (rather short, but memorable) musical journey, I met people with such different interests, and each of them introduced a new dimension to my awareness. Like, my very first music teacher was into hardcore Carnatic music. My mom has always been more into Hindustani and was the one who introduced me to Marathi classics too! Chirag- who is one of my very good friends and the most amazing musician I know- is a huge fan of Yanni and I was addicted to his music at one point of time, thanks to Chiggy! The music class I went to in Pune focused more on Bollywood music and stuff.. Then, in my first few years of engineering- I got introduced to all kinds of rock music because of Nish- he also taught me to play a bit of drums! But the biggest constant through all these years has been my sister. She doesn't really sing or play any instrument- but she has always been into music of all kinds. Sometimes I'd wonder where she found out about all these songs! So my tastes in music have probably been concurrent with what her current favorites were. Of course, then- it is no surprise that there was a point of time when all we used to listen to was Britney Spears! I mean, she was a big thing when my sister was in her pre-teens !! Then, I remember this time when she was obsessed with High School Musical- when it released- like a zillion years ago!

So we had this ritual okay- my mom, sis and I would have lunch every afternoon (on holidays and weekends)- and then mom would go off to work and she and I would be "allowed" an hour of break time (Well, if you have a teacher mom, you understand what I mean! :P). So in that one hour, we'd watch either some serial episodes or part of a movie on the computer. Most of the time, my sis would decide what we watch. So she'd download some stuff on Limewire and Napster (it was free then!). She was the one who introduced me to Friends- I used to think it was cliched and sexist before she had me hooked! She also made me see movies like Bend it like Beckham and of course, High School Musical!

So what's the point of all this?! Well, so turns out I haven't updated my iPod playlist in yeeaaarrrsss... So even though it is the end of 2010, I still have some HSM songs on there, which happened to come up this morning in the shuffle list thingy! I couldn't help but smile when I heard some of those songs- remembered all those times when we used to actually learn the lyrics and try to imitate the scenes and stuff !! Yeahhh well, we still do that sometimes- what's life without a little goofiness eh! :P

So this goes out to my lil' sis who is unfortunately not so lil' any more! :)

Remember the days when we believed with all our heart and honesty that we'd grow up and do something so "different" from what everyone else was doing and believed that the guy who was our "best friend", would end up becoming the love of our life !! Ahhh...the good times! :D:D

Notes

2010-11-10T17:54:00.000-05:00

Exactly a month from today, I will be in India !!! I cannot wait! I know I am luckier than most students because I have got the chance to go to India every Christmas since I arrived in the US- but this time's trip is more valued because for the first time, I have a crazy, maddening urge to see my parents. I saw my mom six months ago during her trip here, but I think I have never missed her more. So much has happened in the past two months and I think we as a family, have been trying to get over things just through conversations over the telephone. I really really need to feel my parents' physical presence and support around me.
Point 1 brings me to my second point- It's funny how you realize the value of every friend and family member when times get a little difficult. In the past two months, I have been at my communicative best with my friends, some of whom I haven't spoken to in over 3 years- got in touch with so many of them, and it sure feels good! I intend to keep it that way.. :)
I have also realized how some people can get so superficial- people you thought you could bank on at any time of day. This has been one of my biggest lessons since coming to the US, but I think this warrants a separate post.
Three weeks from today, I will be done with my thesis defense! D-O-N-E !!! Yesterday, my thesis advisor asked me how it felt. I told him I couldn't believe it was over! O-V-E-R !! Work that have been doing since March 2009 is finally coming to an end!
Before I rejoice over point 4, one of the biggest things I need to do in the next three weeks is write my document and funnily enough, this time writing isn't coming easily to me! I think I should seriously consider Gauri's advice of treating it like an 8 hour job and just getting it done with, once and for all!
Even though things didn't go as planned on some fronts of my life recently, there are still so many other things that have gone way better than I thought they would. I am a person who believes in signs and if the signs of the past few weeks are anything to go by- then I am grateful and thankful to God. I know things are changing for the better! I can feel it. Amen.
I also believe in jinxes- which is why I hate people telling me that I am lucky or constantly talking about any minor successes or good things that come my way! It scares me. I know it is paranoia, but I have had some experiences which have made me believe in these things.
I am so tired of living alone- I think that has made the past few months a lot worse than they should have been. I cannot wait to live with some people and have a social life again... :P
Another thing that is funny is how you realize so many things about yourself in times of adversity. Even things that were glaringly obvious in the past, but you never chose to pay attention to them. I seriously think that if we really believe in this, getting over difficult times becomes a lot easier.
I have been off Facebook for three weeks now- for multiple reasons which I do not wish to get into. But I don't miss it now at all! I did have withdrawal symptoms for the initial few days (sigh!), but now I am happy to be away from all social networking stuff! It gives me more time to do productive things. I think I'll be back though, just because it's a good way to keep in touch with some school friends living in other countries- maybe after 3-4 months.

Back to some thesis writing now.. :)

Happy Diwali !!

2010-11-05T19:36:00.002-04:00

Happy Diwali to all my amazing friends and readers of this blog! Wishing you a year full of lights, prosperity, happiness and success.. :-):-)

Diwali is my most favorite festival of all time. Not that I don't like other festivals, but there are some occasions that resonate more joy than others- Diwali is one of them for me. Like I know Ganesh Chaturthi is a big deal in Maharashtra, but some how it has never been a very big deal in my family because we never kept Ganpati at home. I like Dussera too, but somehow the excuse to light lamps and Lakshmi Pujan and everything just make Diwali a lot more festive for me! Surprisingly again, while most people like Diwali for the faaral, it was again never a big thing in my family. My grandmother would make some faraal type items, but my mom was always so busy around this time of year that she had time to only make one sweet or something like that.. And to be frank, that was completely fine with all of us in my family. We still had such a good time getting together and celebrating!

Obviously, such days make me miss my family even more. It's funny how every family has these peculiar stories associated with certain traditions or days. My family is not very ritualistic- I mean, my grandparents are, but my parents' generation downwards is ritualistic to an extent. We do all that is needed to be done, but suitably modify it to our comfort level- which I think is a good sign of evolution. My extended family consists of 14 people in all- 8 adults and 6 children- which is quite okay compared to those Big Indian Family standards! So, every Diwali day, we all gather at my grandparents' house for the aarti.. And we're talking like 5 AM! Of course, even though we all stay within a 3 mile radius, we always end up getting late to reach their place and eventually can start the aarti only by 6 AM or so! At home, mom is yelling at my sister and me to put on a bindi and some jewelery, which we never want to do! My grandfather gets agitated coz we're all late, but eventually everyone gathers around the small little devghar they have and start singing the bhajans (which I don't think any of us cousins know! :P) Finally, about an hour later, we're done with everything. We all ask for out elders' blessings and the usual hugs and wishes follow! :D

Then, we have another ceremony where the women in the family are supposed to perform aarti for all the men and then the men do the same for the women. Now, I don't know what this part of the ritual is called and why it is done, but it's always nice for the women coz that's when they get loads of cash as a Diwali gift! :P This is again a hilarious ceremony. First and foremost, out of the 7 men in the family, 3 are kids (my cousins), so getting them to gather in the living room is one big task! Meanwhile my grandmother is bustling around the kitchen getting the puja ki thali ready, coz frankly speaking, she's the only one who does this ceremony with all seriousness! So finally, the aarti begins. Now in India, when performing the aarti, you are supposed to sing a hymn or song too. We, being from Karnataka, sing a Kannada song- which again only my grandmother knows the lyrics too! But this is the song she's been singing for centuries now, so we (my mom, aunts, sister) kinda know the distorted Kannada words and the rhythm- so we just sing along with her, basically messing it up more than required! And of course, this is accompanied by a lot of laughter and very amused expressions on the men's faces, demanding a more sincere aarti from the womenfolk! :P

So anyway, the aarti is done, the thali is full of money and now it's time for the men to repeat the same thing for us. This part of the ceremony is a lot funnier because well, the guys don't know what they're supposed to do! And my grandfather cannot participate actively because he cannot stand for long without support. So he sits on his "throne" in the living room, presiding over the function and giving out instructions to the others. The men mess up the aarti song even more and apply huge tikas on our foreheads with their giant hands and it's all one big laughter riot! Finally, the ceremony is complete and everyone heads to the dining room to eat the faraal my grandmother has laid out on the table.

It's funny that this is the part of Diwali I miss a lot because to be frank, it is just something we do because our grandparents want us too- none of us understand the significance of it all! But still, it is one of those unique family bonding things- it makes us all come together at 6 AM on a weekend morning and laugh and be merry! And frankly speaking, even though we stay so close by, it is only occasions like these which cause the 14 of us to gather under one roof..

At nights, we are all in our separate houses, getting ready for the Lakshmi Pujan- my mom gets out all the jewelery and does the prep work. The actual puja is pretty short- maybe 30 minutes at the most. The beautiful star shaped aakashkandil is burning outside our house. Finally, my sister and I go outside and light lamps around the whole house- in the windows, at the doorstep. The whole housing community is filled with such pretty lamps and lanterns- truly like the festival of lights! We have never burst firecrackers during Diwali because it's harmful to the environment and is a waste of money. And most importantly, we have a cat who gets petrified of crackers, so we'd never make it worse for him! And that is it- we all just spend the evening chatting or watching a movie or taking family pictures!

Sometimes I wonder what will happen when my grandparents are gone- will we all meet again on Diwali morning for the aarti? Will all of us even be in the same city/country- coz I've already missed two Diwalis now! I guess my mom will carry forward the tradition coz after my grandmother, she seems to be most inclined towards these rituals. And besides, I think when you grow up watching these rituals, then you gravitate towards them without realizing it. Like for example, my mom always says that you're not supposed to leave your house dark and empty on the night of Lakshmi Pujan and so on instinct, I refused to go out with my friends last night coz the idea of leaving my apartment empty was unacceptable to me. It has become a part of my belief system now- regardless of whether it's true or not..

I guess for now, I thank God for all those wonderful memories! This has been a very quiet Diwali for me- I went to school in the morning (wore a salwar kameez after months, which was enjoyable!), got a small box of sweets from an Indian store, did a quick Lakshmi Puja in the evening and then lit a whole bunch of scented tealight candles all over my room. I had a long conversation with my family and got to speak to a childhood friend who I had not spoken to for more than 15 years and chatted with a few other friends online. I was happy and content. This is Diwali, just the way I like it! :)

Attraversiamo !!!

2010-11-02T19:16:00.004-04:00

There is a lot of construction work going on an RIT for the past few months. Because of that, the usual route I take to go from the Industrial Engineering department (where I belong) to the Color Science building (where I do my thesis) has been blocked, forcing me to take an extra long road through the Quality department. Now, on my long walk, I also pass by the Center for Access Studies. For the past month, every time I pass through those corridors, I find this amazing bumper sticker on every professor's office door- "Don't postpone JOY". It is written in bright purple with the most exuberant font ever! Every time I see it, I smile- I don't know why, but I have always loved that sticker- such a simple message, yet so powerful.

Today, I managed to get one of those stickers for myself. I plan to paste it on my wall- directly above the makeshift mandir in my room. The reason I decided to put it there is so that I can see it every day and remind myself that nothing/no-one is worth my happiness and peace of mind.

I don't want to get too philosophical, but the past few days have been sort of a glaring revelation for me. I have been thinking a lot, contemplating on various issues- past and present. And I realize how easy it is for a person to join his happiness to that of another person.

If you're happy, I'm happy.
If you're sad, I'm sad.
Why?

I know we all are social beings and that is definitely a good thing- but it does not mean we wait for someone else to give us happiness. Dependence is good, but only as long as you don't make it your slave. I think I've been spending some time lately, really thinking about what I want to do, what I would feel happy doing! And even though I may not have all the answers, just devoting this time to myself gives me a very big sense of accomplishment. I think I am about to bring in some very big changes in my thinking and my belief system. And they are all changes for the better. It is going to be a slow, gradual process with every possibility of me reverting to my old self- but I think just writing it down here makes it seem a lot more serious. It feels like a pact I've made with myself. Which brings me to the title of my post- Attraversiamo is an Italian word I came across in Eat, Pray, Love. It means "to cross over", actually in the sense of crossing a road. But just like Elizabeth Gilbert, I prefer to take its more cosmic meaning of moving over to a better side- transformation!

Being 25 is sexy... :D:D

2010-10-23T13:24:00.005-04:00

So the last few posts have been a little too serious and definitely not the type of stuff this blog is used to seeing. Well, it has been a slightly tough time and I guess I was using the blog to vent out my frustrations. But thankfully, some old and new friends have very successfully managed to show me the lighter, brighter, happier side of life and so to commemorate that- here is a positive post! :)

So, I am from the batch of 1985 and so all of us from this super-awesome batch turned 25 this year. Some (like me) passed through the golden doors much earlier this year, whereas a few others are heading that way over the next two months of 2010. Nonetheless, you know this whole hype around turning 25 right- silver jubilee, quarter life crisis, time to settle down, career, marriage blah blah blah... To be frank, it's just like any other birthday- you get a year older, but you still essentially remain the same person. It's not like the moment the clock turns 12, you undergo this magical transformation where your purpose in life becomes crystal clear and you attain this new found respect for life unknown to you before. Sure, there are changes- like a dear friend discovered on his 25th birthday- his tolerance for alcohol was no longer as strong as it was when he was 18! :-(

So anyway, with all this negative vibe going around turning 25, it was pretty heartening to see an amazingly cheerful birthday wish from one friend to another on her 25th birthday. I'm quoting from her Facebook page-

"You have successfully reached the first major summit! The view is fabulous from this point and I hear it gets better every year!"

I was so happy when I read this message- reminded me that just because I turned 25 doesn't mean that there is some imaginary deadline staring at me in the face! I partly blame our parents for this though- they somehow are still living in this 80's era where 25 was the then 35 !! :P And what is worse is that this weird rule applies more to girls than guys.. I mean, I don't see parents of 25-year old guys asking them about when they want to settle down.. Then why us girls?! Hamein bhi toh apni zindagi jeene do..

So anyways, I've decided to stop worrying for now. Life sucks and is crappy and is unfair and is dark and twisty and is full of a**holes- Agreed. But it is still a gift and I am going to try and cherish it from now on. :D:D

With this happy thought, I begin another crazy week... :D

The "What If..." Saga

2010-10-09T13:34:00.003-04:00

Regrets.

Life is always full of regrets. I think people who say they're happy with every decision they've made in life or are satisfied with the way their life has turned out to be, are on a dose of Prozac or something... :P How many times have we let our minds wander away with thoughts of "What if X had happened instead of Y..."

The worst thing is that, often, the way our life turns out is not entirely dependent on us. The choices we make can never be for our individual desires alone. Somehow, our mind is conditioned to think of others' happiness, to put our family and friends before us, even if that means a little bit of sacrifice on our part. And then there are times when people think it's okay to take our lives in their hands and turn it upside-down AND inside-out and then hand it back to us! The problem with choices is that it's not always easy to distinguish the right from the wrong. You know that story where the author tells you that the path that seems more difficult is often the right one? Well, what do you do when you cannot determine what the more difficult path is? When both seem equally tough, or equally easy...

What if...
What if I had not moved back to India..
What if I had told you what I wanted instead of taking the beaten road..
What if I had left chapter 2 for option instead of chapter 4..
What if I had told you what happened immediately, instead of waiting for things to worsen six months later..
What if he had been in a good mood that day, instead of the foul mood is always is in..
What if I had gone to another university, instead of running after that scholarship..
What if I had not been a frequent user of Gtalk..
What if you had been honest with me from the start, instead of choosing not to speak..
What if we had never gone for that walk that day...
What if I had said "I'm not done fighting for this" instead of "Okay"..
What if you had said "I don't want to give up" instead of "Good-bye"..
What if you had realized you took a hasty decision two days later..
What if...

The problem with the 'what if's' is that they are like little threads of hope. You want to continue hanging on to them because you believe that life will give you a chance some day to relive that moment again. And when that chance comes, you will correct what you (think you) have wronged. Unfortunately though, the brutal truth is that such moments come only to a very very lucky few! And the second brutal truth is that unless you let go of the 'what if's', you can never truly move on..

I guess the thing about choices is that they were never meant to be easy- unless it's a choice between ice-cream and fruit! :P But you have to make them anyway, all the time! No amount of fretting for days and thinking things through can prepare you for the moment you make that one final decision. During such times, the best thing to do is always to take a deep breath and trust your instincts- and pray like hell, that you have the strength to face the music that follows!

Besides, I think in the long run, you learn to deal with the repercussions better. You learn to let go faster. And you learn to look for the silver lining everywhere you go.. Except for those choices that change your life forever. Such choices always linger on, somewhere at the back of your mind.. You try to forget them, to lock them up in a tiny box, but the scars always remind you of those times. When that happens, you should also remember that they were wounds of victory, not defeat...

The Big Cosmic Question

2010-10-03T16:13:00.004-04:00

I've often wondered about this often-discussed concept of fate, destiny, karma etc etc. What exactly is true- Is everything predestined or do we have some amount of control over what happens in our lives? Now I know every human on this planet who has gone through life, has an opinion on this question- and I'd love to hear what you think! That's what the comments section is for! :D But you see, I haven't posted an article on this blog for a year now, so the likelihood of someone reading this post and actually commenting is pretty minuscule.. :P So, for now, I'm going to jot down my two cents on this concept..

Well, for starters, the reason I have always wondered about this issue is because of my mom. You see, she's been through the whole spectrum- from being a die-hard believer in horoscopes, numerology, even tarot, to having mellowed down over the past few years to a more balanced approach towards life. So every time anyone is going through a rough phase, she doesn't shy away from using her experiences to jostle them back to the harsh reality that is life! Of course, I mean this in a good way! :) Secondly, it helps when you have friends who have very interesting takes on the subject too..

So coming back- There was a point in my life when the eternal truth I believed in was that 'good things happen to good people'. And so, be good to all, be honest and sincere and always have integrity (which is the biggest virtue in the world, according to me). Of course, this was a time when the biggest problems in my life were not getting a 90 in English and the guy sitting on the 4th bench in class not smiling at me.. :P Over time, a lot of bigger problems took their place. During such frustrating times, my mom always told me that all things happen for a reason. This may seem like the worst thing that could ever happen to you at that point of time, but this phase is going to make you stronger so that you can deal with worse things when you get older. My mom always visited these funny astrologers, and tried out numerous pujas and stones and everything to try to avert the "bad stuff", but I participated with her only to keep her happy, not because I believed in it. I still do not believe in people who claim to have the powers to predict my future- I do not believe any human being is so gifted. And the amazing thing is that, over the years, my mom stopped believing in such people too! Another thing that changed is that now, I have an opinion on what life is about. I don't say it is universal or that it is true, but it is something that my life has taught me and it is something that helps me live better.

You see, something very interesting happened many years ago. There came a point in my life when I began to act completely out of character. Of course, at that point of time, it seemed perfectly natural and also felt like good-natured rebellion. But when I think of it now, it was so so anti-me! Without getting down to the gory details, lets just say that I was digging a big, huge hole for myself. And I could see that I was digging this hole and knew I should stop. But I just couldn't! The realization of what I had done struck when I was buried so deep that I didn't know how to come back.. It seems so foolish and immature when I think of that time right now, but it was definitely not so funny then. Let's just say that it took me a long time to get out of that sh*t, but I came out of it and washed myself clean.. :P Even today, whenever I think back on what happened, I only wonder what had come over me that made me behave so uncharacteristically! One of the plausible explanations I have is the famous Master Oogway line- "'Often, the steps we take to avoid destiny, lead us to it..'

Yup, regardless of what people may say or think, I do believe that destiny has some role to play in our life. There are some things in our life we have no control over. Incidents happen when you least expect them to, even when you think you've done all the right things! This does not mean you throw your hands in the air and just stroll through life. It is your job to take something away from everything that happens in life- the good and the bad stuff. When something good happens, you appreciate the goodness in life and learn to value what you have. And when things go against your wishes- you learn to deal with it and make the most of it. I am not a religions person, but I do believe in the existence of someone out there who is looking out for me. And I know that he is constantly trying to filter out the bad stuff from my life and that he is going to connect the dots somehow. You remember that crappy situation I mentioned earlier? Well, something good came out of that too. I may have gone through the worst two years of my life, but in the end, I got a chance to mend some very crucial relationships. I got the chance to value what I had been given and I definitely would not have been here today had I not realized this. So you see..it took four years, but the dots connected.

So, where does this leave us with the good = good equation?! You ever heard of the saying 'what goes around, comes around?! Well, it's true !!! So you do good, so that you can build positive relationships in life. When your destiny lands you in a bowl of crap, you are going to need people to help you out of it. And the only way people will respect you, is if you respect them. You do good because you want to do good, not because life is a balance sheet!

What is important is that you push through the bad stuff and believe that some good is about to come. The only thing constant in life is change and so why waste time worrying, right?! Watch reruns of Friends and Scrubs, read books, paint, read this article, reconnect with old friends, travel and take exciting classes- do anything, but push through it! And keep faith in the good things in life- friends who value you no matter what, a family that loves you no matter what, and a purpose in life that keeps you going no matter what.. :)

My mom sent me these lines from a book she reads quite a lot nowadays- The Secret. It is a bit cheesy, but I think this really summarizes a lot of what I've been trying to pen down-

So often, when things change in our lives, we have such a resistance to the change. This is because when people see a big change appearing, they are often fearful that it is something bad. But it is important to remember that when something big changes in our lives, it means something better is coming. There cannot be a vacuum in the Universe, and so as something moves out, something must come in and replace it. When change comes, relax, have total faith, and know that the change is ALL GOOD. Something more magnificent is coming to you!

There's a Stranger in my House

2009-12-07T22:25:00.006-05:00

I'm about to enter the last lap of my life as a grad student in an American university, and in addition to that, I'm about to turn the BIG 25 very soon (in less than a week, actually.. :P), so as a result, I'm in a very contemplative mood for the past few days.. No, it's not the whole "quarter-life crisis" brouhaha, thankfully! I don't really care too much about that.. It's more the finishing up of my Masters that is playing on my mind. It's like the end of an era! :D

If you are a student studying in a university away from home, a quintessential part of your life are your hostel/dorm/apartment and in effect, your roommates. And especially if you're studying in a different country, one could go so far as to say that your roommates are like your family away from home. I've always wanted to live in a hostel environment. When I was applying for undergrad programs, I was ready to even study in godforsaken parts of Maharashtra just so that I could get the opportunity to experience life away from home! Unfortunately, my mom didn't think too highly of my ideas and that plan was tucked away in some corner of my mind. So when I decided to apply to the US for grad studies, one of the major motivating factors for me was living with roommates! Of course, those were the days I wore those beautiful rose-tinted glasses.. It was going to be awesome, I thought- living with strangers, adjusting to their whims and fancies, disputes, making up- all the works. Little did I know that the reality would be far faaarrr from beautiful.. Don't get me wrong, I've had some great roomies- but now, eighteen months and eight roommates later, I know that living with strangers is not all hunky dory.

The most astonishing part of all this is the things it teaches you about yourself. I always thought I was a very accommodating person; and I definitely am. But I am a lot more aware of my threshold levels now. Like for example, on some days, even a badly-made bed with a crumpled bedsheet is enough for my fuse to blow! The funniest thing happened last week- I have this mattress in the living room of my apartment- my friend's actually- which is like my seat. Yes, I am very Sheldon about my seat- I hate it if anyone sits there when I want to, and I can get pretty cranky about it. And unbelievable as it may sound, I actually sulked for an hour last week because my roommate moved my laptop and MATLAB book to another chair and sat on my seat- MY seat! I was just thinking about it a few days ago and couldn't help but laugh at myself! Why did I have to make such a big deal about it !! But see, that's me apparently! :P

Anyway don't start getting wrong ideas about me- I also realized in the course of this "adventure", that I am a very nice person too (like I didn't know that already.. Lol). I can be very considerate, and put aside my differences with you, if I know you're going through a hard time. And I will also go for a walk in the snow with you and talk about the weather- if I know that's what is going to make you feel better. :P:P

Well, this is probably going to be the last set of roommates I am going to live with, but I only hope and pray that if I have more roomies in store for me- let them please be nice and fun-loving! I've outlived my bad-roomie karma! :) And well, I should be thankful to all the ones I have lived with- all the self-awareness wouldn't have happened if it weren't for you! And one other thing- living with guys is easier than living with girls- a fact I always knew, but now firmly believe !! :)

An Independence Day Thought

2009-08-15T01:42:00.008-04:00

Writing a post on India and patriotism on Independence Day is one of the most cliched things to do. It's like- the whole of blogosphere is gonna do it, so I might as well go with the flow and give my two-pence on Independence and the greatness of my country. Like anyone cares about what I think India should do to become the next super power !! :P

Anyway, this is not going to be one of those posts. I am not one of the people who have great, earth-shattering ideas about what is wrong with the Indian governance or the Indian mindset. I admit it publicly on this blog today- I have not voted even once. And I am NOT proud of it. Every time elections approached, I'd think to myself- I should register myself and my family at least this year, but I was too lazy to stand in those long queues and complete those forms. I am also not one of those people who keeps myself up-to-date with the Budget or Elections or any such thing that actually affects my country. Like any second Indian on the road, I have ideas about what the Government should do to eradicate poverty or improve the economic condition, but like every Indian on the road, I don't know what to do with those ideas. In short, I can call myself a passive patriot.

Why call myself a patriot at all, you may ask then?

Because, I do love India. I love everything it symbolizes- the cricket, the festivals, the heat, the crowded streets, the films, the food, the mix of culture and urbanization...everything. I am one of those people who stands even if I hear the National Anthem being played in the colony next to mine during jhandavandan on Independence or Republic Day. I am one of those people who would have genuinely become an IAF Officer had I been an inch taller and I would be the proudest person in the world if tomorrow, my son or daughter decide to join the Indian Army. I felt immense grief when Kalpana Chawla died aboard Columbia and when India lost the 2003 World Cup to Australia. I also felt immense pride when A.R. Rahman won the Oscars or when TATA Motors developed the one-lakh car. These may seem trivial things, but for me, they symbolize my Indianness. They are my ways of expressing my love and respect for my country.

Every second engineering graduate in India is probably pursing a Masters in some university in the US. I've seen so many brilliant seniors I had in COEP complete their MS here, get a job in one of the US companies, get married and settle down with a nice apartment with a Honda/Toyota in their garage. They come to India once in two years, children with American accents in tow, and throw one big party in the "hall" of some fancy restaurant- one place to meet all relatives and friends kinda thing. And that's it! Fifteen days later, they're back to a Starbucks every morning and using toilet paper !! :P PD's brother-in-law has been in the US for around 10-12 years and believe me, every time he visits his hometown, he stocks up on mineral water bottles because he is scared that he'll catch an infection if he drinks the municipality water! Imagine that !!! And though it's too early to say, I am 95% sure that's gonna be me in a few years' time. I'm not complaining, I came here out of choice- I wanted to experience the educational system and the life here. But what starts out as an experience of a few years becomes a never-ending fight to build bank balances and fulfilling desires. And then, we don't have the guts to get out of the comfort zone.

Life in India is hard- no doubt about it. To do anything noteworthy, you have to fight the corruption and the red-tape and the reservations and the entire system. Even getting a seat into one of the top universities in India like the IITs or the IIMs is one big fight- it requires years of perseverance, determination and hardwork. Let's face it, apart from universities like say Stanford or MIT, doing a Masters in any other US university is hardly comparable to surviving an IIT/IIM/ISB/NID/NSD/FTII etc. And then comes the part about getting a good job and surviving the initial "donkey-work" years to actually get the chance to make a difference. Only someone with true love for his country and a burning desire to contribute to its progress can happily live through all of that. With the current recession that's hit the whole world, a common joke among Indian grad students is that they are intelligent, hardworking, qualified folks who are willing to work for less and that is their USP. And while this is only said in good humor, I often think to myself- why do we do this to ourselves?! Why don't we accept that we are equally competent to our American counterparts and hence don't deserve any less?! The professors I meet here think very highly of Indian students- they know we have the brains and the ability to work very hard. But the only thing we lack is the confidence that we are good and the ability to sell ourselves to the world! I remember this one time, I was reading the resume of one of my American friends and he had actually mentioned the job he did as a lab assistant helping students take printouts as "work experience". I thought it was kinda silly- what skill is involved in that?! But he told me employers appreciate it coz it shows you've had experience in customer service, troubleshooting and people-skills! Any work is good work! Imagine that !!

I just read all I've typed in the lines above and I realize that there's not much coherence to this post. But I guess all I'm trying to say is- maybe it's time we start taking our Indianness seriously. Maybe it's time we learn to be proud of our roots and our capabilities and our strengths. And learn to declare that proudly to the world instead of waiting for them to find out on their own! And once we learn to do that for ourselves, we can hopefully develop the confidence to get into the system and actually change it- fight the poverty, decrease the corruption, not rely on reservations to get a good education.. And hopefully that will be the day this brain drain will stop. People will not think twice before returning to their country. And they will shake out of their complacence and at least attempt to elect the right government to lead the country. And that will mark the beginning of true progress.

Jai Hind !!

The good part of a rainy summer..

2009-07-26T16:33:00.012-04:00

I spent a good part of the last post cursing the unpredictable Rochester weather and the boring summer. But to think on the positive side, there are two advantages of this weather too- Firstly, I am cooking a lot nowadays. Well, that is a good thing because those who know me decently well know that until about a year ago, I couldn't make anything except tea, coffee and fried egg. Because I was coming to the US and had to live here with strangers, my mom forcefully taught me to cook a few simple dishes. But I was always like a fish out of water in the kitchen; cooking was always an ordeal! Moving into a house with three guys as roommates and no coursework gave me the time and desire to at least attempt to develop my expertise in the kitchen. And wonder of wonders, I discovered that cooking could be quite enjoyable! And what's more, I could actually be good at it !! :) Besides, it's a known fact that there's no better way to lift your spirits than good food! So the past few days have seen me make pretty successful attempts at Ragda Patties, Gobi Manchurian, Thalipeeth, Indian Chinese, North Indian fare and many other dishes that I otherwise would have stayed 10 feet away from. Of course, it's not that I cook fancy stuff everyday but now I've reached a stage where if I have to rake up a meal for 5-6 people, I at least don't get all nervous and jittery at the thought of it. And that is definitely something my mom and I are proud of!

I think now is a good time to mention a few people I credit this new-found skill to. Of course, a major source of ideas and recipes is my mom. I think we spend at least 10-15 minutes discussing what I cooked and what she cooked everyday! Apart from that, I also vehemently hunt around for good food blogs nowadays and this has been quite a revelation actually! I cannot believe the number of Indian women settled in various parts of the US who are actively running food blogs. Now these are all young, working, married women who have kids and a husband and maybe even in-laws to look after. And I don't even know if they earn any sort of revenue from these blogs, apart from probably Adsense. But in spite of that, they regularly write about the food they cooked, add some pretty yummy pictures and conduct events to encourage fellow bloggers to come up with innovative recipes. Quite a strong network they have out there! Of course, you can always tell if the author is someone from the US when she uses cilantro instead of coriander and cayenne pepper instead of red chili powder !! ;) While I do wish to thank all of them for their contributions, there are some who I am particularly fond of:

1) Naina's recipes: Naina is actually my neighbor from Pune who has lived in Rochester for seven years and moved to Seattle just a few months ago. She has some pretty innovative recipes. I have yet to try out her authentic Italian fare though.
2) Aayi's recipes: Now this is one incredible lady. She writes about the most complex stuff as well as the most mundane, every-day recipes. The thing I like best about her is that she cooks a lot of Konkani fare which is pretty simple and easy on the tastebuds too- afterall, who wants heavy, fat-enriched food everyday!
3) Manjula's Kitchen: I guess most students in the US know about her website. She puts up videos of her recipes and though her website is not very exhaustive, it's good for some of the North Indian dishes.
4) Hooked On Heat: I love her site mainly for the amazing tempting pictures she puts up! And she also has some very interesting recipes.

Okay, now enough of food stuff !! :P The second good thing about having to stay at home because of a rainy Rochester summer is that I get to watch a lot of movies nowadays !! You already know how fond I am of movies, but the funny thing is that until now, I have seen a lot of Hindi films but have somehow missed out on some of the most famous of English movies! And PD is a major fan of all Hollywood flicks. So we invariably end up hunting for movies on IMDB, download them and watch them. Add to that, one of our professors gave us his old TV and we bought an S-Video cable last week, so now we hook up our laptops to the TV too! Imagine what a heavenly combo that is- good food and a good movie !! :):)

The past few weeks of movie-watching have made me realize how much I've have missed out on all these years! There are some pretty incredible movies out there, which can haunt you for days on end! And you can always tell if I've liked a movie depending on whether I'm awake or not at the end of it! What happens is this- we usually see these movies in the night while having dinner and I am already pretty tired coz of school the whole day. So it is only a really good and gripping movie that manages to keep me awake all through it! :P Like I saw Shawshank Redemption (yup, I was seeing it for the first time! :P) till 2 am but it was alllll worth it! That movie is one of the most incredible movies I've ever seen. That's the best thing about Hollywood flicks actually- they don't glorify the "hero"; he's not some brilliant chap who set out to do great things. He's just an ordinary guy who made the most of the cards he was dealt with! And the whole movie is just about capturing his experiences and thoughts- and that's what make them such extraordinary movies!

Of course, what blows you away is the expertise of the film-makers and technicians- they delve into such intricacies of their film's characters, it's almost as if they're living each of their lives! Like take a movie like Wall-E- the story of this film is so painfully simple but you look at the animation and you actually feel for Wall-E and Eve. You don't think of them as just cartoon characters. Same goes for Cars- I don't know about you, but I found the idea of making a delighfully cute film about a racing car lost in a small village where he finds the true meaning of friendship to be pretty innovative. Talking about innovation, I saw Memento today and I have no words for a movie like that! I haven't seen Ghajini so I'm not going to compare the two. But I do believe that even a master like Aamir Khan would not have been able to capture the true essence of the film. This is probably why Murudagoss had to resort to making the hero seem like a violent, angry guy seeking revenge. Memento is hardly what you can call violent! That is another thing about Hollywood films- everything is so understated in them. Most of the emotions the characters are going through- pain, grief, joy, guilt, pride, jealousy- are either explicit because of the dialogues and screenplay, or are left to the viewer's imagination. Unfortunately Indian films resort to very strong display of emotions, everything is very in-your-face and that sometimes does little to excite the viewer or make him think. But I guess that has more to do with the way we are- we tend to be more gregarious and loud than the Americans and so this behavior is reflected in our movies too. (Interesting view on it here by my friend Ketaki).

Of course, I don't love all the movies I see. Like, I saw The Hangover the other day and it is the dumbest, ickiest movie I have ever seen. Why would anyone make a movie like that!?!

So anyway, going by the trend, I'm looking forward to loads of yummy dishes being cooked at home and even better movies being watched.. :) And that sure does make it a wonderful summer! :) Oh and by the way, I saw Harry Potter in the theater last week and it somehow was such a letdown! I think what is happening is- people's expectations of the movie have risen so far that the directors are finding it hard to live up to it! I was specially expecting a good movie from David Yates, given that he did a fantastic job of the previous movie. But this somehow just didn't have that magical touch. I can't pinpoint to exactly what it was, but that awesome feeling you get after watching an HP movie was missing! I honestly hope the last two are brilliant- otherwise it would be a wayyy too disappointing end to the series...

Boredom x Time = A Tag !!

2009-07-23T20:35:00.004-04:00

It's been one of those long, excruciatingly boring weeks with nothing much to do except go to school at 9 in the morning and return at 4 in the evening and try to fill the time in between with a bit of thesis work and other random things. The weather's been a major contributing factor to the inertia- that's probably one of the worst things about Rochester- it's unpredictable weather! I mean, it's summer for God's sake, it's not supposed to rain the whole day !!! :P

So anyway, lack of creative insights has forced me to resort to completing one of my long-overdue tags. It's those "My 25" things doing the rounds of Facebook, where you're supposed to write 25 random things about yourself. My friend had tagged me a long time ago, but I was a little wary about firstly, writing things about myself since I usually am not so self-observant, and secondly, writing personal things on Facebook- being a public forum and all.. (Our Career Services people scared me in the first quarter by telling me a lot of employers use FB accounts to find out more about their prospective employees and I know I have a private FB account, but nonetheless...) I've attempted a similar tag a while ago, so I'm going to try and not repeat the things I mentioned there. So, here I go with twenty-five random things about myself. Read on if you're as bored as I am-

1) I love travelling by trains, they're more fun than air or road travel.

2) I get put off by smokers. I remember when I was in COEP, Gauri and I used to yell at Akshay and Pranjal whenever they went to one of their "tapris".. I love them both otherwise, but the moment they start smoking, I somehow don't want to be around them.

3) I am pretty non-judgmental about people otherwise, and don't discriminate against anyone- regardless of actions, beliefs, ethnicity. I'm a very strong believer in the "to each his own" philosophy.

4) One of the things I love about the US is the fact that I can travel a lot, something I missed out on in India. If I had the money, I would travel to a new place every weekend!

5) I used to suck at cooking until a few months ago, used to be a nervous wreck every time I was in the kitchen! But I am turning out to be a pretty good cook off late. I try out loads of new stuff and fortunately, most of it comes out well! A major source of my recipes is cooking blogs and my mom!

6) I am not too fond of chocolate and I hate bhindi !! (Yeah, gasp all you want; I'm used to it !! :P) I absolutely delightfully love vanilla icecream though! I could eat it everyday! Same goes with gobi manchurian and bhel puri !! :)

7) I hate my hair. I wish I could change it. I am always wary of going to new hair salons because people invariably give the most shocking reactions when they see my hair. Why don't they realize that I can see them gasp?! :P Oh and when I was in school, I was called "chidya ka ghonsla"..

8) I miss my life in Doha- it was a conservative place but I had the best time of my life there..

9) Writing is also one of the things closest to my heart. I feel very restless when something I've written isn't up to my expectations. The part I loved the most in those English exams in school was the essay writing section- so what if I have to write on "A Day on the Railway Station..." !!

10) I am a pretty talkative person when I have the right company. Otherwise I can be the most silent person; you won't even notice I am there..

11) My ideal outings with friends is going someplace and having interesting conversations about randon things under the sun. Or else, doing silly things like playing Dumb-C, Uno, etc and laughing like crazy! I am not at all a big fan of friends getting together only to drink and act stupid all night long!

12) I haven't had a really intense and intelligent conversation in a really long time! I wish Anup was in the US..

13) I am not a lot into any sports, though I do like watching cricket and tennis. I felt really really really bad when India lost the 2003 World Cup though. I think I wrote one of my most emotional articles then.

14) I love learning new languages. Though German will always remain closest to my heart. I am desperately waiting to visit Germany some day and do an advanced German language course.

15) I think I'm becoming more and more like my mom nowadays.. Which is a good and bad thing..

16) I take friendship very seriously. I have a few friends and I may not call or email them every week, but I can do anything for them! I despise people who sweet-talk with everyone, pretending to be their dearest friends but turn away when their friends need them the most.

17) I am not much of a phone person. I prefer communicating face-to-face or through email or IM. I go blank when I have to "chat" with people on the phone..

18) 2004 was probably the craziest year of my life. I did a lot of things that year which I am proud of and which I regret even today.

19) I am generally a very optimistic person. I tend to look at the pluses more than the minuses. That is probably why I could successfully get out of some of the crap I've faced in life.

20) I would love to dabble in film-making some day. My ideal job would actually be engineer by day and film-maker by night. I love the creative process of making films- right from conceptualization to scriptwriting to shooting. It's a perfect blend of writing, photography, languages, travelling- all the things I love!

21) Design of Experiments is probably the first engineering subject I love so much. If I could do a Ph.D in DOE, I would..

22) I hated thermodynamics when in COEP. I simply never understood it..

23) I love people with nice, full smiles that twinkle in their eyes.

24) I canot stand dirty kitchens and bathrooms.

25) I get bored of staying in the same place for too long. Which is why I wanted to move out of Pune for my engineering. I am already bored of Rochester though.. I wish I get a job where I have to travel a lot..

Anyone who hasn't done this and who needs some sort of motivation to update their blogs, consider yourself tagged !! :)

It's done !!!! :):)

2009-07-08T14:42:00.008-04:00

Who would've thought that less than 24 hours after writing the previous post, I'd have bought a car !!! :):):)

Yup, it's finally done !! We now have a 1999 Nissan Altima that will be ours on Friday, July 10, 2009 !! :):) It doesn't have a sunroof (sob sob :(() but it is awesome all the same.. :)

We saw it yesterday, liked it, showed it to the mechanic this morning, he okayed it except for a few glitches here and there (expected of a 10-year old car). The dealer is going to fix them in any case, so hopefully no issues there. Once all that is done, we'll do the registration on Friday and drive it home.. :) (Will post some pictures then..)

I know I'm putting in a lot of smileys while writing this, and I am really really happy too, but there is this weird tension at the back of my mind- did we make the right decision? should we have looked at other cars? or maybe thought a bit more? I think these are valid apprehensions- after all, this is the first BIG thing I am buying! A CAR for cryin' out loud !! That's HUGE! Add to that, I'm buying it on my own, without my parents. They left the decision completely to us coz after all, we were the ones test driving the cars and we were going to use it ultimately! It feels a little scary to be given that kind of responsibility! But I guess it had to begin some time..

I can only hope and pray that I've made the right choice.... Until then, no more looking up postings on Craigslist and Cars.com, no more calling dealers and weird car owners, no more fixing appointments and looking up directions on Google Maps! Gosh, life is sure gonna feel empty! :):);)

The Car Hunt

2009-07-07T15:34:00.004-04:00

The story goes thus -

PD and his roommate bought a 96 Toyota Corolla (what else!) in November 2007.
The car was a steal- low miles, great condition, well within budget.
All was great for 19 months. (:):))
But. All good things come to an end.
So did this.
A fateful trip on one day and a (terribly!) overheated engine and from then on, everything went downhill.
Thousands of dollars spent and loads of frustrated days, but things didn't improve.
Until finally, they decided to sell the car. Depression.
But this was easier done than said !!
On Day One, we put up an ad on Craigslist and half an hour later a guy was on the phone demanding that he'd buy the car tomorrow (negotiated the price a bit, but was expected!).
On Day Two, the car was test driven (phew!) and sold !!
PD's roommate bought a new car since he got an internship in the Village of Wolcott.
But life in Rochester is difficult without a car due to the terrible public transportation.
Still, we managed somehow.
But then finally, something (happy) happened which made buying a car imperative for PD too.
But he didn't have enough savings (thanks to repair jobs on the Corolla!)
So PD and I decided to pool in and buy a car together.
And so from June 1, 2009, the car hunt began.
And...it still continues.

We don't have a lot of demands- just a non-American car (read: Honda, Toyota, Mazda or Nissan) which has not more than 120k miles on it, is in good running condition, has well-maintained interiors and is less than $4000 !! (Well, I did have a CD-player and a sunroof on the list initially, but after seeing what's out there in the market, I had to leave those for when I buy my brand new car !! :(( Kidding !!) But honestly, in the past one month, we have seen close to thirty cars and only one has come even close to the final stage! That itself gives you an idea of how frustrating this has been. The hunt still continues and hopefully I shall have positive news in the next few weeks..

But if I were to look on the brighter side, then this has been a brilliant learning experience too. I, for one, have never been much into cars. I've admired their engineering of course, being a mechanical engineer, but I definitely am not the types who can rattle off their specs, given a car's make, model and year! These are some of my "lessons learnt" -

It may sound like a typically "Indian" thing to do, but never trust American cars- especially with the economy in doldrums! For a grad student hunting for a used car, it has got to be Toyotas and Hondas all the way! We have included Nissan and Mazda only because we haven't been able to find a decent car within our budget.
Craigslist is going to throw thousand cars at you. If any car seems too good to be true, then it probably is !! For example, if someone says they're selling a 1998 Toyota Camry with 106k miles on it and in excellent running condition for $2500, then there's probably something majorly wrong with the car! Good guideline to use is the Kelly Blue Book.
There are these ads you'll find on Craigslist for cars being sold at lower prices. If contacted, a common story told by most sellers is that they're going through a divorce and so want to sell the car ASAP. Then they go on to say that they'll ship the car to you through eBay Motors (shipping included in the cost of the car!). You have ten days to drive it and if you don't like it, your money will be refunded! Absolute and total scam!
It is always good to educate yourself about what to look for when you first see the car. PD's dad found this simple superb link which has an excellent description of how to look for potential problems- things like the oil levels, transmission problems, etc, which even a person with basic knowledge about car components can do. I was illiterate about these things at first, but now I can proudly say that I know how to check the engine oil levels or ensure the timing belt of a car has been changed or detect weird sounds from the muffler..
In a place like Rochester, where it snows for eight months of the year, it is imperative that your car have good tires, good brakes and little or no rust, coz otherwise you're in for big trouble! These are little things which may not seem important at first, but seem crucial once you actually start using your car.
The interiors of a car can reveal a lot about how well-maintained it is. Coz an owner who has spills all over the seats or didn't bother to use floor mats in his car probably didn't bother to change the oil every 3000 miles!
Similarly, if dealing with a dealer, make sure to speak to him as much as possible about the car. Ask him all the info he has about it- maintainence, any changed components, since when is he trying to sell the car etc. Dealers usually quote a price much higher than expected, coz they know customers are going to bargain. But if a dealer readily agrees to negotiation in price, then there's probably something he's hiding. Also, one thing I've noticed- a friendly and approachable dealer is a much safer bet than a grumpy guy who just wants to fix the deal and get the car out of his shop.
Before finalizing anything, make sure to check the car's records through a CARFAX report. It reveals a lot about the car's history- accidents, major repair works, past owners, inspection reports etc. I don't think they have such a system in India, but this is one must-do before buying a used car.
And finally, regardless of how good you think the car is, it is always a good idea to have it inspected by a mechanic. We once nearly finalized on a Honda Accord- all seemed good, the dealer was a friendly chap too. We showed it to a mechanic and he told us there was a small crack in the rear tires, the AC condenser was leaking, and a bearing near the driver's seat was loose! One good thing about the incident was that we got hold of an excellent mechanic (we went to him coz he was the only one open at 6 pm!) who did a thorough job and actually took the time to explain every detail to us.

So you see, buying a car in the US is not easy. It is a long and tedious procedure and can get quite irritating at times! But I am happy that I am at least getting gyaan about cars in the process. Now to be fair, I know of guys here who're mechanical engineers no less, and don't even know the difference between a manual and automatic transmission! And there is one I met who didn't know how to open the bonnet of his car! He was looking at PD and me in awe when we were examining his engine !! So I am a lot better compared to them! After all, I worked on bonnets for eight months when I was in TATA Motors !! :) But all in all, this has definitely been worth it!

Now if only I'd get my car with a CD player and sunroof soon enough !!! :):)

Back to the world of board games

2009-07-03T18:01:00.006-04:00

I PLAYED SCRABBLE TODAY !!! AFTER YEARS !!! :):)

Well yes, the thought of having played Scrabble today, for real and not some animated computer version of it, makes me feel really really happy! I've never really been a fan of computer games- never really tried any of them except the occasional NFS or Counterstrike. I do have a lot of friends who are literally addicted to some of these games, willing to spend whole weekends killing the "enemy", collecting health and buying weapons. Though I don't have anything against these people (I try to remain unbiased! :P), I somehow never really got any of that adrenaline rush from playing them! I did always love board games though- like the good old Scrabble, Monopoly, even patte (though I'm not really good at any patte games :P)

But these smart ass computer guys (I've always hated them !! :P) always manage to come up with e-versions of games, and to attract players, they add all these special effects and sounds to them, making the whole thing look very chic and stylized. I know, because I keep getting updates on Orkut and FB about someone looking for "a purple poker chip" in Mafia Wars (duh !!) and scoring 76584 points in WordTwist !! And then there's this game called Crazy Taxi and Texas Hold 'em Poker (or somesuchthing !! :P) Now imagine- if you're going to keep people busy with racing taxis around the place, where is there time to even have a conversation, leave alone play a board game !!

Even I had completely forgotten the pleasure one can get from playing a real, real game, until I went for a friend's engagement last month. That is when I played Pictionary for the very first time !! (Yes, I'm equally surprised I hadn't played it before!) And I cannot even explain how much fun it was! I sucked at the first few words, but then came the big one- Obamania- and you may call it bragging but I did manage to pull that one off pretty well !! Of course, it helped that we had brilliant players- we didn't just split the word and draw each bit, but we actually built a story around each of them! Sample this- We gave this guy in the other team the word "penance" and he went on to show a guy who rapes a girl and then (coz he feels guilty about it) decides to leave the city and move to the khets of Punjab. While sowing seeds in the fields, he spots God standing right in the middle of the field. That is when he decides to sit under a tree and meditate for the rest of his life !! Well, the other team did guess the word eventually, but you can only imagine the hilarity of the situation! I really wish I had that notebook we drew all our words in- It's worth saving for the sake of posterity! I really wonder if our kids will know what drawing with an actual pen on a real page made of paper pulp is ! :P

Anyway, I was bored after a long day of thesising last week and that's when I spotted the box of Scrabble by my bedside. One of my friends had given it to me when she left Rochester last September, but I somehow never actually got around to playing it even once! This time though, I dragged PD to play with me (he's another computer game addict !! hmmmpppfff :P:P) And I cannot tell you how much fun it was! The first time around, we came up with the usual 3-4 letter words kike hat and cat, but the second time it was brilliant! We managed to build some pretty unusual words and so what if we tweaked the rules a bit too (He allowed me Rehab and I allowed him Prez!) The sheer joy of being away from the glaring computer screen and playing something for real was brilliant! Scrabble is definitely going to remain on my list of favorites for a while! I am still in the process of persuading PD to give Pictionary a shot. And while I am at it, I plan to treat myself to a 4th of July gift- the original UNO card game !!! (Boy, I used to LOVE that game as a kid !!! :):))

And well, after we were done with the game, I was so happy that I actually clicked a snap of the board! :) Here's to more such evenings! :):)

The Falls- An Experience

2009-06-29T13:28:00.007-04:00

There are some places people (more so, tourists) typically associate with the US- the Grand Canyon, Florida and Universal Studios, New York, Los Angeles and more importantly- the Niagara Falls. Every student wants to visit them the moment they land on American soil. Every parent who comes to the US for their son/daughter's graduation wants to see the Falls. And everyone who has ever been there will agree that it is an experience of a lifetime!

One of the "cool" things about coming to RIT for my MS was that firstly, I was in THE "New York" and people thought that was amazing, not realizing that Rochester is as New York as say, Latur is Mumbai !! And secondly, I was a 90 minute ride away from Niagara Falls, and THAT was most definitely amazing !! :) And sure enough, that was our first tourist destination, thanks to the wonderful $10 trip sponsored by the ISS. I cannot even put into words, the feeling I felt when I saw the first glimpse of the Falls from our bus. Spectacular is an understatement! It's one of those places which leave you mesmerized; you cannot help feel amazed at the wonders of Mother Nature. And then come the rides- the Maid of the Mist and the Caves of the Wind! Any visit to Niagara is incomplete without doing both of these. My roommates' parents had come down last month for their graduation and we took them to the Falls. The look of exhilaration on their faces after the Maid of the Mist ride was priceless! I almost thought they were going to cry! One of the mom's also commented- "I had been wanting to see the beauty of Niagara for months. Now this visit to the US feels complete!". As expected, they also took the blue and yellow raincoats and the slippers back to India with them, as souvenirs! :)

Hmmm...anyway, there was no real point of writing this post except that I was going through the photo album and felt really happy and so felt like blogging about it! :) Oh, and I really like this snap of the Falls that I've taken- looks so beautiful in a picture, imagine what the real thing looks like! I can't wait for my parents to get here... :):)

And here is a glimpse of the Maid of the Mist boat from the Observatory

People say it looks even better from the Canada side- I honestly don't know how that is possible! Hopefully, I'll make that trip soon enough and find out ! :)

Music that binds

2009-06-23T13:06:00.003-04:00

It is often, very difficult to describe the connection between two people. More often than not, ties that bind people go through a constant metamorphosis until that stability, a comfort zone, is reached. This is true even for people integral to your life's fabric, people you interact with on a day to day basis. In this case, I am referring to my mother.

There are, of course, a gazillion things that bind us together- we have, after all, spent 24 years in each others' company !! :) But there a few things that I have and always will associate with "us"- things that have defined our relationship over the years. And one of them is Sa Re Ga Ma Pa. And before you shriek out in horror, let me clarify that I am NOT referring to the Himesss and Bappi da version (Aap ne ye jo gayi hai, bahut badhiya gayi hai !! LOL !!) I am talking about the more authentic, real, Marathi version that airs on Alpha TV. And though I do hate the channel for dishing out "creations" like Asambhav and Ya Sukhanno Ya, I do sincerely believe that it has done the Television and the Music industry proud by managing to maintain the sanctity of the show over the past so many years.

So anyway, Sa Re Ga Ma Pa has always been this one show we both saw together. We stayed up till late at night to see it, saw the repeat telecasts over and over again, much to the chagrin of my dad and sister, and invariably sang along in our loud, slightly-out-of-tune voices !! Let's just say that it was our two nights of bliss- where music took over studies and work! So as was inevitable, this is the part of our daily routine I miss the most in the US. She does keep giving me updates over the telephone- who is competing, who the judges are, who sang what, who got voted out etc etc. But it's not the real thing!

But today was different. I happened to call her at the same time the episode was being aired and though she usually refuses to talk to me during such "critical" times, today she decided she could speak to me while watching (note the order of importance :P). And that's when one of our favorite all time classics by Asha Bhosale came on. My mom immediately put the phone near the TV's speakers, all conversation came to a halt and for the next three minutes, we simply listened to this wonderful classic. And then out of nowhere, we started singing along too! (Now this was okay for my mom coz she was within the confines of our home, but I was sitting in my Grad Assistant's office- thank God no professor walked in! :P)

It was just like old times !!

Hats off to the maestro whose voice still manages to bind hearts that are 8000 miles away!

45 lessons

2009-06-23T09:41:00.004-04:00

Got this forward from my dad this morning. Now this is a little (actually, completely) philosophical, and it is not in the nature of this blog or its owner to sermonize on a routine basis. But in the current difficult times, this little forward did make a lot of sense to me. So, I had to post it here. Read it and give it a thought! :)

PS- I've highlighted the ones I liked best of the lot !!

Written By Regina Brett, 90 years old, of The Plain Dealer, Cleveland , Ohio :

"To celebrate growing older, I once wrote the 45 lessons life taught me. It is the most-requested column I've ever written. My odometer rolled over to 90 in August, so here is the column once more:"

1. Life isn't fair, but it's still good.
2. When in doubt, just take the next small step.
3. Life is too short to waste time hating anyone.
4. Your job won't take care of you when you are sick. Your friends and parents will. Stay in touch.
5. Pay off your credit cards every month.
6. You don't have to win every argument. Agree to disagree.
7. Cry with someone.. It's more healing than crying alone.
8. It's OK to get angry with God. He can take it.
9. Save for retirement starting with your first paycheck.
10. When it comes to chocolate, resistance is futile.
11. Make peace with your past so it won't screw up the present.
12. It's OK to let your children see you cry.
13. Don't compare your life to others. You have no idea what their journey is all about.
14. If a relationship has to be a secret, you shouldn't be in it.
15. Everything can change in the blink of an eye. But don't worry; God never blinks.
16. Take a deep breath. It calms the mind..
17. Get rid of anything that isn't useful, beautiful or joyful.
18. Whatever doesn't kill you really does make you stronger.
19. It's never too late to have a happy childhood. But the second one is up to you and no one else.
20. When it comes to going after what you love in life, don't take no for an answer.
21. Burn the candles, use the nice sheets, wear the fancy lingerie. Don't save it for a special occasion. Today is special.
22. Over prepare, then go with the flow.
23. Be eccentric now. Don't wait for old age to wear purple.
24. The most important sex organ is the brain.
25. No one is in charge of your happiness but you.
26. Frame every so-called disaster with these words ''In five years, will this matter?".
27. Always choose life.
28. Forgive everyone everything.
29. What other people think of you is none of your business.
30. Time heals almost everything. Give time, time.
31. However good or bad a situation is, it will change.
32. Don't take yourself so seriously. No one else does.
33. Believe in miracles.
34. God loves you because of who God is, not because of anything you did or didn't do.
35. Don't audit life. Show up and make the most of it now.
36. Growing old beats the alternative -- dying young.
37. Your children get only one childhood.
38. All that truly matters in the end is that you loved.
39. Get outside every day. Miracles are waiting everywhere.
40. If we all threw our problems in a pile and saw everyone else's, we'd grab ours back.
41. Envy is a waste of time. You already have all you need.
42. The best is yet to come.
43. No matter how you feel, get up, dress up and show up.
44. Yield.

45. Life isn't tied with a bow, but it's still a gift.

Copy-Pasting a Blogpost

2009-04-28T07:22:00.005-04:00

I was reading through the blogs of some of the friends on my blogroll, just to catch up on what they've been up to. Been a while since I spoke to some of them. And I came across this post written by a guy I know in Pune. I was reading his post- which was really small, but brilliant, an analogy of sorts. At that point, I realized that I had read a very similar post on the blog of another senior of mine from COEP. Just to check out, I opened her blog and hunted for that post.

And horror of horrors, it was the exact same post! And by exact, I mean word-for-word...

Now obviously, my COEP senior had posted this about a year before this other guy, so it's obvious who used Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V !! :P And having been a Masters student in the US for more than six months now, I am pretty sensitive to plagiarism issues! (Lol!) No seriously, I didn't like what he'd done. In spite of that, I decided to give him a fair chance- maybe he wasn't aware of blogging rules. So I pointed it out to him in his comments section. Even linked it to the url of the original blog post. I thought he'd accept his mistake and either remove his post or mention the source as an "inspiration". At least that was the gracious thing to do!

When I checked back a day later, he had deleted by comment and the post was still there as it is- without any modifications! Furthermore, he was actually receiving applauding comments from his other friends about how insightful his post was and how clever of him to think up of such an analogy !!!

Now there are two things to this- the guy picks up a post from another source, without changing even a preposition in it (the only thing he did was italicize a few words... :P:P). And to top it off, he doesn't change it even after someone tells him it's not his original work! Well, he's an engineering student, and I know that as a group, we don't think too much of "GT-ing" our sheets or copying journals, but that is for convenience (;-)) This is pure plagiarism only coz he couldn't find something smart to write on his blog!

I know most people who blog do it for pleasure. Our posts are not protected by copyright laws or licenses. But as bloggers, there is an unwritten code of conduct we all follow, and that is to never Ctrl+C, Ctrl+V another person's post without permission!

I hope that guy reads this post and realizes the mistake he's committed !! :P:P

(Interesting cartoon taken from here)

PS: I'm not mentioning either the guy's blog link or the link to the original post because I don't want to embarrass him. But I sincerely do think he should do something about it!

Song and Tag

2009-04-24T19:20:00.004-04:00

I've been wanting to get back to blogging since ages. But most of the times, there were either too many things to write about, or absolutely nothing I could think of!

So when I finally couldn't take it any more, I did the next best thing a person who hasn't blogged for more than 5 months does- tagged myself !!! :D Well, I saw this really interesting tag on a blog I frequent quite often and thought it was an interesting idea... So here goes-

Here are the rules:
1. Put your music player on Shuffle mode.
2. For each question, press the next button to get your answer.
3. Write the song name no matter what it is.
4. After you've answered all of the questions, tag 5 other people and let them know they've been tagged.

1. If someone says "Is this okay?", you say:
Ae kaash ke hum hosh mein ab
Ane na payein...

2. What would best describe your personality?
Ek Haseena Thi..... (From Karzzzz no less... :D:D)

3. What do you like in a guy/girl?
C'mon c'mom c'mon,
We're gonna make it home tonight...

4. How do you feel today?
Don't wanna be an American Idiot,
Don't want a nation under the new media,
And can you hear the sound of hysteria?
The subliminal mind f*** America
(Dear US Visa people, It's just a tag, I really don't mean this !! Sincerely, Suparna :P)

5. What is your life's purpose?
Ashayein khile dil ki
Ummedein hasein dil ki
Ab mushkil nahin kuch bhi... (Waah waah !!!)

6. What do your friends think of you?
Someday, somehow
I'm gonna make it all right but not right now
I know you're wondering when

7. What do you think of your parents?
Teri aakhon ke
Chipe dard mein,
Aasoon ki tarah
Mehfuz hoon... (Oh man.... noooooo !!)

8. What do you think about very often?
Mitwaaaa.... Kahein dhadkanein tujh se kya !!!

9. What is 2+2?
Urvashi !!! (Hahahaha... )

10. What do you think of your best friend?
Dil Chahta hai...
Kabhi na beetein chamkile din..
Dil Chahta hai...
Hum na rahein kabhi yaaron ke bin.. (Yayyyy...)

11. What do you think of the person you like?
Forever, we will be
Together, you and me
Oh n when I hold ya, nothing can compare
With all of my heart, you know Ill always be, right there..
(Oh I so mean this !! :))

12. What is your life story?
So don't, don't, don't mess my hair
If all you do is fake it
Don't, don't, don't say you care,
Coz I could never shake it
Don't, don't, don't mess with me
(Oooo I like this... :))

13. What do you want to be when you grow up?
What's going on?!?! (Seriously, what IS going on!?)

14. What do you think of when you see the person you like?
Hey Shona !!!! (Ha! Too much ho raha hai ab !!)

15. What do your parents think of you?
Tanha Dil,
Tanha safar,
Dhunde tujhe,
Phir kyon nazar...

16. What will you dance to at your wedding?
Rangeela re !!! (Now this is the best one !!! :D)

17. What will they play at your funeral?
Why'd you have to go and make things so complicated?
I see the way you're acting like you're somebody else
Gets me frustrated
Life's like this you
You fall and you crawl and you break
And you take what you get, and you turn it into
Honestly, you promised me
I'm never gonna find you fake it
No no no

18. What is your hobby/interest?
Hum jo chal ne lage
Chal ne lage hai yeh raaste
Aahha manzil se behatar
Lagne lage hai yeh raaste

19. What is your biggest secret?
You are the dancing queen, young and sweet, only seventeen
Dancing queen, feel the beat from the tambourine
You can dance, you can jive, having the time of your life
See that girl, watch that scene, dig in the dancing queen
(Haila!)

20. What do you think of your friends?
You were my strength when I was weak
You were my voice when I couldn't speak
You were my eyes when I couldn't see
You saw the best there was in me

Lifted me up when I couldn't reach
You gave me faith 'cause you believed
I'm everything I am
Because you loved me...
(Senti senti... sob sob... :(()

21. What should you post this as?
O Humdum suniyo re !!! :D

22. What do you think about this tag?
Tak tana tana tandoori nights !!!!
(Ok, now THIS is has got to be the best one !!!)

And I tag all the people who haven't blogged for months like me and need a comeback post !! :) Sing away... :)

All it takes is Visa Power !!

2008-10-07T10:48:00.009-04:00

Came across this cartoon strip a few days ago. It's been doing the rounds for quite a while now, but is apt for anybody harboring dreams of studying in a US University and getting the all-so-important ticket to the land of dreams- the US Visa !! (As Jiggy says in Jaane Tu...- Sab ko nahin milta !!)

Well, I'm at Stage 14 currently... Phew! So much for dreams...

Making sense of you

2008-10-06T08:44:00.005-04:00

I was watching this film- "In her Shoes", a few days ago. (Yeah yeah, I know, Cameron Diaz looks hot. Can we move on now!? :-P) Anyway, there's this one scene where Rose (Toni Collette) and Simon (Mark Feuerstein) are dining at a sushi joint and Simon asks Rose about the things that make sense of her as a person. Things without which her life wouldn't be complete.

That dialogue set my mind thinking. How often have we thought about the things that help us make sense of our life?! They are such ingrained parts of our lives that actually listing them out requires some thought; it's not something that is spontaneous.

Anyway, when I decided to do it, what was interesting was- the stuff I came up with was not what I'm necessarily the best at. (Of course, this is assuming that there are things I'm the best at, which is well...not quite true! ;-)) Anyway, these are things I just love deeply, regardless of the fact that there are people in the world who're a lot better than me at it. Infact, it is this very fact that drives me to be better at them. Which is why, in essence, they help me make sense of me!

Ok, now even I don't know if I've been able to express what I want to say correctly, so I'm just going to move on to this "list" I've been talking about for way too long...

1) Writing: Which is why I have a blog in the first place, so obviously tops my list. Again, I know I'm not the best writer. I've read blogs of so many random people who're absolutely brilliant at putting thoughts to words, it makes me jealous at times. But at the same time, I know I do possess moderate talent in this area (Oh, the modesty! :-D) And so, I hate it when I don't do a good job of a writing assignment. Like, when I can't complete a blogpost the way I wanted to, or when I can't edit a friend's SOP well enough, or when I write an article for a mag and it doesn't get published. When I was in school, I used to get disappointed if I didn't win an essay writing competition. Or when I got a 5.5 in AWM in my GRE, it was the greatest day of my life coz even though I had friends who'd got better scores than me, I'd topped them in the writing section. (This post was written then.)

2) Photography: Again, I am decently good in this area. But it actually bothers me when someone comments on how silly a photograph clicked by me turned out to be (even if it's true). Or when my roommate is able to capture a better frame than me. Or when I can't do that photography workshop I've been waiting for, just because the stupid photographer relocated his studio !! :-P

3) Films: Not going to say much about this, except that I don't mean "films" in the typical frivolous fashion imagined by most. The connection goes way deep and making it all come together is an ongoing quest.

4) When I was in COEP, it was Fervor- our department's annual techfest. Now while this may seem a stupid choice, my classmates and their friends know how much this event meant to me. It there's one single thing I'm proud of, in my engineering life- it's this. And though this is not a lifelong association, it gives me an amazing sort of happiness knowing that Fervor saw it's best and worst days when I was a part of it.

I guess that's it. That completes my list. It's a good exercise to practice actually; could even work as a blogtag. Question though- wouldn't it be so much better if the work we did found a place in this list!? Or is it stupid to even expect someone to say that operations research helps them make sense of their life?! Or, maybe that's not such a bad idea after all..

PS: If anyone does attempt this, do let me know what you came up with.. Would be interesting to know...

Being held at gunpoint right now..

2008-09-26T10:17:00.005-04:00

Firstly, my apologies for not writing for this long. But believe me, the kinda month I've had, it's a wonder I even found time to write right now! But more on that later. I have midterms coming up and my dear friend P chooses this very moment to tag me. And added to that is the fact that the tag is a rather lovey-dovey type. Which is not my favourite topic to write on. Anyway, I have to complete the tag coz I stand to lose quite a bit if I don't. So with a sufficiently large amount of trepidation, I begin-

Q. What would you love the most in your lover?
Ans: His totally arbit sense of humour. His awesome smile. His ability to understand the little things that matter to me (big point)

Q. What would you do with a billion dollars?
Ans: Invest for sure. (I'm my dad's beti bhai !! And he's big on investments!) And build the most amazing farmhouse for my parents. And...donate a part of it.

Q. What is love?
Ans: I honestly don't know.

Q. Would you fall in love with your best friend?
Ans: According to me, that's the best kind of love. I belong to the Kuch Kuch Hota Hai line of thought.

Q. Which is more blessed, loving someone or being loved by someone?
And: I guess a bit of both is always good !!

Q. How long should you wait for someone you really love?
Ans: Till someone else comes along.. ;-)

Q. Is it possible to like someone without loving them?
Ans: Yes.

Q. Is it possible to love someone without liking them?
Ans: Yes.

Q. If your lover betrayed you, what will your reaction be?
Ans: Make him feel like the world's worst loser and then move on.

Q. If the person you secretly like is already attached, what would you do?
Ans: Keep safe distance.

Q. What takes you down the fastest?
Ans: Umm...the stairs!? Ok, I'm bored of these questions now.

Q. How would you see yourself in ten years’ time?
Ans: Slimmer hopefully. But that's more like in ten months. I don't believe in ten year plans yaar..

Q. What’s your fear?
Ans: Ummm...losing people I love. And not being able to fulfill my dreams.

Q. What kind of person do you think the person who tagged you is?
Ans: A lunatic. And I mean this. :-P

Q. Would you rather be single and rich or married but poor?
Ans: Depends. Ladka kaun hai!? ;-)

Q. What’s the first thing you do when you wake up?
Ans: Brush my teeth!

Q. Would you give all in a relationship?
Ans: Isn't that how it's supposed to be?

Q: If you fall in love with two people simultaneously, whom would you pick?
Ans: Haha...two people!? Pehle ek to sambhalne do !!

Q. Would you forgive and forget, no matter how horrible a thing that special someone has done?
Ans: Koi guarantee nahi.

Q. If you get to go back in time and fall in love all over again, would it still be with the same person?
Ans: Not applicable.

Q: Describe your ideal man.
Ans: Ok, is this for 3 marks or 5 marks!? :-P
Ummm..lets see. Crazy sense of humour. Awesome killer smile. Sports freak. Music freak. Good English. Film buff. Cook. Eclectic interests. Experimental. Committed to his work and family. Totally mad. Should get on my nerves. Subtly romantic. Should please please exist. :-D

Phew! That wasn't too bad. Anyway P, now that I'm done, give me back what you've taken! :-P

And hopefully, I'll come up with a real post real soon...

Film Review: Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na

2008-07-22T09:28:00.012-04:00

I finally managed to see Jaane Tu Ya Jaane Na two days ago and I must say- this is probably the first time my prediction about a movie has gone wrong! When the whole Love Story 2050 vs Jaane Tu battle was on, I'd thought Love Story would do a lot better than Jaane Tu, not because it would be a brilliant film but because it would at least have a great deal of special effects (after all, 50 crores usi pe toh kharch kiye !!) and suitable eye-candy (read: the Baweja boy and his red haired girlfriend!) And from the looks of it (pun totally intended), these things do matter in the success of a film, regardless of the story. (Remember Om Shanti Om!?) And I'd thought Jaane Tu would be a copy of Kuch Kuch Hota Hai with a predictable storyline and weird looking actors (this was before I heard Imran Khan give an interview- smart fella, I must say!)

Anyway, I haven't been able to muster the courage to watch Love Story yet and Jaane Tu is pretty much a predictable flick, but I love the way Abbas Tyrewala has managed to stay away from a lot of the cliches surrounding the "best friends falling in love" stereotype. His background as a scriptwriter definitely show in the dialogues. I specially loved the Bottoms-up-Coke and the whole Rathod from Ranjaur angle. This is probably the only film of Sohail Khan I've found tolerable!

I'm not going to go into a detailed film review coz there are obviously a lot of those doing the rounds. It's the story of a boy and girl who are best friends and are also secretly in love. Only catch- the whole world knows this except them! So basically the whole story revolves around how they find this out. One thing I don't get though- why do all girl-best-friends of guys have to be tomboys?! Is that coz a girly girl would be too attractive for a guy to be just friends with?! Also, why does a tomboy girl have to become a girly girl when she gets a boyfriend!? Like start wearing dresses and straighten the hair and all that jazz! (I take personal offence to the latter! ;-)) C'mon, guys aren't that shallow na!? Or are you!?

I liked the fact that none of the male characters were templates of those typisch stud-boys waiting to bash up the next person! Neither were the gals the crying-at-the-drop-of-a-hat variety! But again- since they've shown Aditi to be the kinda gal who doesn't think twice before slapping or swearing at a guy, then why doesn't she do the same to that dumbass boyfriend of hers when he slaps her!? After all, he's the philandering one! Or is that asking for too much from a pretty lass in a Bollywood film!?

Loved the airport sequence- very very Bollywood, but still manages to make you smile. And thank God they made Jai sing the Jaane Tu.. wala song himself- bad vocals notwithstanding. It's small things like these which make Jaane Tu a lot better than other films of its genre. Also liked the whole Boms-Rotlu thing. It's heartening to see that finally film makers are opening up to the idea of a partly balding, weepy, (albeit sweet) collegian falling in love with a (cute?) gal, without making a joke of it. Love seldom is of the knight-in-shining-armour variety na!

Brilliant supporting cast which actually contributes to the storyline. Ratna Pathak Shah, Naseeruddin Shah and Paresh Rawal are mind blowing as expected. Their characters have been etched out beautifully. I loved Meghna's character the best, but I'm going to reserve my thoughts on that for a later post.

And the whole boy-and-girl-can-never-be-just-friends bit?! The less I say on this, the better. Somehow the first thing that comes to my mind whenever I think of this topic is an evergreen dialogue from Maine Pyaar Kiya said by a raging Mohnish Behl to Mr. Khan. It goes thus-

Prem...ek ladka aur ladki kabhi dost nahi ho sakte! Yeh toh ek natak hai...natak! Dhadakte hue dilon ki bhadakti hui aag ko chupane ka...bujhane ka...!!

Not that I subscribe to the view, of course! Best friends falling in love is probably the most common and convenient of all reel love stories, but it definitely doesn't have to be the case every time in real life!

So what's your aim in life ?!

2008-05-11T00:58:00.003-04:00

I was talking to a friend yesterday about how the whole placement scenario works in engineering colleges. It's weird, but the one thing Dale (a COEP professor, I think that's enough said!) was bang-on-target about is that the reason students want to get into a good engineering college is to get a good job! Somehow the moment you come to know you've cleared your third year, the one fear that strikes the mind of every engineering student is- placements! Anyway been there, done that. So I completely understand and sympathize with them! So, I was reliving my interview experience when I suddenly remembered this seemingly simple, but brillianto question this guy from Cognizant asked me- "What is your aim in life?"

Now in interviews and SOPs, you make up your answers. And more often than not, they consist of phrases you pick up from the company/university website spiced with stuff like "cutting edge research", "pioneers in the field of blah blah", "leaders of tomorrow", "perfect opportunity to hone my technical expertise" and what not! Obviously, coz these people decide whether you get the job or the university admit. But while I was telling her all this, I realized that I haven't even bothered to give a thought to its real answer all these years! (And I thought, at 23 I'd know it all!)

I remember when I was in school in Doha, my mom had a teacher friend who's daughter was about 5-6 years elder to me. I must've been around 13 then. So this daughter, all bright and smart, apparently told her mom that one day she'd have a flashy office on like the hundredth floor of a glass building from where it'd seem like the whole world was at her feet! See, that's so Shah Rukh Khan-isque !! Same illuminating moment came in his life when he declared to his friend, standing on Marine Drive (I think) that one day he'd own the city! And he so does! Lol.. Well, I have no idea whether that bright and smarty-pants daughter got her hundredth floor office or not, but the point is- she had the "guts" to make a statement like that, when she was all of 20! And that is what oh-so-impressed my mom, who got all sentimental that day! Made me seem like a fool coz I hadn't made any such promises; I was still battling with World War I statistics!

Then, I remember there was this one time my mom, sister and I were driving home from someplace, I'm guessing a fancy dinner coz that's when we're at out chattiest best! And I told my mom that one day I'd have a production company and I'd name it after her coz I was so proud of the way she'd raised me !! Yeah well, first reaction to that was shudder- why would I launch a production company!? And that was followed by laughter, fortunately not the ROTFLMAO kind coz she was driving! She thought I was drunk on food or something, making crazy statements like that! So there, my first attempt went down the drain! Well what do you know, I'll still have that production company one day; only it won't be named after her! So her loss, not mine !! :-P

Anyway, so ever since that fiasco, I stopped making such claims. 12th Boards happened, engineering happened and now further studying will happen. And I still don't have the answer to that billion dollar question- "Where do you see yourself ten years from now?!" (By the way, shouldn't that question be reserved for film stars; at least they'll have interesting answers!)

So, with a hint of apprehension, I attempt to answer that question today. And since I truly believe that success is a journey, not a destination (taaliyan !!), instead of a definitive target, I shall be listing out things I plan to accomplish before I'm 27. Why 27? Coz I don't think I can plan as far as ten years, a five year plan seems like a good start. (On an entirely different note- in five years I shall be 27!? When is that quarter life crisis supposed to hit!? Does it kill!?)

1. Have a job that will hopefully be related to industrial engineering and will be something I really care about. Now question for all working people- is it possible to have a job you care about or is that just a myth?!
2. Become a professional photographer.
3. Complete Dream Project 1. What the project is about is a secret. You'll anyway know when it's complete.
4. Have a detailed plan ready for the production company. Let's start with the name..
5. I do measure success to some extent with material possessions. So I'd feel really glad if I'd own my own house and car by then. I'm guessing if I accomplish 1 by the time I'm 25, then this wouldn't be an impossible dream.
6. Visit Egypt, Greece, Europe (at least Germany and France), Nepal and Australia. That's one for each year. And implied here, would be doing all the stuff that's typical of each place like scuba diving at the Reefs in Australia. This is in keeping with the "do everything at least once in life" motto! Hopefully one of the above will be one of those budget trips with random strangers, as I mentioned here.
7. Learn to speak German fluently. And manageable French and Spanish.
8. Learn how to play football, ekdam properly!
9. Visit an Indian Air Force base and hopefully co-pilot one of the jets. This is coz I'm crazy about the IAF (and NOT because of the airforce pilots in crew cuts; that's sooo typical... :-P) And if I were two centimeters taller (and a lot fitter), I'd be an IAF officer today!
10. Stay unmarried. Yeah well, you'll know why that's important once you meet my mom !!

Phew! There...that's my list! I don't know how many of these I'm going to be able to accomplish in the stipulated time frame. We'll continue this five years from today..

The Big C

2008-05-04T08:49:00.004-04:00

Well, no, I'm not referring to Cancer or Commitment though they are Big C's too! What I'm talking about is COMMUNICATION !!!

You know, I have more than 400 friends on Orkut. (Well if you've lived in two countries, gone to two schools, a junior college and a professional college, you end up knowing those many people! Anyway that's not the point here, so shush! :-P) And if seventy percent of these people have been in relationships (you know, the boy-girl-in-love types) that didn't work out, at least fifty percent of them feel they ended because they "didn't communicate at the right time". (How do I know this? I didn't conduct a survey; there's a section in the profile called "From your past relationships you learnt:". I know from that. See, Orkutting can be useful too! ;-))

There are reports of how the divorce rate in India, especially in metros, is increasing at alarming rates. Most couples blame it on miscommunication.

I was reading this article in India Today on teenage suicides. Apparently 16 teenagers commit suicide every day in India and 82% of them say they're under stress because their parents talk to them only about their marks and career, while they want to talk to parents about themselves.

Until a few years ago, I always thought that it isn't necessary to communicate your feelings to your friends and family. Since they've been such an important part of your life for so long, they'll understand what you feel. But the past few months have made me realize that this is far from true. It is often the people we're closest to, who need to know how much we care about them. And I'm not just including romantic relationships here; even our parents and friends come in this bracket.

All through my school and college, I've had so many friends, some who I thought would last a lifetime. But more often than not, we drifted apart in due course of time. And I often blamed my pals for what happened. It was always something they did or something they said that strained relations. Until I realized that since I was the common factor in all those disagreements, surely something would be wrong with me too!

My sister, though, is very good at this communication thing. Since she stays away from home, all the sms-es she sends my mom and me are laced with "Love you" and "Miss you" and what not. If we don't talk to her for more than 24 hours, she gets restless. And one thing she keeps telling us is that she doesn't want us to get used to living without her, ever! At face value, all this seems a tad too sentimental. I used to always think- What the hell, she's away from home to study. You can't afford to be so emotional about silly issues. But the fact is, she doesn't say this coz she is miserable without us. She's managing fine enough. But these are just ways to tell your people what they mean to you. And going by how much my mom loves those sms-es, I can safely vouch for it's success.

We people get so bogged down by the rigmarole of life that we often give our family last priority. And while I agree with the philosophy that "paisa hai toh jahan hai", we should not forget what we're losing out on, in the process. Which is where the second aspect comes into picture- communication at the right time! You know how these couples claim that one of the golden rules of a successful marriage is never to sleep over a fight. I think this is one practice everyone should follow. In fact, don't even wait for a fight. Prevention is better than cure here. And while I'm not saying that you should scoot off to send balloons/chocolates/gifts/flowers to your loved ones every single day, it always pays to take some time off over the weekend to call up or email your pals. Write crap, but write. Like a few days ago, a friend from the US sent me a silly email about why I should be thankful I got a reject from Georgia Tech as most people in Gatech are gay! Well don't ask me what that means, this guy is a little loony! (Sorry Soumya! :-)) But I was laughing for ten minutes after that! See how simple it was?!

So, all I'm saying is- It's important to not take your family and friends for granted. And while it may seem trivial to some, taking time out to involve your people in the happenings of your life really goes a long way in building trust and love in a relationship. If someone like me can learn to do it, it must be child's play for sure!

And since this has been a rather serious article, here's a joke to lighten the mood -

When God made the first Negro, what did he say?
Oh shit! Yeh toh jal gaya !! :-D:-D
(I don't know why, but I love this joke! Just the idea of God saying it is h-i-l-a-r-i-o-u-s, no offence to Black people, I love you guys! Go Obama !! :-D)

"Me" defined

2008-05-03T09:58:00.002-04:00

If any of you have been pondering over one of the greater questions of life- "Who am I, exactly!?"- then you should read about this interesting concept called the Myers-Briggs Type Indicator.

Now, I am generally wary of these multiple-choice personality-assessment questionnaires, having attempted wide varieties of them in Pune Times (!!) and the ever popular Tickle! Tickle, in fact, even has these "Ph.D certified" tests that help you determine how many karma points you accumulated in the past year and how bright your aura is, whatever that means! :-P.. But I must admit, I was amazed at the accuracy of the MBTI test. In fact it was one of those aha! moments for me, coz what the test reveals is stuff that you've known all along, but have never been able to put in words so succinctly. Besides, they put it all so nicely, it makes you think you're the greatest thing on Earth since sliced bread !! I took the test twice, just to see how reliable the results are, and they were 60% similar both the times. So I guess, that speaks for itself.

Excerpts from my report -

"......when it comes to their own areas of expertise - and INTJs can have several - they will be able to tell you almost immediately whether or not they can help you, and if so, how. INTJs know what they know, and perhaps still more importantly, they know what they don't know..." (That makes me feel like Socrates, though I think there are miles to go before I reach this stage! ;-))

"....produces an unusual independence of mind, freeing the INTJ from the constraints of authority, convention, or sentiment for its own sake"

"Anyone considered to be "slacking," including superiors, will lose their respect -- and will generally be made aware of this; INTJs have also been known to take it upon themselves to implement critical decisions without consulting their supervisors or co-workers." (Bull's eye, I admit!)

And this one takes the cake -

"Personal relationships, particularly romantic ones, can be the INTJ's Achilles heel. While they are capable of caring deeply for others (usually a select few), and are willing to spend a great deal of time and effort on a relationship, the knowledge and self-confidence that make them so successful in other areas can suddenly abandon or mislead them in interpersonal situations. This happens because many INTJs do not readily grasp social rituals; for instance, they tend to have little patience and less understanding of such things as small talk and flirtation (which most types consider half the fun of a relationship). To complicate matters, INTJs are usually extremely private people, and can often be naturally impassive as well, which makes them easy to misread and misunderstand. Perhaps the most fundamental problem, however, is that INTJs really want people to make sense. :-) This sometimes results in a peculiar naivete', only instead of expecting inexhaustible affection and empathy from a romantic relationship, the INTJ will expect inexhaustible reasonability and directness. "

"....the strongest INTJ assets in the interpersonal area are their intuitive abilities and their willingness to "work at" a relationship."

Anyway, true or not, apparently I share my personality type with Lance Armstrong and Richard Gere !!! Aur kya chahiye !! *stars in eyes*

Anyone interested can take the test here. And do let me know how bang-on-target your assessment turns out!

My Daddy Coolest !!

2008-04-30T07:11:00.004-04:00

Yeah well, as the title suggests, this post is dedicated to my Dad. Not coz today's his birthday or coz he did something great today. Even it were a special occassion, it would be very uncharacteristic of me to write a post about him because as I mentioned earlier, I'm a private person and besides, my dad and I aren't the very vocal-with-our-feelings kinda people.

Infact, my dad and I haven't done any of the things people usually associate with "dads". We haven't ever discussed my career. When I decided to take up engineering, he didn't ask me the quintessential "Why?" question even once, though he was a mechanical engineer himself. Nor have we ever discussed what I plan to do ahead. When I started my MS applications, he had no idea of the universities I was applying to. But the most amazing thing is, I'm glad he's not like that! See, I get enough of those life-shaping discussions from my mom so I am more than thankful about not getting them from dad !! My mom was always in awe of her dad. She's told me a million times that though they had really enlightening talks together, she always considered his words to be the pather ki lakeer. It was never that way with dad and me. I respect him and all obviously, but in the normal way one respects ones' parents. We aren't back-slapping buddies or anything but I definitely don't get intimidated by him !!

Anyway, since this post is for him, and both of us share a weird fondness for list-making and bulleted info, I'm going to list out why I think he's the coolest dad in the world -

He knows everything about Bollywood. The new movies, the link-ups, gossip, what happened on which film's set...all such kind of crap. Which is rather cool considering not many 51 year old men are really interested in that kind of stuff !! So, being crazy about Bollywood myself, most of the "discussions" we have at home are on the latest B-scoop. And considering the fact that the Mumbai newspapers print a lot more of this info than the Pune editions, I sure get a hell lot of updates from him!
He gets all the latest flicks a day after their release! A movie releases on a Friday and it's on his pendrive on Saturday! Some guy in their office is heavily into piracy apparently. Ok, so I'm not proud of it, but the advantage is- if there's a particular movie I really want to see, but it's not worth spending even 50 bucks in a theatre, then this works out perfect! I'm really waiting for him to get Tashan..
Speaking of theatres, he's the only member of my family who doesn't mind watching a movie from the first row. And my years in COEP have made it sort of a tradition to buy only the cheapest seats available.
We both are cricket crazy people. So if there's a match going on over a weekend, it's like a picnic for us. My mom watches cricket only if it's an India-Pak match or if India is playing the final of a series like the World Cup (which is rarer than a blue moon !! :-P). That's why I see IPL matches only on Saturdays and Sundays! Only problem though is that he supports Mumbai Indians (damn those people for winning yesterday !! :-P) while I support the Knight Riders !!
He knows all about politics, so he's my one-stop encyclopedia for all the crap that goes on between BJP, Congress, Bush, Obama, Clinton blah blah..
He's as technology and gadget crazy as I am (though I wouldn't say the same for techno-savvy !! ;-)) So whenever we buy any electronic items, they have to be the absolute latest in the market. He'd rather not buy them than buy a cheaper, older version.
He's actually proud of my collection of books and so in effect, appreciates my reading habit. My mom also likes "story-books" (yup, that's what she calls my grown-up bhandars of knowledge, how insulting na!) but she considers reading them to be a waste of time and money! Maha-paap !!!
He's totally cool with us drinking! He doesn't go all "He bhagwan, my daughter's gone haywire, ab mera hya hoga !!" My sister had her first beer with him when she was 18.. Yup, he abhors laws too !! :-) (Please note: This does not mean that we take undue advantage and go on drinking binges. We're good girls and know our limits. Seriously.)
One thing I've inherited from him apart from my weird hair, is a knack for sarcasm. (Well, it may not show on the blog but when I bring it on, it's really biting crazy!) So we have these spontaneous duels every weekend where we're allowed to say whatever we want to cut each other and no one takes it very seriously. And believe me, it is so amazing to have a parent who doesn't expect you to be too respectful of him every waking moment and can take a joke on him light-heartedly!
My dad truly understands my need to be in a creative field too, in addition having a "stable job". And it's such a relief to know that!

Anyway, I guess I'm going to stop now, though I can think of a lottt of other reasons. I guess the main reason I wrote this post is coz I was feeling kinda guilty about not having written about him on my blog earlier. I've mentioned my mom a lot of times. So this was to take that guilt away though I know he's never going to read this coz he doesn't have my blog address and well, I don't intend to give it to him in the near future !! Anyway, I'm not going to end with the maha-senti "I love you, Dad", coz as I said, we're not very expressive people. So all I want to say is- "Dad, please don't change ok!" :-)

Cheers! *clink*

Random tag about random things

2008-04-29T02:28:00.002-04:00

I've been seeing this tag do rounds of the blogosphere for quite a while now, where you have to list out ten random things about yourself or something like that! Anyway, the few posts I've been working on just aren't turning out right, so I thought I might as well attempt it... (As a side note, somehow all the tags I write are a result of boredom and incomplete posts !!)

Anyway, so here goes -

I like reading the entire newspaper/magazine in one sitting and hate being disturbed while I'm reading. And we get two newspapers at home and subscribe to 5 magazines (JAM, Readers Digest, India Today, Good Housekeeping and Health!) My ideal sunday morning is sitting with the paper for one hour straight, with no telephone calls and other distractions. Really makes my day! Newspaper reading also is a major stress buster for me. Like if I'm getting nervous before an exam, the best thing to do is read the newspaper. Somehow calms me down.
I'm very possessive about my books collection. It's not very exhaustive or anything, but I love each of my books to bits. I lend them only to people I totally trust.
I'm a complete morning person. The only time I really enjoy staying up late is during a party or when I'm chatting with old friends on the Net. On most days, I'm up by 6 am and get very irritated even if I oversleep till 6:30-7. That's "late" for me !!
I have a thing for registrations numbers of vehicles. The number plate is the first thing I look at when I see a vehicle (unless it's a Merc or an H3; that's when I ogle at the vehicle first and then look at it's number plate! ;-)) and it happens involuntarily. So I know the vehicle numbers of all my friends, relatives, people of my society and some random vehicles I've seen around in Aundh area. About 4 years ago, I saw an unknown guy drive my friend's Matiz- recognized it was his from the number plate obviously. He was studying in the UK then, so I told him about it and it turned out that his parents had sold it to someone else just a day back and hadn't told him about it yet !!
I also have thing for remembering people's birthdays (without reminders on cellphones!) I even remember the birthdays of most of my schoolmates, though I haven't even spoken to some of them since we left school 7 years ago! Somehow can't get the dates out of my head !! :-)
I hate clutter. I'm not much of a cleanliness freak a la Monica, though I do have an Annual Room-Cleaning session (I just had this year's session over the weekend, but more on that later) The point is- I don't mind an untidy room, but I don't like things strewn about the place. I'd rather have them stacked up in one corner until I find the time to clean it up.
I own 3 pairs of shoes- my gym shoes, my floaters for college and a pair of sandals with Indian wear. I'm not too crazy about bags, jewellery, shopping and gossip too. Nor do I freak out at the sight of lizards, cockroaches and other unidentified flying and crawling objects. Therefore, I hate it if people generalize statements about "girls".
I hate people who are cruel to animals. I'm vegetarian coz I saw a butcher cut meat once and I couldn't sleep for 2 nights after that! I don't mind it if people don't like animals, its a personal choice; but atleast don't hurt them. Infact there have been many occasions when I've lectured random kids on roads who think it's funny to throw stones at stray dogs and laugh about it with their pals!
I have this weird desire to try everything once. And I mean it literally. This pertains to music, food, languages, skills, places... Like this one time, I saw an advert for coffee painting classes in the newspaper and I wanted to attend them. And I don't even know what coffee painting is !!
One thing I really really want to do is scoot off on a budget trip to some godforsaken place with complete strangers! I hope that happens in the next two years...

Go Knight Riders !!!

2008-04-18T07:15:00.004-04:00

The million dollar question of the year is- Will IPL work?! People are talking about it all over, my dad and I have been discussing it for the past month...it's created a frenzy even before it began! Anyway here's why I think IPL will work this year- Pure beginner's luck! See, the media hype over the event has crossed all boundaries- the auction, the filmstars/industrialists/other party people (That's what you call Vijay Mallya right!? ;-)) bidding for players, which players end up together, the whole speculation about whether the event will even see the light of day etc etc... has definitely managed to grab more than the attention of the Indian audience. The adventurous ones are looking forward to it; the sceptics are waiting for the whole thing to fall on it's face so that their bhavishyavani can be proved right...but either way, people are going to watch the matches!

Some will buy tickets because for them, live cricket is the real thing, hardly matters whether its India vs Pakistan or Chennai vs Mohali !! Added attraction, of course, is the Bollywood quotient! Another section of viewers will be curious to know how many people land up at the stadium, so they'll go to see that. Same goes for the TV audience! And it's a T-20 format, so you blink and it's over...doesn't disrupt the sanity of the house too !!

So basically, the team owners and sponsors earn their money, the cricketers get their money, the viewers get to see innovative cricket...everyone's happy! Whether the trend will continue next year- now that's something that can't be predicted right now !! So enjoy it while it lasts...

Anyway, I'm supporting the Kolkata Knight Riders !! They're easily the best team- Sourav Ganguly, Ricky Ponting, Murali Karthik, Chris Gayle, Ishant Sharma...and of course Shah Rukh Khan...aur kya chahiye !! :-D

We're too hot,

We're too cool,

We are the King's Men,

We rule !!!

Korbo Lorbo Jeetbo reeeee...!!!

Check out this ad too. SRK is like the marketing God !! GO KOLKATA !! I'm lovin' it already !!! :-D:-D

So...which team are you rooting for ?!

Asli swaad zindagi ka !!

2008-04-18T01:24:00.001-04:00

This is probably the worst phase of the advertising industry !! Most of the ads we see nowadays are downright stupid (seen the ones for Axe deo, perfume etc? Yuck !!) and somehow today's advertising "gurus" have forgotten have forgotten that an ad sells a product- not a celeb !!

Anyway, this is probably one of my all time favourite ads !! Came across this on a friend's profile and it truly brought back fond memories of some really good (and may I add, simpler!) times !! :-) No jazz, no snazzy shots, no eardrum-bursting music and thankfully no stars! Just a yummy product and an easy concept- Eat Cadbury, enjoy life !! :-)

And the girl's impromptu jig when her guy makes a century...priceless !! :-)

Naam toh suna hoga ?!?!

2008-04-17T10:42:00.003-04:00

I read this post today, on Rashmi Bansal's awesome blog. It's this analysis on common Indian names for girls and boys. Very interesting insight, though some of the Sanskrit names are really freaky! Sample this: Mrigankshekhar, Joushura and Arkoprabha! Yikes !!

I, for one, feel very strongly about parents giving their children nice names. I know it may not be a big deal to some, but a name is like your identity for the rest of your life! I don't know how many of you have noticed, but a person with a nice-sounding or unusual name always manages to grab attention of the listener a lot easier than a person with a run-of-the-mill name. And given the importance of "first impressions" these days, a nice name is the work half-done, right ?!

Like this incident that happened when I visited IIT, Bombay last week. I was on the train from Kanjurmarg to Dadar to catch a bus back home. And there was this lady with her newborn kid (his first travel by train it seems, taaliyaan !!) and her mother-in-law. They were playing with him, trying to keep him occupied n all....and all of a sudden, the MIL takes him in her arms and says, "Kaalicharan...arre o Kaalicharan! Train mein baitha hai mera bachcha....!!" Now I know that Kaalicharan is probably the name of a Hindu God and so they've named him that, and I respect their sentiments. But imagine what a complex that kid will grow up with, with a name like that in 21st century India! Realistically speaking, it's not very fair to the kid, right?! Gogol Ganguly type crisis all over again!

I keep telling my parents that one thing I'm glad they gave me (apart from the usual moral studies on respect for elders, honesty blah blah...) is a good name! It may sound vain, but it's true.. (Also, I inherited the weirdest hair in the world from my dad's side, and there's not a week I don't crib about it. So this, kind of, has a mollifying effect! Makes him feel less guilty! ;-)) Suparna is a name that's not very common in Maharashtra and neighbouring areas (more of a Bengali name apparently!) so I get a lot of the "Hey, nice name!" from strangers and that does make me feel uber-cool...!! ;-) Besides, all my friends have like the most boring names in the world (sorry people, but it's true! :-P) so that's like icing on the cake!

So, lesson to all parents: Give your children good names, please. Very important issue.

P.S.1- I'm named after a character on a daily soap that used to run on DD around the time I was born! There was apparently this lawyer lady called Suparna on the show, who had a really strong and powerful persona. My mom loved her so much that she decided to name me after her!
There's something about me I'm sure you don't care about !! :-P

P.S.2- Two names I really love are Aditya and Niret. And though Rashmi says Aditya is the most common name among boys these days, I don't have any friends called Aditya! (Only acquaintances but I can't take the liberty of calling them "Adi" na !! Sob! :-( Lol.. That's such a girly thing to write !!)
I have no idea what Niret means, just love the sound of the name!
That's another bit of useless trivia about me for you !! Enjoy !!

Mush on the net !!

2008-04-15T03:43:00.008-04:00

I'm not a very big fan of publicizing my personal (read: love) life- whether in public or on the net! I find it pretty incredible how couples are so upbeat about the idea of putting up little details about their "better"-half or their marriage on their blogs or personal websites. I'm not saying it's wrong or whatever; I guess it's just about me being a kinda private person, that's all.

But I came across this and this on the blog of this girl I know through a common friend. Now, though I don't think I would ever write similar posts on my blog, reading them even made me go awwwww...... :-)

Note to all boyfriends: Girls like having a "proposal story", so even if you'll have been seeing each other for ten years, make it a point to formally "propose" to your girl before taking the big step !! She's obviously going to say yes, so you don't have to get all jittery and anxious about it.. You may call it the western influence or whatever..but it's important to us! Gives us a nice story to tell the children and grandchildren and well...makes you look kinda cool too !! ;-)

Found this cartoon strip on the net - guys would probably be able to identify with this! ;-) Cheers !!

Film Review: U, Me Aur Hum

2008-04-13T02:46:00.006-04:00

I have a great deal of respect for first time film directors. So I make it a point to definitely watch their films (in the theatre) in the first week itself. And of course, when the film is made by someone like Ajay Devgan, the anticipation is even more, and justifiably so!

But unfortunately, the film- though strong in its conception- didn't quite live up to my expectations. I expected the film to have a tried and tested template- you know- boy meets girl, something goes wrong, but they get back together, marry, again something terrible happens but they tide over it and well...live happily ever after! This fact in itself was surprising, considering romance isn't exactly what Ajay Devgan is known for, in the film industry. But though the start is pretty typical (especially the title montage with love quotes amidst white clouds!), the story takes on a brilliant turn after the initial mush is done with. Surprisingly, the brilliant Kajol and Ajay Devgan pairing doesn't quite make the mark this time. Their earlier films together- who can forget the frothy Pyaar to hona hi tha and the sensitive Dil kya kare- had a freshness and genuineness to them that made them stand out. But somehow, the whole part where Dr. Ajay, a psychiatrist meeting Piya, a waitress on a cruiseline, falling in love with her "at first sight" (phew!) and trying to charm his way to her heart, comes out a tad too artificial. The sequences are cliched (salsa and liqueur chocolates.....really!?) and Kajol and Ajay look too comfortable with each other to seem like first-time lovers! This is probably why the first half doesn't make an impact!

The story does pick up a lot in the second lot- that's when you actually have a "story" to the film actually! The whole Alzheimer's issue and what each of the characters go through while dealing with it has been brought out brilliantly! That's the sort of stuff you expect from a veteran actor, who's done more than his share of meaningful cinema. There's limited yelling, screaming and depression and the film does progress through all of that to successfully bring out its point- that is to convey the true meaning of togetherness and commitment. But again, one thing I didn't like about this part is the supremely detailed visuals. I distinctly remember this scene where it's raining and Kajol loses her way home and can't remember her address etc. There's this part where the camera focuses on the raindrop falling off her eyelashes as she blinks! And there's this other part where we have orange brain cells trying to transmit some information and slowly turning a dull grey (obviously decaying coz of the disease) I mean, what is that about?! The way I see it- if you have a complicated and layered storyline, keep the visuals simple so that it doesn't get too garish on screen! Remember TZP?! Special effects are used to add charm to otherwise cocky stories- like in Dhoom 2 !!

One thing I really liked about the movie though- are the supporting characters. Brilliant performances by Sumeet Raghavan and Divya Dutta- as expected, of course. Isha Shervani and Karan Khanna don't do much, except add a few laughs here and there! What's different in this film is that the supporting characters don't waltz in every 15 minutes just to sing-n-dance or drink vodkas! They actually "support" the main characters- like extended family. And since there are no sasu-mas and pitajis in this film, these friends provide the love, support and encouragement to the main couple when the need arises. This is the kind of importance not given very often to the supporting star cast. As a director, Ajay Devgan has really scored brownie points here!

Songs are nice, nothing that lingers on in our minds! All in all, it's a film worth a watch- at least for its second half. I think after this film, no one will be questioning Ajay Devgan's competence in handling love stories. But one suggestion- maybe everyone in Bollywood should steer clear of the "love at first sight" concept yaar. It was great when Yash Raj Films did it but it's become a bit too commonplace now and well, everyone knows that doesn't work! ;-)

(Read an awesome review of the film here)

Wondering..

2008-04-08T08:42:00.003-04:00

What is the best way to make a decision or choose between two options laid out in front of you, if you don't know which of the two is best for you?!

Like consider a situation where you have two options- O1 and O2 -

O1 is what people term as a "safe bet". It's something that's been done before, will fetch immediate returns and guarentees (instant) success to a large extent. It's also something you know you will be pretty good at and will make you happy.

Whereas O2 is not exactly what is termed conventional, it would bring success- but only in the long run. It is something you think you're good at, but you're not sure coz you've never really given it your best shot yet. But it's something that'll make you happier, much happier !!

So now how do you decide what to go for?! Either you have the gumption to take a decision and stick to it, no matter the consequences- which would be the best way of course, but only in an ideal world! What if you don't have the capacity or the maturity to choose? Another option, in this case, is to leave it to nature/fate/God right.. The whole The Alchemist type mindset.

"When you want something - the universe conspires in helping you to achieve it."

So you go for O1 and if that works out, you take it as a sign and accept that it was the right option for you. If that doesn't work out, obviously O2 is the way to go! Simple enough. But here's the catch. What if somewhere in the deep, dusty corners of your heart, you want to choose O2 coz you know that's the way to go. (Inner voice and all that...) But you still choose O1, hoping that it won't work out and O2 would automatically fall open for you. But O1 works !! And it works better than you expected it would !!

Then what do you do? Do you take that as a sign and accept that O1 is actually right?!

Don't you owe it to yourself to give O2 a shot too ?!

Guess it takes courage to not just take a decision, but also to decide how to take that decision eh !!

Knot ready yet !!

2008-03-29T06:13:00.007-04:00

By some strange coincidence, a lot of people I know have got/are getting married in the period from May '07 to July '08- at least 20 people until now and another 15-20 people due in the coming few months. (Please note that for me, being engaged is pretty much equivalent to getting married; hence I include both the sets of people in the same category!) Now though I always used to be (pleasantly) surprised as each wedding invitation kept landing in my inbox, it never bothered me that much coz all were people who were at least 2-3 years elder to me, if not more.

Anyway, cut to about a week ago. I'm talking to one of my best friends- Z, on the phone. We were discussing some teaching assignment she's doing and that is the moment she chooses to tell me that her parents are "looking" for a boy for her and she'll probably be married in the next one year! Now, that freaked me out for three reasons :-

1. I'm petrified of marriage. No, I'm serious. Love and relationships is ok, but marriage is a very different ball game man...impossible to think about it right now!
2. She's my age. Actually, she's 35 days younger than me.
3. She seemed cool about it! I kept yelling and screaming on the phone (which isn't something I do very often, it's a skill only Gauri has!), while she was like, "Yeah! So...just thought I should tell you. My parents think it's the right time!" :-0:-0

See, I know of girls who turn 21 and all of a sudden, the only thing they want to do in life is- get married. I'm not judging them or anything. They're just people who're happier when they're running a home and managing a family. That's a hard job too. But Z is not like that. I know she needs a great career as much as she wants all of the other stuff. Sure, people say a marriage doesn't mean the end of a career, but it surely delays the process a bit right!?

I also know that Z's parents are very cool people, so I never thought they'd be the type who'd get unduly tensed about things like settling down and all. But I guess, on some level, parents of girls are all of the same kind. (Damn!!) I actually had an argument with my mom on the same issue once, when I told her that I felt she was treating me like a to-do list- you don't feel satisfied unless you tick off one of the activities on that list each year!

Anyway not much point to this post, except that- Z, I don't know if you read my blog. But if you do, I'm not dissuading you from going for it. But only if you feel it's the right thing to do! Also, make sure I'm in India for the big day ok! :-) And secondly, parents- please stop worrying about your girls! Don't try to force them down a path when they're (k)not ready yet !!

Peace.

My future lies in a nadi !!

2008-03-22T08:29:00.005-04:00

Ok, so not exactly that kinda nadi ! :-)

People who've read this blog from the start know of my mom's obsession with the stars. I had another experience in the same domain, a few days ago. I don't know how many of you are aware of this branch(?) of fortune-telling called "Nadi Astrology". The first time I heard of it was on this show on Tamil Nadu on Discovery. It looked pretty simple then, and the anchor didn't quite explain the whole thing well enough. Anyway turns out, my mom's sister's sister-in-law (!!) knows someone who does Nadi-reading right here in Pune. So obviously, my mom had to pay homage to this great art. After her visit, she was so impressed with it that she dragged me along to the revered centre last week. I found the whole experience rather interesting, so I'm going to cut the sarcasm now and tell you what it's all about -

For background information on Nadi astrology, check out this link. Quoting from here -

"Nadi is an ancient astrology, which has been composed by great Maharishis (sages) of India in the past using their spiritual powers. The sages recorded these predictions for every individual for the betterment of humanity and to safeguard dharma (righteousness). These sages predicted the characteristics, family history, as well as the careers of innumerable individuals contain in several thousand volumes, each containing around a hundred predictions. The Rishis, who dictated those Nadis, were gifted with such a remarkable foresight that they accurately foretold the entire future of all mankind."

And here's what happens when you visit a Nadi reader -

First you're asked to give your thumb impression on a blank piece of paper, along with your date and time of birth. No name or any other info to be given then. This guy then takes the paper inside (to the bank of palm leaf bundles, I presume- which is called the Nadi) where one of the Nadi readers matches your thumb impression to the corresponding bundle. It's not always that you get your match though. My mom got her's immediately, whereas I was asked to come back in a week. (They got the correct set from Tanjore, which is like the headquarters) This is your first step.

Next, the reader asks you a number of questions about your name, parents' name, siblings' names, other biographical info, events of the past etc. Now here's the interesting bit. He's actually reading out this info from the leaf- you're not asked all of it directly. And you're just supposed to answer with a yes/no! This is to verify which leaf from the bundle belongs to you. What shocked me the most about this part was- how, on earth, does this guy know every single detail about all the significant events of my past!? And when I say "every single detail", I mean it! There was actually a point where he asked my mom to go out of the room coz he was going to talk about stuff he wasn't sure my mom would or should know! (Thank God he had the sense to do that!) I mean...to believe that all of this was actually written down by some Maharashi centuries ago, is like being told that- "dude, you're the actor, the film's already been scripted and no matter how much you object, it can't be changed coz the director's dead!" It's like taking Shakespeare a little too literally..!! But it's all there, written in some weird Tamil script, so you can't even not believe it! Anyway once this is done, you're through with step two.

Finally, he starts the future predictions. And he really goes to the nitty-gritties of it all! Like he told me about some accident I was going to have when I was 42 and hell, I even know the age at which I'm going to die! (Nah don't worry, I live long enough! :-P) He records all of this on a cassette and you're supposed to take it home with you so you can listen to your life chronology over n over again!

(Read the detailed procedure here.)

I was pretty blown over by the entire experience. But the fact is- though it may make you believe that your life is indeed, pre-ordained, not everything of what he reads out about your past from your leaf is true. So it's not like all of what he says about your future is going to happen. Also, I know of a girl who took her two German friends along for a reading and they were told their leaves aren't there, even in Tanjore. So I don't know if the Maharashis limited their writings only to people destined to be born in India! I wanted to ask my reader this, but thought it would be too rude to cross-question him! And lastly, from what I gathered, he predicts the future on the basis of what's written on the Nadi leaf and a horoscope he makes using your time of birth n all.. So once again, the whole arguement of- "what if my time of birth is wrong; then the horoscope doesn't make any sense!"- resurfaces. Ultimately I guess, it's all about belief. I, for one, don't like any form of fortune-telling, science n all notwithstanding, coz I believe that the beauty of life is in its unpredictability. (Ahh the golden words! :-P) I know of people who've not even bothered to make a horoscope and believe me, they're doing fine! Besides, I don't want to live knowing that I'm going to be faced with a huge crisis in my 27th year! If some hardships/obstacles do come your way, as they obviously will, I think God/Nature has made humans strong enough to fight them. It's just up to you now, to decide whether you derive strength from within yourself/God or take the help of some pujas/lucky charms!

P.S.- Anyone wanting to visit this centre- it's in Kothrud near Vanaz. Leave me a message, I'll give you the contact number.

Tryst with the kitchen

2008-03-10T07:33:00.003-04:00

I've always taken some sort of perverse pride in the fact that I suck at cooking! In the sense, I not only was absolutely inept in making the stuff deemed "simple" by my mom like an egg omlette, but I couldn't even distinguish between the different dals (you know...moong, udad and the like..) and different masalas! It never bothered me, of course. For me, cooking was never one of those skills a person needed to show atleast minimal expertise in. Infact it's a standing joke in my family that a guy fit enough to be my life partner would need one of these qualifications- he should either be a good cook; or should be rich enough to afford one !!

I think my hatred for cooking was because my first two attempts at it failed miserably. The first time was when my sister and I decided to surprise my parents on their wedding anniversary by making them pinwheel sandwiches! (I was around 12 then; I had simple tastes :-P) We were supposed to mix cream cheese and tomato ketchup, add salt and pepper, apply it on the bread slices and roll them up. Simple enough, eh?! Well, everything that could possibly go wrong, did. The cream cheese and ketchup mix wasn't smooth enough, I added too much salt and pepper and the bread got all soggy when the mix was applied on it, so it didn't even roll up properly! We ultimately ended up eating the mixture without the bread so as not to waste it, and bought a cake for our parents! So basically, when you mess up something as simple as pinwheel sandwiches, it doesn't do much to bolster your confidence! Added to that is the fact that my mom always says that I look my awkward best when I'm in the kitchen! The icing on the cake was when I messed up Maggi noodles! Huh! Well, over time I did manage to make a decent omlette, so I could atleast rake up something to eat in case of an emergency.

The past week has been a radical change though. I think it all started when the admits count reached four. I think my mom had been waiting for this very opportunity all this while. I knew it was coming of course; I didn't want to be thrown out by my room-mates in foreign land coz I didn't know how to cook! So now I proudly declare that the jinx is over and I can make edible food, fit enough to be consumed by fellow graduate students! :-D:-D Of course, I still hate cooking and I'm bored of it in just a week but atleast I know that I won't go hungry now. And I admit, it's pretty easy to make the simple Indian stuff, as long as you get a judgement of the proportions of the salt, sugar and the masalas. Besides, it does feel good to sometimes cook for your people- even if it's a simple gobi ki sabzi! The best part was when my dad told my mom ki kabhi socha nahi tha ki kisi din apni beti ke haath ka bana khana bhi kha sakenge! Lol.. :-D

Current Mindset

2008-02-13T08:11:00.000-05:00

Ok... so I suck at poetry n all....couldn't compose a couplet even if I was held at gunpoint !! But this song by Wendy Matthews pretty much sums up my current mood...

The Day You Went Away- By Wendy Matthews

Hey, does it ever make you wonder

what's on my mind

I, I was only ever running to your side

I never cried, I just watched my life go by

It's just a pack of lies,

'cause you're leaving me behind

Why, after this long is there nothing

I'll keep, oh, I can shout

you'll pretend you're falling asleep

I live a lie, yeah, believing that you're mine

It's just a waste of time

'cause you're leaving me behind

Hey, there's not a cloud in the sky

It's as blue as your goodbye

and I thought it would rain

on a day like today

Hey, there's not a cloud in sight

it's as blue as your blue goodbye

and I thought it would rain

the day you went away

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

P.S.- Before your imaginative mind goes wild conjuring up some heartbreak crap, I state, for the record, that there's nothing of the sort.. Lol.. Enjoy !! :-)

Worth a thousand words !!!

2007-08-12T10:18:00.000-04:00

Says it all.... :-)

(Photo credits: Soumya)

Ich liebe Deutsch !!

2007-06-23T10:42:00.000-04:00

....and that is the extent of complexity I can manage in concocting a German sentence today, which is weird, considering that German has always been one language that I have absolutely and truly loved! I started learning Deutsch only in the ninth standard at Symbiosis. It was one of those composite languages we had, for fifty marks, and I took it up because my teachers told me it helped in easy scoring during SSC. And thank God I did !!

We were taught German by this teacher called Mr. Dusmanta Chakra, who is probably one of the most amazing teachers I have ever come across. He used to get a tape-recorder to class and teach us these fantastic German songs, complete with hand gestures and all- that used to be our education!

Of course, what makes German even more special is that it gave me Anushree, one of my best friends ever. Coz I think Social Studies, unfortunate rejections by other friends and a mutual maddening love for German were the three factors that formed the foundation of our friendship! We used to go for German class to this lady on Law College Road and those days spent in the company of stray dogs and Reena are probably some of the most memorable moments I’ve ever had. Then in tenth, I joined another class closer to home. A school friend of mine called Pranav and I used to go together for this class, in one of those tum-tums (six seater rickshaws)*. And the whole time, he used to fill me in on the latest bit of gossip among the Symbi guys- who secretly likes whom, what happened during the class picnic...all that kinda scoop. Used to be pretty interesting to know what guys talk!

So you see, apart from actually loving German, there were a lot of reasons why it was special to me. Of course, Anushree and I have a long cherished dream of going to Germany some day, for a nice long holiday. And Inshallah, when she’s earned a lot of money as an art historian and I’ve earned a lot of money as god-knows-what, a day will come when we’ll leave behind our pesky kids and boring routines to make that trip !!

So anyway, in my tenth standard, I participated in this competition organized by Max Mueller Bhavan, wherein students were supposed to write an essay on a given topic, short listed candidates had to go through a German interview and the top three won an all-expense paid trip to Germany, and get to stay with a German family etc- sort of a cultural exchange thing. I’m reproducing the essay I wrote here- for posterity. You see, the only copy I have of the essay is two A4 size sheets of paper which have already been folded seven times over! And though I narrowly missed making it to the top three, this was one of those times when I did something purely for the love of it, without a definite purpose in mind. I have no idea of how good the essay is, or how grammatically correct or incorrect it is, but it is something that I’m very proud of…

The topic of the essay was “Freiheit und Disziplin” or “Freedom and Discipline”. (We were school kids then, we weren’t supposed to have views on nuclear testing !! :-P..)

--------------------------------------------------
* Incidently, these tum-tums in North India are a fluorescent green colour and are called vikrams- I have no idea why !
--------------------------------------------------

P.S- The essay below is really long and in German. Reader discretion is requested!

FREIHEIT UND DISZIPLIN

Disziplin- das ist ein häßliches Wort für die Schüler. Aber die Disziplin ist sehr wichtig in Lebem besonders in die Schuljahren. Die Schüler, die als Kind schon diszipliniert sind, sind erfolgreich im ganzen Leben. Die Hausaufgabe rechtzeitog zumachen, täglich das Lehrbuch lessen, im Unterricht nicht laut sprechen, sich höflich benehmen, das alles gehört zur Disziplin.

Die Disziplin ist auch sehr wichtig für die ehrgeizigen Schüler.

“Der Fleiß in den Jugendjahren
wird später gold’ne Früchte tragen
Drum nutze jeden Augenblick
verlor’ne Zeit kehrt nie zurück.”

Sie haben gut Noten bekommen und haben viele Zeit für Lernen und Spielen.

Meine Schule besteht auf das Prinzip “Freiheit und Disziplin”. Unsere Schulleiterin ist streng, aber sie gibt uns auch die Freiheit. Wir dürfen unsere Gedanken ausdrücken. In der Freizeit düren wir mit einander sprechen, aber wir müssen nicht viel Lärm machen. Unsere Lehrer und Lehrerinnen schimpfen uns aber das ist für unser Gutes.

Aber viele Disziplin ist auch nicht gut. Die Jugenlichen düren Fehler machen und dadurch können sie lernen. Sie können über ihre Karriere selbst bestimmen wenn sie genug Freiheit genießen. Die Jugenlichen müssen eine Gelegenheit haben. Die Freiheit verbessert die Persönlichkeit der Jugendlichen.

Die Jünger in Europa habenmehr Freizeit als in Indien. In der Schule sind die Lehrer mildere und liberater als die Alten in den Gesellschaft. Das ist gut in gewissem Grad. Die Schüler legen dann keinen Wert auf das Lernen und die Zeit. Sie geben viel Geld aus.

Die indische Tradition hat viele Begrenzung. So die indische Leute haben nicht so viele Freheit. Indien ist nich ein senr moderner Land. Die Eltern kümmern sich um ihren Kindern und schützen sie sehr viel. So haben die indischen Jugendlichen nicht viele Freiheit.

Andererseits wird man unabhängig und pragmatisch wenn man frei ist. Aber viele Freiheit ist schädlich für die Erzeihung.

Man fragt mich: Wo willst du leben? Ich sage: Natürlich in Indien. Das Land hat 29 Bundesländer. Die Kultur ist reich und alt. Jedes Bundesland hat seine Tradition. Aber Indien, als ein Land, ist eine Einheit. Die Leute helfen sich. Indien beitet einen großen Spielraum für Entwicklung. Die Leute sind sehr klug und fleißig. Ich möchte in Indien altwerden. Für das Land und die Leute möchte ich vieles tun.

Die meisten indischen Politiker sind korrupt und unehrlich. Aber trotzdem möchte ich in Indien wonhen. Hier bleibe ich.

Indien hat eine größe Bevölkerung. So viele Leute sind arbeitslos. Viele Leute haben keine Chance im Leben. Die Leute sind arm und das Schulwesen hat keine Wert. Die Jugenlichen in Indien haben größen Druck von ihren Eltern, denn sie müssen gute Noten in ihrer Prüfung haben. Die Jugenlichen müssen immer lernen. Sie wollen in die Discothek und ins Kino gehen. Sie wollen unabhängig sein. Aber die Alten und die Großeltern sind alt-modisch. Sie dürfen die Jugendliche das alles nicht machen.

Besonders die Mädchen in Indien müssen im Haus bleiben. Sie dürfen nicht studieren. Die Jugendliche in Indien haben auch Druck von ihren Freunden. Die Jugendlichen möchten machen, was sie sich wünschen. Die Jugendlichen möchten besser als ihren Freunden sein. So sind sie aggressiv und anmaßend. Die Jugendliche in Indien wollen mehr Freizeit haben.

Die Jugendliche in Deutchland haben ähnliche Probleme. Sie fühlen, daß sie genug Freiheit nicht haben. Deutschland is auch ein industrielles Land. So viele Leute haben keine Arbeit. Das Leben für die Judendlichen ist sehr geschäftig. Die Jugendliche haben keine Erholung. So sind sie sehr nervös und aggressiv. Die Freunden der Jugendliche verführen sie oft. So fangen sie das Rauchen und das Rauschgift an. Sie zerstören ihr Zukunft. So ist die Disziplin wichtig im Leben, aber mit genug Freiheit.

“Früh übt sich, der Meister werden will”

They do it again...

2007-06-20T07:08:00.001-04:00

Tagged !!!

2007-06-05T07:22:00.000-04:00

Ah these book tags! I’m not particularly excited about writing this one, coz I don’t think I have a lot to boast about, as concerns books. This tag is just going to make me look ignorant and predictable! I haven’t read most of the really awesome books that a person my age should have read by now. I used to read quite a lot when I was in Doha. Somehow lost touch in the initial few years I spent in Pune. I’m actually grateful to Gau and Akshay for having brought "real" books back into my life.. Anyways, here goes-

* Total number of books that I own:
I haven’t really bothered to count, but I think it would roughly come to about a 100 !! I know, not that great… But as I said, I’ve taken up serious reading (again!) only in the last 4 years. Besides, a lot of the books I read are from the library. I buy books only during Crossword sales or when a friend strongly recommends one.

* Last book I bought:
That would be The Legends of Pensam by Mamang Dai. No, I hadn’t heard of it either, but I’d gone to this bookstore near my place to get a copy of The Namesake and this really cute store guy suggested this book, so I bought it !! (Whatever! Besides I didn’t have enough money to buy The Namesake, so settled for this one instead.) Haven’t read it yet, but it looks to be interesting..

* Last book I read:
The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri. Well, I bought the pirated version of the book finally. (I’m not proud of it!) But it’s way better than the movie, which kinda confuses you in the end. Though one good thing about the book is that the story goes much beyond ABCDs (American Born Confused Desis yaar !!) and their identity issues.

* One book I couldn't finish:
Ummm…quite a lot of them actually. It took three attempts to finish The Alchemist. I still haven’t finished The Goal by Eliyahu Goldratt. Don’t know why actually; guess it just got a little boring in the end. And I’ve been trying to read Atlas Shrugged for ages. Somehow I’m just not ready for another heavy duty dose of Ayn Rand, especially after Fountainhead.

* Five books which mean a lot to me:
This is going to be quite a run-of-the-mill list actually, because I haven’t experimented a lot with my reading. I think the experimentation will begin once I’ve read all the books on my must-have list..

- Doctors by Erich Segal:
Can I hear groans already?! Lol.. Ok, I know Segal is not something to be read more than once, but I’ve read Doctors four times already….and loved it each time! Of course, this may have to do with the fact that I’m fascinated by doctors, and this book tracks the lives of a whole group of Harvard Medical School graduates. Besides, I love the character of Barney Livingstone (one of the protagonists of the story). He, kind of, resembles this one person I know. And I love the friendship between him, Laura Castellano and Bennett Landsmann. It’s the kind of friendship I’ve always wanted. (No, this book is NOT a love story, as some people have assumed. People should read it before sprinting off to their own conclusions !!)

- The Agony and the Ecstasy by Irving Stone:
This is a biography of Michelangelo. I have to thank Anup for raving about this book so much that I had no choice but to read it. It’s easily one of the most inspiring books I’ve ever read.

- The Kite Runner by Khalid Hosseni:
My sister picked up this book on a whim at one of the Crossword sales, and I thought it would be some silly kiddy book. (See how ignorant I am... Didn’t know this book was on the bestseller list for quite a few months.) But this is a book that everyone has GOT to read. The narration is beautiful, almost poetic. I think no other author has made me “feel” every scene so vividly. The best thing is- the protagonist is in no way a conventional “hero”. He’s flawed, weak-hearted, confused, gullible and even mean at times, but when he is given the opportunity to redeem all that he ever lost, he goes all out, faces his worst fears and gets it.

- Fountainhead by Ayn Rand:
I don’t think I need to say a lot about this book. It makes you think, and it redefines a lot of your ideas, in a way…

- The Harry Potter series by J.K. Rowling:
Ahhh…now these books have been faithful companions through some rather tough times- boring submissions, exams, or just not-so-exciting semesters. Can’t wait for 21st July. Yup, big plans for The Day…I’ve booked a copy already and apparently Twist ‘n Tales will be open right from 6 am !! I just hope it lives up to all the hype !! But I’ll kill JKR if she kills Harry, Ron or Hermione in the end. :-)

* I am going to Tag:
Now the people I’m going to tag are rather voracious readers (or atleast have read a lot more variety of books than I have, so I’m sure it’ll make for some interesting reading. Plus, it’ll give them a reason to update their blogs.. :-P.. So I tag Anup, Akshay, Keshav, Vipin and Niri. (I dunno if you read, Niri, but nonetheless…atleast now you can’t copy-paste my post !! :-P..)

Facts...

2007-06-01T05:07:00.001-04:00

1. It’s easy to make a brand new start. Nothing to look back to, no limits to what you can achieve. What is difficult is going back to doing something you had left behind. Going back to complete something you left unfinished, especially when you know how different and difficult it’s going to be... It’s scary..

2. Paulo Coelho said it wrong. When you want something, the entire universe conspires in helping you NOT to achieve it. Maybe that’s why people talk so much about perseverance..

3. I still have to find that one thing that, in one stupid guy’s words, I believe in so much, that at times, it may even keep me awake at night..

4. I wonder why it’s so difficult to tell your friends what they mean to you for fear of sounding like a sentimental schmuck! I wish people would let their guard down just ONCE and speak their heart out. (This applies to me too. Coz I know how terrible I am at telling people I care. I expect them to "understand"- it’s kinda obvious, isn’t it?! ...no, it isn’t!)

5. I wish you knew I was talking about you.

Over and Out.

83 questions

2007-05-24T23:54:00.000-04:00

Disclaimer: Read the following only if you have nothing to do in life and/or are bored to death !!

Credits: Veepeen for putting it up on his blog first and Akshay for dhaaping it from him!

Ok...so I'm in the process of writing an article for JAM and somehow it's just not going right, when I see this questionairre type thing on Akshay's blog and think...hey that looks like a fun break.. So if you are in a similar situation, instead of wasting time reading my answers, attempt it for yourself.. It's quite interesting..

So, here goes -

1. Thought your cousin was hot? Nahhh...my cousins are bachchas !!
2. Been in love? Yep yep yep...
3. Gone over the speed limit? Do Pune roads have speed limits?!
4. Painted your room? No...that’s gonna happen this Diwali !!
5. Drove a car? Yup.
6. Danced in front of your mirror? Everyday!
7. Been dumped? Nope. Thank God!
8. Stole money from a friend? Nope. It’s more like they owe me money! Akshay, Mangesh and Gauri- pay up or you’re dead meat !!
9. Gotten in a car with people you just met? Yup.
10. Been in a fist fight? Yup. Loads of times.
11. Snuck out of your house? Not snucked out, but snucked in a few times.
12. Had feelings for someone who didn't have them back? Hell ya, it sucks!
13. Been arrested? No.
14. Left your house with out telling your parents? Yup, and had them scream at me later!
15. Had a crush on your neighbor? My neighbors are all 10 year olds.. I think it's time to change my house.. :-P
16. Ditched school to do something more fun? Of course!
17. Slept in a bed with a member of the same or opposite sex ? Yup.
18. Seen someone die? Yup, my neighbour’s dog. Most terrible feeling in the whole world.
19. Been on a plane? Oh yes, Doha to Mumbai, Mumbai to Doha for nine years !! :-)
20. Kissed a picture? Haha...no !!
21. Slept in until 3? Naaaaa...that’s not my thing! I think the latest has been till 12 !!
22. Love someone or miss someone right now? Totally !!!
23. Laid on your back and watched cloud shapes go by? Yup, during vacation.
24. Made a snow angel? I’ve never made a snow anything…but angel…eww…
25. Played dress up? Never, not even when I was five!
26. Cheated while playing a game? Oh ya!
27. Been lonely? Hmmmm...quite often in the past one year..
28. Fallen asleep at work/school? What a question! Obviously!
29. Been to a club? Nope.
30. Felt an earthquake? Yup.
31. Touched a snake? Nope, but I’d LOVE to! Snakes are pretty cool...
32. Ran a red light? Yup, right in front of the cops!
33. Been suspended from school? Thankfully no! My mom wouldn’t quite like that!
34. Had detention? A couple of times...
35. Been in a car? Yup, five minutes ago!
36. Hated the way you look? Hmmm...I kinda hate my hair!
37. Witnessed a crime? Yup, Mumbai local trains zindabad !!
38. Been lost? Yes, loads of times!
39. Been to the opposite side of the country? No...
40. Felt like dying from embarrassment? Lol...yeah on a few occassions!
41. Cried yourself to sleep? Hmmmm...yes. Some days are just plain bad!
42. Sang karaoke? Yup, it’s awesome fun! So what if I suck at singing...most people who sing karaoke do!
43. Done something you told yourself you wouldn't do? All the time. Mostly to convince myself why I shouldn’t do it!
44. Laughed till some kind of beverage came out of your nose? Again, loads of times!
45. Caught a snowflake on your tongue? Yup. Awesome feeling!
46. Kissed in the rain? Hmmmm...not exactly!
47. Sung in the shower? Everyday! Thinking of giving that Indian Idol thing a shot next year! :-P
48. Had a dream that you married someone? Haha...yes, once! One of the freakiest dreams I’ve ever had. And no, I’m not telling who I dreamt I got married to...poor guy would die of shock!
49. Played getting married? Never, its plain freaky!
50. Got your tongue stuck to a flag pole? No, does that happen to people!?
51. Ever gone to school partially nude? No!
52. Sat on a roof top? Yup, quite often!
53. Didn't take a shower for a week? A week?! No no no... Max is 3 days!
54. Ever been too scared to watch scary movies alone? Nope! I love them!
55. Been pushed into a pool with all your clothes on? More like I jumped into a pool with all my clothes on... C’mon, that’s fun !!
56. Been told you're hot by a complete stranger? Yes, men and women. Errmmm...a firang woman staying in Pune once asked me out after seeing my snaps on Orkut. Yes, I think all those people were blind!
57. Broken a bone? Like a fracture? Yup, twice!
58. Been easily amused? Yes, all the time.
59. Laugh so hard you cry? Yes, loads of times when with my COEP bozos!
60. Cheated on a test? Yes, once at school. Couldn’t do it again ever!
61. Forgotten someone's name? Lol...yeah! But that person forgot my name too..
62. Blacked out from drinking? No, it’s one of the things on my to-do list!
63. Played a prank on someone? Oh ya!
64. Gone to a late night movie? Yup. Kabhi Khushi Kabhi Gham, 11:00 pm show, Mangala... Don’t ask why!
65. Failed a class? Haha...yeah!
66. Choked on something you're not supposed to eat? Not that I can remember..
67. Played an instrument for more than 10 hours? 10 hours! No.. Maybe 5 or 6..
68. Cheated on a girlfriend/boyfriend? No, would never do that!
69. Did you celebrate the 4th of July? No.
70. Thrown strange objects? Yup...I do such things when I’m with my cousins!
71. Felt like someone? Ummmm...no! I actually don’t understand this question!
72. Thought about running away? Yup, loads of times!
73. Cried over someone? Yeah...but I was a 14 year old stupid girl then. And the guy’s my best friend now, so no worries...
74. Have a dog? Well, the neighbour’s dog is as good as mine. I have a cat though!
75. Own an instrument? Yup, a synth, a flute and a rattler!
76. Been in a band? In school.. Wait, Firodiya in COEP counts right?
77. Drank 25 sodas in a day? Nope!
78. Broken a cd? Not really. I’m pretty careful with them!
79. Shot a gun? Nahi yaar! Another thing on my to-do list. Akshay, can I borrow your dad’s gun?
80. Been on orkut for more than 5 hours? Nope. What a TERRIBLE waste of time!
81. Have a major crush on someone right now? A Crush?! I haven't had one of those ever since SE..
82. Have a religion? Yes.
83. Thought about what people would say at your funeral? Not really, but they’d say good stuff for sure... I’m pretty lovable! Besides, people generally say good stuff about you if you're dead.. :-)

I'm done! And now it's back to my article...

A world without men....

2007-05-23T23:47:00.000-04:00

Read this article in the Times of India nearly a month ago. But is one of the most hilarious pieces I’ve ever read (in TOI), so been wanting to put it up here for days...

The article is based on some new technique by which stem cells taken from men's bone marrow can be modified into an immature sperm cell, which would help scientists come up with better fertility treatments for men and women. Now leave the science part aside, that’s for the biologists. Here’s the part on what author thinks would happen to a world without men-

While the research will be fine-tuned over the years, it's already got people wondering. Is it possible that someday we might just have a world empty of the male species? For, once the technique of producing sperm from bone marrow is mastered, it is possible that female bone marrow will be used for the process.

Should that be the case, it's obvious all the babies will be girls because females cannot produce Y-chromosome sperm. Science apart, the idea seems very appealing, if not ideal. For one, there will be no violence. Bomb Iraq? And forego all those exquisite carpets and exotic spices? Forget it, darling!

In a world without men, sports will not mean raging hormones (Whoever heard of a woman biting off another's ear? Or butting her in the chest?).

Subtract men from this planet and ‘serial killer' will just mean the person who fired the gun in the nail-biting final episode of your favourite soap, not a psychopath with a personality disorder. Without men, global decisions will be taken with a warm heart and world summits sealed with perfectly manicured handshakes.

It's no secret that men are basically genetically modified women the female being the fall-back developmental pathway for any fetus. Bryan Sykes or Dr DNA as he is popularly known is a professor of Human Genetics at Oxford University. Sykes believes that men are headed for extinction in approximately 125,000 years.

While feminists are rejoicing at this latest research, chauvinists are understandably peeved. To pacify them, the idea of men not totally disappearing off the face of the planet but becoming a relatively less important part of the human race is being mooted.

As a result, the king of the jungle, the ultimate muscle-bound stud and God's gift to womankind will have nothing to do really. Except, maybe drink beer and sit before the television watching sports all day.

But wait a minute...In a woman's world, beer will be banned, television channels will telecast only soaps and sports will be the polite name for catfights. Men will exist, but only for our viewing pleasure. No foul-mouthed, beer-bellied, crotch-scratching, boorish men with receding hairlines, please.

In their place will be perfectly groomed, lip-smacking metrosexuals, all charm and chivalry... or is that extinct already? Their only use doing odd jobs and being toy boys of course, only after they've taken a crash course in foreplay. A world with such men? Amen!

Firstly, God...women are boring! And secondly, someone's gotta stop this research !! :-P

TRRP and Sports movies...

2007-05-23T13:26:00.000-04:00

One fine day, a pit-stop tire changer speeds along the roads of Manhattan in a taxi, coz he’s late for an appointment; in the process, he’s discovered by the team manager of a failing racing team, goes through some stupid selection and next thing you know, he’s a professional racer! Two days later, he’s won his first race, and subsequently goes on to win 50 titles over the next few years! This is the story of the first one hour of Ta Ra Rum Pum.. Now I didn’t know racing was that easy! No practice sessions, no rigorous training, no planning or talking sport with his teammates- all Mr. Racer dude does is sing and dance on the roads of NY with his lady love, get married and have children...and yes, race on the side! Interestingly he comes to know about the "bump and run" technique used in auto racing, only when he’s 50 laps through his first race; yet he sure becomes No. 1 !! And this is exactly how sports movies in India are made. Now if you are going to spend Rs. 25 crore on those racing sequences (which were really good, by the way), you might as well add a two minute prelude showing the guy practice a few laps, right ?!

See, the logic is simple. The focus of your movie may not be on the sport itself, but if your movie is about a sportsperson, do justice to the sport he plays. So if you have a movie on boxing, show the guy practice his footwork and pump some iron, coz without that, he’s not going to win those matches! Firstly, very few movies on sports are made by Indian filmmakers, and the ones that get made focus more on the iconic status and glamour of the "stars", conveniently sidetracking the hours of sweat and grime.

I think one of the best Indian sports movies ever made is- Iqbal. (Of course, there was Jo Jeeta Wohi Sikandar and Bend it like Beckham too; but JJWS was the one of the first movies of this genre I think, and Bend it.. isn’t exactly Indian, so I’m leaving those out) Coming back to Iqbal, the movie’s main focus was on the protagonist overcoming his disability, going against his father’s wishes and fulfilling his dream of becoming a cricketer. But what made the movie stand out was that it didn’t glamorize cricket as a sport (For a change!) It showed the protagonist go through intensive practice sessions, Ranji selections, strategizing, dejections, rejections and lots and lots of hard work. (I specially loved the training using the buffaloes and the chakravyuh concept.) That is what added so much credibility to the movie and the character of Iqbal. No wonder attendance at cricket camps went up after the movie was released.

I don’t know why filmmakers shy away from showing the non-glamorous side of the sporting world. It’s something that everyone knows exists, and it’s rather illogical to show absolute novices become overnight superstars! I hope someone understands that!

By the way, apparently Abhishek Bachchan and Bobby Deol play boxers in some movie called Jhoom Barabar Jhoom or something! Bhagwan hame bachao !!

And while we’re on the subject of movie themes, I think someone should make a movie on doctors too! Yes, people who know me know of my fascination for this profession, but seriously, there’s a lot to experiment with, and no one’s ever made a film on the medical world before… Mr. Madhur Bhandarkar, are you listening?!

For TML....

2007-05-22T08:10:00.000-04:00

Well, since I have spent a better part of the last one year at TATA Motors Limited, I think a post exclusive to it was long overdue. Kind of a record of the whole experience.. Of course, we do have a 110 page (yes, we wrote 110 pages; that’s why I haven’t been blogging !! :-P) colourful report, costing 400 bucks, to keep with us for as log as we’re alive..

Anyway, I think one of the best things about working at TML, especially in the Engineering Research Centre (ERC) was that...well, it looks good on the resume! I know that’s as selfish as it can get, but it’s also a fact. Firstly, for a mechanical engineering student, TATA Motors is one of the best companies you can get to do your project in, and secondly, Research is always an attractive word…makes people think you’re a rocket scientist! And of course, if you’re working on developing something called an "Active Bonnet", which most people haven’t heard of before, it’s like sone pe suhaga! (No, I’m not explaining what an active bonnet is...google it if you want to know!)

Coz anytime your relatives and friends (especially juniors) ask you what your project is all about, you can start rambling about how an active bonnet is a growing field of research, because pedestrian safety is a big concern nowadays, especially in European countries! Of course, throwing in jargon like safety regulations, reversible hinges, retractor pretensioners, deformation space, head impact tests etc in good measure, helps a lot!

No, jokes apart, we were really lucky to have got such an amazing project. (Thanks to Gau’s dad and Gogate sir!) Actually developing and testing your own mechanism is something very few undergrads can boast of doing. (Yes, what we did was something no one in India has done before! Seriously!) Besides, the whole experience of working in a company like TML for 8 months helped put a lot of things into perspective. Like the fact that what we have learnt in the past 3 years is just a tiny crystal on top of the iceberg; and that some of our basics are horrible messed up! Plus, considering the bigger picture, it helped answer a lot of the what-do-I-want-to-do-in-the-future questions.. So it definitely was a learning experience!

And, we developed a lot of valuable skills along the way. For one, efficient photocopying! And how to work from 6 am to 7:30 pm for two days straight, something I hope we never have to do again! Most importantly, patience! And loads of it! Well, when you’re made to work with shopfloor people who take fifteen minutes to fit one hinge on a car bonnet, you are left with no choice but to be patient! Of course, eventually we ended up doing the fitting jobs on our own, which works out much better...and faster!

But one of the biggest advantages we had was that we had a fantastic oral exam! And anyone who’s given a project oral knows how difficult it is to get one of those! The thing was, our examiners, like most people, had never heard of an active bonnet, and so after our presentation, instead of asking us screwy questions on why we did what we did, they were asking us stuff like- "So does the bonnet work like a spring in this mechanism?" and "If you raise the bonnet by 80 mm, wouldn’t it hamper the driver’s vision?" :-)

I should mention that it wasn't all fun, one of the downsides was that we ended up working a lot harder than most of our friends and seniors. We could take a break only if we had a really good reason, and our project guide was an absolute perfectionist, which is good in the long run, but as students who are used to bunking lectures and doing nothing at BC, it was a little overwhelming at times!

Anyway, all of that is over now! We just have a couple of things left to wrap up the project completely. And there’s this amazing feeling of accomplishment whenever I see my 110 page, hard-bound report with my name embossed on it in gold. Of course, 160 students of my batch have a similar report, but mine is different coz it’s the biggest of them all, and coz we worked the most for it, without any stipend!

So all in all, it’s been good !! :-)

That's me !!

2007-03-31T05:05:00.000-04:00

Ok people.. I know this is NO way to get back to blogging, but Vipin had this cool thing put up on his and I had fifteen minutes to spare this afternoon, so I gave it a shot too.. :-P..

And yes, ACTUAL posts coming your way very soon.. I promise !! :-)

Read my VisualDNA™ Get your own VisualDNA™

It's been a while !!

2006-05-29T09:24:00.000-04:00

New look. New name. And I officially announce that I’m back to blogging…..

Well, to begin with, I thought of writing a customary post about the past one semester (something on the lines of this one…) but somehow I don’t feel like reliving the past 3 months! Not because they’ve been the most terrible ones I’ve ever had to go through, but at the same time, they have, in no way, turned out to be like I expected… So I am considering myself memory charmed for the past 3 months and moving on…

Cut to the present. And this is probably the most amazing time I have ever had in a long long time. Doing nothing is really a privilege these days. And I’ve also discovered that I’m an expert at doing that, without actually feeling an iota of guilt !! ;-)

Some valuable revelations:

- Playing ‘Life’ and ‘Uno’ is fun….wonder why I never played it more often before !!

- You don’t always have to read big, fat books that are high on literary quotient. One hour of the good ol’ Tinkle comics helps one to clear one’s thoughts !! Really !

- Mushy movies can be enjoyed tremendously even when you don’t have ‘someone’ to watch them with you… And they don’t leave you feeling all sappy in the end… How can a person not love While You Were Sleeping….its BEAUTIFUL !!!!

- My cat has learnt some really new antics, which I wasn’t aware of, till now!

- Its fun to stay up till 3 at night… Especially if you’re chatting with old school friends after months…

- Eating platefuls of bhajis and drinking tea on Sinhagad after a (hard?!) climb is a different feeling in itself…

- Same goes for getting wet in the first pre-monsoon showers!

- I haven’t listened to genuine ghost stories crammed up in a car at 8:00 pm, on the drive back from Sinhagad….ever !! Thanks Pari…

- I can effortlessly talk absolute gibberish with Akshay for on hour on the phone, and actually feel good about it in the end… :-P

- I rock at teaching… I could teach my sister Gravitation in one hour flat, and actually enjoy it much more than I did during my 12th !!

- Doing 30 lunges with 5 kg weights IS an accomplishment !! :-P

I guess this is what Gau means when she talks about ‘ayushyatlya chotya chotya goshtit ananda ghene’ (Translating specially for Anup, that means- taking pleasures in the smaller things in life…)

Now frankly speaking, I’m not very much of a ‘living-for-the-moment’ kinda person. Never have really understood the meaning of this philosophy. How can a person not think about what happens next?! But now I know that there’s a different kind of happiness in just setting yourself free at times.. :)

2006-02-11T06:39:00.000-05:00

The funny thing about life is that just when you think you're all done, zilch, over and out....it shows you the most shimmering ray of hope that tells you, "Hey! Its not over yet.... You got more to you than just that !!!!"

And Month Six...

2006-02-08T09:11:00.000-05:00

A low-down on the months that were:

- Semester 1 of T.Y.B.Tech has ended successfully !!

- For the first time ever, I got through a whole semester without submitting a single bunksheet, and having more than 70% attendance !! And this IS a big deal !! ;-)

- PIET is back to COEP !! Hurray !! Actually it’s PIET’s COEP now….but whatever…

- Finally zeroed down on Finite Element Method (FEM) as an elective. Decision was based more on elimination of other elective options. Added attraction to chose FEM was that it has computer programming… Hoping it doesn’t turn out to be a let down….

- Submissions got done on time, and we survived the ordeal…through numerous purple glitter pens, Lexi black refills and night-maraoing !! The thrill and satisfaction of holding our first, 93 page, entirely hand written TOM journal was unbeatable !! So much so, that Gau, Gaya and I have a brilliant snap of us holding it, right before final submission, like it were our graduation certificate !! :) The list of disaster management skills we’d learnt at COEP just got bigger !!

- Survived through the five orals too !! Right from discussing ergonomic considerations involved in designing a chair to suffering a near blank-out before ICE orals to bearing Shewatkar’s atrocities…I’ve done it all !!

- Mini project was the coolest !! My dear uncle and Productivity Aids Pvt. Ltd came to the rescue, and voila! We had a leakage testing fixture used in AC units of cars adorning our ME journal. Thanks Mamu !!

- Somehow Barron’s didn’t seem so bad anymore !! That’s the best thing about having a passion for languages! The incomparable thrill of learning new words supersedes the mammoth task of learning 5000 of them !! About the actual GRE….don’t really want to get into it !! Got a 1410, which is ‘pretty good’, ‘sufficient for mechanical’, and even ‘awesome’, according to people !! The funniest thing about being the first one to give GRE in the new year is that news of your score spreads around the whole campus as if it’s the latest alleged link-up to hit Bollywood !! ;-) Even I was amazed at the number of people who knew that I was done with THE GRE in the 21 hours before I stepped into college next day !! But yeah…the good thing about being done with it is that life is finally back to normal…GRE is no more a reason not to do Fervor, Firodiya, Gathering, Zest etc etc…. But nonetheless, I had fun studying for it….

And finally….I’m back to blogging !! Can’t imagine what kept me away from it for six months….not that nothing exciting happened, just that nothing was exciting enough !! :-) And I had the GRE….so………. ;-)

Month One...

2005-08-08T08:53:00.000-04:00

[Disclaimer: Its been nearly a month since I wrote my last blogpost. The long period away from blogging and the numerous activities that have taken place in the past one month, have resulted in a post that a tad too long than its meant to be. Niri...and others...I beg for forgiveness...I can't help it !!]

The past one month has been nothing less than a rollercoaster ride !! Most importantly, the Third Year of Mechanical Engineering at COEP has finally begun, and boy...its been way more shocking than I expected it to be !! Of course, I had heard from loads of my brilliant senior friends about how 'true' engineering begins at Third Year level und so weite...but that it would begin right from the first day of T.Y.B.Tech (Maaz !!) was a real shocker !!

Shock No 1: For the first time, probably in the history of COEP, lectures began right from the 'theoretical' first day of college. In the sense, it is an understood fact for years now, that when the COEP notice board says: 'College re-opens on 4th July', no one is supposed to even step into the classroom before 20th July, at the earliest. But lo and behold...we enter college on 4th and news spreads that Mech I has a lecture in Room 11 !! What the hell ??!! What's wrong with people ??!!

And that, my friend, was just the begining...

Shock No 2: Dale enters class. I mean, OK we need to attend lectures on the first day of college after a billiant two month vacation, but DALE ??!! Could it get worse than this? And of course, as expected...he went on to lecture us on how we are at a very crucial stage in our lives where everything we do will have a direct impact on our placements, and consequently our careers. And of course, how we should stop acting like 'Pariksharthi' or 'Exam -Givers' (Doesn't he LOVE that word ??!!) and learn more, to bettter our knowledge. And how in the true sense, placements don't really determine our careers, because it's only when we face such setbacks, that we learn to dream beyond our limitations and earn a better life. And how the Indian parents determine that their child should become an engineer and earn a salary of 20 grand, right from the time he enters this big bad world (Khara mhantla tar, 'pair'ents chi hi attitude ach chukichi aahe !!) Christ !! Attending lectures on the first day of college was bad enough, now we have to bear up with the same ol' ghisa-pita, das bar doharaya hua lecture, which I now know better than the working of a 4-stroke petrol engine !!

Shock No 3: We have electives to take next semester. Options are: Finite Element Method, Refrigeration and Air-Conditioning, Analysis and Synthesis of Mechanisms, Tribology, Non-Conventional Energy Resources. Do we understand anything of anything? NO. So how do we decide what elective to take? DON'T KNOW. Present status: After a not-exactly-fruitful talk with Dale (!!), we have zeroed down on FEM and RAC as options. Still waiting for Mangesh to arrive in Pune...some expert guidance is necessary !! Seniors..HELP !!

Shock No 4: NO PRINTED JOURNALS THIS TIME !! This was, by far, the worst shock ever. That implies sitting up late nights writing gibberish on one side ruled papers. That implies more work. That implies havoc !! Why introduce printed journals in 'autonomous COEP' (Damn the B.Tech !!) when you're gonna get bored of typing them for us, in 2 years ??!! Right now, one ICE and MD assignment and one 35-page (and 42 with my handwriting) Carburetors submission later, the grave reality has dawned upon us...its tougher than it seems. Ok the true COEP-ians sat up one night and wrote the whole journal out, but we just can't do that ! We have weekly submissions, which are graded the next week, and so we need to do them WELL !! Enter purple sparkle pen, 5 hours of sleep before the BIG day (and 20 minutes, if you're Gaya), GT, good handwriting, and if you're Akshay then colouring your diagrams to get a 10/10...the works. Anyway we are getting the hang of it soon enough.....after all, we have no choice now !!

Shock No 5: Five practicals !! Isn't there a 'standardised limit' for the extent to which a department can screw its students ??!!

Shock No 6: Chowgule tells us that we have a mini-project in MP, where we have to design a jig/fixture for some component which has to be given to us by a company. And the 2-D drawing of the component is to be submitted in a week. Hang on.....WHAT is a jig and fixture ??

Anyway, College done, we began our first GRE Dilip Oak class that evening at 7. Day 1, greeted by Mr. Atul Londhe.

Shock No 7: GRE has tough words !! Ok, so I never expected it to be a cakewalk, but words like vexillology, discombobulated, ameliorate are.....Martian ??!! In D.O.'s words, 'words that we've never heard before, and will never hear again once GRE is done !!'

Shock No 8: AWM is weird !! Its not the stupid kind of writing, like we do while posting on blogs. Here we need to understand, analyse and present in logical order, with fast typing, good language and correct grammar. When has so much thought-process gone into writing an essay ??

Shock No 9: I've forgotten Math. Day 1 of Analytical, and Gauri and I couldn't solve a Sets problem. Dammit ! That's 9th grade syllabus !! I came home and asked my sister to give me her school textbooks. One hour of revision, and things were back on track..

Anyways, the initials shocks had done their job...we were terrified about the days to come !!

Fortunately for us, the Gods decided we were getting too hard a deal. Second week onwards, things were more relaxed !! The off-lectures, off-practicals made their way for the usual timepass. CCD-going, Softy-eating on F.C.Road, Dumb-C playing on BC, Dare-giving to Omkar to tell fat-belly girl on BC that she's wearing disgusting clothes (which he didn't do ultimately !!), gandao-ing Akshay, Gaya getting new cell (finally !!)...all of that rubbish !! A beautiful Wednesday morning, an off MD practical and two over-enthusiastic friends for company (Read: Gau and Gaya) resulted in we watching Dus at E-square, 9:30 am show, first row 40 bucks seats !! And the enthusiasm prevailed even after the movie, so we topped it up with two chocolate mousses and a spicy chana chaat !! Rains played havoc in everyone else's lives, but for us, it was heaven-sent. COEP closed for 4 days !! BC waters had reached an all-time high...the sight was phenomenal !! (Photo below) Can you imagine BC being closed for students, because of perilious levels of Mula waters ??!! Election season arrived soon enough. Again the campaigning, distributing panel members' lists, strategising, serious meetings with Pranjal after D.O....and more lectures to bunk !! :-) The mini-project problem was solved by a visit to my uncle's jig and fixture factory with Gau and Gaya. Was an awesome experience. Finally got to see real jigs and fixtures. Now we're armed with two components, given by my uncle, for which we have to design a fixture. Interesting work...

GRE class was awesome fun !! Our Verbal Prof., Mr. Mukul Hinge knows everything of everything !! From Coppernicus to Desert Rose by Sting. (Did anyone know, by the way, that when Sting sings Desert Rose, he is refering to his dream sweetheart, who, like a rose in the desert, is an illusion ?!) And he has to begin every sentence with 'Okay Engineers....' and end it with a '...., Right ?' Londhe is good too. And of course we have Vicky's wife, Mrs. Chitnis, teaching us too !! ;-)

All in all....finally life is back to normal again !! :-):-)

From A Beautiful Mind...

2005-06-28T13:36:00.000-04:00

"Queer little twists and quirks go into the making of an individual. To suppress them all and follow clock and calendar and creed until the individual is lost in the neutral gray of the host is to be less than true to our inheritance….
Life, that gorgeous quality of life, is not accomplished by following another man’s rules. It is true we have the same hungers and same thirsts, but they are for different things and in different ways and in different ways and in different seasons….Lay down your own day, follow it to its noon, your own noon, or you will sit in an outer hall listening to the chimes, but never reaching high enough to strike your own...."

----------------------------------

I read the above extract in 'The Beautiful Mind'. The moment I read it, I fell in love with it. Liked it so much that I had even put it up on my Orkut profile till a few days ago. Thought of posting it here.

Dunno what to title it

2005-06-28T13:16:00.000-04:00

The previous post I wrote created quite a stir among my friends. They asked me what was wrong. I gave it a thought yesterday…wondered why I wrote those two lines….and I couldn’t explain why !! Dunno…but it does happen sometimes right, that everything really is ok, as normal as things could possibly get, but yet something somewhere just doesn’t seem right !!

I read this in RD someday- When a person thinks his memories outweigh his dreams, then has grown old. I think I’m growing old. I think I’m allowing my past to take over my present. I think I’m trying too hard to forget certain incidents of my life, and its just not helping…I’m getting pulled into it even more !!

It is not a very nice feeling to be 20 years old and not really have anything substantial to account for, in those years. And it’s not at all a nice feeling to know that half the goals I set for myself, have remained unaccomplished.

The HSC results got out a few days back….ok…quite a many days back. I remembered the day my HSC result was declared. And was I disappointed !! And why? A 92.5% aggregate and 96% PCM wasn’t quite a bad result. But I had missed the Merit rank by 4 marks…and THAT hurt ! Because a Merit Rank was what I had wanted ever since I came to know of its existence. The Rank didn’t matter anyways- two months after the result, and it all was forgotten. I forgot the entire incident too. But the result day reminded me of it, after a whole 2 years. And it hurt yet again !!

I’m planning to give my GRE in March 2006. Took admission in Dilip Oak’s Academy. But I just realized that my English is not as good as I thought it to be. In fact it’s deteriorating at an exponential rate !! That’s a scary thought….

Scary reminds me…Gauri thinks my posts are scary. I don’t think so. At least they’re not meant to evoke those kind of responses. Maybe that’s the kind of stuff one tends to write when one is confused….but scary ??!!

I don't know what I have written in the above paragraphs. I hope I haven't scared anyone !! :-)

But all that gibberish that I have typed away, has certainly made me feel much better !! Its true- Writing is therapeutic.......

Tough

2005-06-21T04:39:00.000-04:00

They say "Tough times don't last, tough people do"

Maybe I'm just not tough enough.......

Its all in the stars.....

2005-06-04T14:52:00.000-04:00

My mom’s just back from her quarterly visit to the astrologer. This is probably the fifth one she’s visiting in the past 3 years. Each one of them is either an incarnation of some blessed priest or has been granted with unique intuitive capabilities. And of course, each has their own say on what the stars have in store for us. I remember my mom dragged me along to one such lady, during my twelfth board exams, and she told me to stay away from people whose names begin with P and H, as they would be detrimental to my progress. (Readers beware !!) Another gave me a ring to wear in my index finger, to improve my concentration. The latest news is that I would be married before March 2007, and to be event-specific, that is before I even graduate !! Abhi tak zindagi main kisi ladke ka thikana nahi hai, shaadi to door ki baat hai !! ;-);-)

We find these kinds of ‘readers of the stars’ everywhere. Some sit with fortune cards and parrots on footpaths, while others charge 2000 bucks for a one-hour consultation. Some help the average middle class Indian wife deal with growing demands of her family, while others lend an advisory hand to Page 3 regulars !! Whatever it may be, they sure have people eating out of their hands !!

And of course, the objects used for the predictions are varied too- there are the sun signs, the moon signs, the Chinese calendar symbols, some read the positions of the stars while you were born, while others ask you to change the way you spell your name, some read your face, some analyze handwritings, while some pick tarot cards- but all of them sure have something to say about your future !! Pune Times goes a step ahead and tells you about how good a roomie you are, how you’d like your first date to be, and even how good a kisser you are, all on the basis of the sun sign you belong to !! Probably I should ask a guy who’s kissed two girls of the same sun sign to vouch for that one !! ;-)

Talking about astrology specifically, I do know that it is a very ancient science, though I never have bothered to delve into the scientific aspects of stargazing. But frankly, I really am not very sure about the credibility of this science. Do positions of stars really determine our lives? Can changing the way we spell our name divert ‘negative energies’ around us and make our lives happy? Do our ‘haath ki rekhaein’ have our future written in them already? Then probably it is not wrong to have a fatalist attitude- after all, we don’t entirely become accountable for the doings in our lives. It is, after all, inevitable !!

The many people I’ve spoken to, about this, tell me- “The best way out of it is to do your work with utmost sincerity and give each task your 100%. Take each day as it comes. The rest, leave to the Lord. After all, He is the Caretaker of the Universe.” Seems logical. Then what about the atheists? They do not believe in the Supreme Power. They believe that they control their lives entirely. That they are responsible for every action and every decision they make. Are they being foolhardy then?

Too many questions, and no convincing answers. Of course I know that there needs to be a balance struck between the two. I cannot possibly expect to do well in my exams just by wearing a lucky colour, and using a lucky pen, if I refuse to open my books and get my ass down to work. Besides, I’m definitely not going to stop driving if someone tells me I am prone to accidents in a particular week. But personally, I have always viewed astrology and its affiliated branches from a more experimental point of view. I mean, I do read the daily forecast frequently (in Pune Times !!), but only to see if it works. Fortunately or unfortunately, I’ve not come across a single day, as yet, when the predictions of Mr. Anupam Kapil have worked.

But it is just so tragic that there are so many people all over, who are nearly obsessed with these practices. Probably knowing of any sort of impending disasters serve as release valves for the anxiety-laden minds of some people. (Chalo, balaa talee !!) Probably a better alternative would be to concentrate more on your deeds and actions. Cause I bet the good you do to people around you would definitely pay you better returns than adding an extra ‘A’ to your first name !!

Touché !!

Of desserts and Cafe Mocha

2005-05-26T13:43:00.001-04:00

I happened to see this amazing feature on Discovery Travel and Living on the most amazingly mouth-watering varieties of desserts and ice creams in America. The programme showcased every ice cream parlor, right from the world-wide known brands like Baskin Robbins, Dairy Queen (with its trademark curl on top of the cone !!) and then went on to even the exclusive and exotic brands like Michelle’s Ice creams, which offer unimaginable varieties like avocado, this place called Ben and Jerry’s and lots others !!

My personal favourite was the ‘Dairy Queen Blizzard’. An absolutely sumptuous concoction of ice cream, nuts, cream, chocolate or butter scotch sauce, and any other add-on that you may fancy, all whipped up into this creamy sundae, so thick, that it doesn’t budge an inch even on completely inverting the huge glass it is served in !!
No guesses that it is an absolutely rage at the DQ’s all over….now that’s one thing I have to get my hands on, when I reach the US…in the next 2 or 3 years !! :-P:-P

Definitely was the kind of show that grows onto you with every passing minute, and definitely left ME begging for more !!

Reminds me of the most amazing dessert experience I’ve ever had…..This was in January 2005. Gau, Gaya and I had gone for the IIT Techfest at Powai. It was the perfect setting- T1 was just done with, and it was our first impromptu trip together !! I’m not going to go into the details of the Techfest- this post is not meant for that, all I can say is- It was absolutely awe-inspiring !! Now I know why an IIT is an IIT !! Everything about it is so larger than life…a 50 lakh event, a McLaren on display, Humanoid robots specially flown down for a soccer match (But frankly, that one event was a letdown, the AIBO Robots at Fervor 2004 were MUCH real, the Humanoids didn’t exactly kick the ball !!), international level participation at Yantriki, the Drishti exhibition for the blind…all of it was just too astounding…add to that the entire IIT experience- the Powai lake, the Coffee Shack, carom at the boys hostel, the sight of whole lot of technology hungry wannabe engineers trying to grasp the most of the vast ocean of knowledge on display at the Fest, the IIT boys (I didn’t see any girls) who knew exactly how to have fun while they learn- way beyond my comprehension…and in fact, a tad too intimidating….

Coming back to the dessert…Now after the technological empowering we had experienced at the Techfest, it was time for some much needed diversion to other necessary recreational activities…so off we were- 3 girls and 9 guys- for some pet pooja, to this coffee shop called Mocha, at the Hiranandani complex, a stone’s throw away from IIT. From what I know of cafes at Pune, dessert aficionados here have to make do with simple pastries or doughnuts, and that’s exactly why this place was different !! To begin with, the most amazing thing about this place was its hatke ambience. Everything from the glasses to the furniture, to spoons, to the amazingly comfortable cushions and diwans, was uniquely mismatched…you know, high tables, low chairs, tribal masks hanging all over, no particular theme to the art work put up. Created a charm unparalled by anything I've seen so far. Makes you take an instant liking to it !!

And the menu…now that’s what deserves a noteworthy mention. And though Akshay did insist that even the water at Mocha is ‘really good’, I wouldn’t quite like to comment on that, and go straight to the dessert section. The picture below must have already given you a fair idea of what to expect. Well, firstly the variety they have to offer is so extensive, that it takes ages to decide what to order. Finally after much discussion, Gaya settled for a Chocolate Avalanche (what you see on the right, in the pic), and certainly an avalanche it was !! A sinful combination of cubes of brownies, ice cream, chocolate sauce and choco chip cookies, and the one you see in the pic was the smaller version !! But what I treated myself to- was the one on the left in the pic and it is called the ‘Vertigo’ (which Gau and I shared) I swear I will award half my kingdom to anyone to gets me something as soft, succulent and sumptuous as this !! Every spoonful just melts in your mouth and you just can’t stop eating it till you’re down to the last bite !! Icing on the cake- that beautiful swirl of frozen chocolate sauce on top !!

Add to that, the company of friends, absolute freedom to throw the cushions around till you’ve found you’re comfort zone (we guys were near horizontal on the diwans !!), the occasional conversion of the coffee shop to a dance floor and the whole atmosphere filled with joie de vivre !! Truly an experience to cherish !! Blends so beautifully with the Mocha slogan- Come in, Make life wait, Take a twenty minute vacation !!

------

P.S.- The whole experience did burn a little hole in our pockets…but hello..it was our vacation !! ;-);-)

The waiters at Mocha did say that they were contemplating an outlet in Pune. What can I say- they have their first set of customers all waiting eagerly in queue !!

------