tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-115523322024-03-13T15:20:22.429-04:00With a Twist...It's a magical world, Hobbes, ol' buddy...
Let's go exploring!Unknownnoreply@blogger.comBlogger105125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-30133131076036510042017-05-01T04:12:00.001-04:002017-05-01T04:12:09.259-04:00New Blog!<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
Hey, Thanks for stopping by my blog!<br />
I now blog at <a href="https://purplerain24.wordpress.com/">https://purplerain24.wordpress.com/</a><br />
Would love for you to check out my new blog and share with your friends!<br />
<br />
Love Always,<br />
Suparna</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-91127493943528073492012-11-21T14:19:00.000-05:002012-11-21T14:21:14.218-05:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<blockquote class="tr_bq">
"I don't have the poetry that you do. So your longing seems greater than mine. But it's not..."</blockquote>
<br />
How I wish I had the ability to compose a <i>sher</i> or a poem for every moment of unbridled joy, deepest despair, maddening passion, mind-numbing helplessness or soulful calmness I have experienced...<br />
<br />
Perhaps, then, you would truly understand the rhythm of my heartbeat...<br />
<br />
Perhaps, then, you could comprehend every grain of my existence...<br />
<br />
And maybe, just maybe, choosing would be a lot easier...<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>-Aaliya</i></div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-34136258099500371942012-09-29T18:34:00.000-04:002012-09-29T18:34:25.517-04:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
<i>"Sometimes we reach a point where, in order to move on, we have to wipe the slate clean.." - The Beaver</i><br />
<br />
I've reached that point. Need to clean the slate. Have to make a new beginning...<br />
<br />
But some idiot wrote on it with a permanent marker! Can someone seriously be that stupid? How do you not realize how destructive it can be! How do I clean this crap now?<br />
<br />
Help! :-O</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-92017961495656890972012-09-21T07:01:00.001-04:002012-09-21T12:51:31.801-04:00From Summer to Fall..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
You know the seasons are changing when the Starbucks lady stops asking you if you want your White Chocolate Mocha hot or iced..(the idea of iced WCM doesn't make sense in any case, but that's a different topic). Coffee Specials shift from Frapuccinos to Pumpkin Spice Lattes. Grocery store sales move from barbecue paraphernalia to Halloween decorations.<br />
<br />
Nature follows a more gradual approach to ease us into the change. You may need a light jacket when you leave for work at 7 AM but you still get enough heat the rest of the day to let you believe it's still part-summer. The sun sets an hour early, but makes up for that by treating you to these brilliant hues of orange and red splashed across the sky so you can enjoy your drive back home. Trees shed their leaves but before they wither away, (if you're on the East Coast) you get to marvel at the most spectacular Fall colors you'll ever see.. There's a perfect balance in everything.. Always a yin to the yang..<br />
<br />
Wouldn't it be nice if life was the same way? If everything was proportionate and justified? If the good came with the bad so that it didn't seem so impossible to bear.. There's something wrong in the design of the universe for sure. Right?<br />
<br />
Or maybe we make it hard by adding our own variables to an already complex equation. Maybe we get too close to the expected outcome, not knowing how to accept any other alternative. Maybe things would be a lot simpler if we were all like Gautam Buddha- maintain a safe distance - from everyone and everything. No attachment = no pain. How simple can the equation get! Now if only someone deconstructed the "no attachment" part.. :P<br />
<br />
As you get older, you tend to contemplate a lot on how you have lived your life- the decisions you made, the people you trusted, the paths you chose to follow. How did you land up where you are? Was it the most ethical and fair decision you could have made at that point? <br />
<br />
What if you step back for a minute and think about the decisions you did NOT make, the people you did NOT trust and the paths you chose NOT to follow.. Would the story of your life have been any different? What exciting adventures did you miss out on? Or maybe you were saved from a destructive avalanche! Could it have gotten better or did you escape something worse? Or maybe life doesn't work that way- maybe all paths lead to the same unknown, elusive destination.. Maybe you eventually land up exactly where you're supposed to be- its just a question of choosing country roads where you get to enjoy the slow drive, or taking the express-way..<br />
<br />
The seasons are changing for sure.. A whole summer has gone by- what have I missed..<br />
A comeback post that has more questions than answers- that's not a good sign..</div>
Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-20840539987122901682012-04-22T21:11:00.001-04:002012-04-22T21:12:37.721-04:00The Man in the Arena and Other Thoughts..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">
This was probably the worst Sundays I have ever experienced in a very very long time.. I'm not going to get into the reasons because that would mean using the blog as a Dear Diary and I want to try to avoid doing that as far as possible.. The world is not interested in my sappy stories, right? Anyway, so let me instead try the thing where I use writing as a means to lay out my myriad thoughts one by one in an attempt to deconstruct the mesh in my head. A Pensieve sounds fancier than a Dear Diary, eh? :-)<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 1]</b><br />
<br />
Today was one of those days where I realized how unpredictable life is. Not that I didn't know that before, but sometimes things happen that make the brutal reality of the situation take over your whole existence like an avalanche. Makes me wonder why the universe is designed in this way, though. Why is it that perfect moments seem to end so quickly whereas the worse phases seem to linger on forever?! Why is it that just when we have taken out our Lazy-boy and decided that we deserve to rest for a measly five minutes, we are called to the war-front all over again? Now don't give me the crap about learning to appreciate the good while it lasts! Just for today, I am tired of being grateful and learning to smell the roses and counting my blessings. It sounds very Oprah-like and I don't like her! :-P<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 2]</b><br />
<br />
Expectations. They say, if you want to learn to be happy, lower your expectations. In a disturbing way, that is true, especially of people. We expect from people we care about the most. We expect them to make us part of their life. We expect them to understand us and be there for us without being told. We expect them to stand up for us, to support us and to love us even when we are at our worst. But very few people are lucky enough to get someone who matches these expectations. Which is where all the problems arise. Of course, the easiest thing to do is to just be yourself and let others be themselves too. Accept people for who they really are instead of making them match the mould you have created in your mind about that relationship.<br />
<br />
The same goes with life. I remember this TED talk I heard by Sir Ken Robinson where he says that we need to <i>dis-enthrall</i> ourselves from the natural order of things in order to really bring about a change. So true, right! Breaking away from the patterns we have created in our minds is the only way to allow new ones to take their place. But why is it that the sanest solutions are always the hardest to implement?<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 3]</b><br />
<br />
How many of you believe that we are always given signs which let us know whether we are on the right path or not? A dear friend and I were talking about it once- she was about to make a very big move from place A to place B and was in two minds about it. And somehow since the past few weeks, random things just kept falling into place in B and falling out of place in A - which was sort of a sign that it is indeed time to move. I have experienced that once before too.. Just one more element of mystery in the design of this universe, I say..<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 4]</b><br />
<br />
I was talking to this guy and he was telling me about the girl he is dating. He seemed to like her a lot. But in the course of our conversation about many things- he happened to mention how much he hates a particular profession, which coincidentally turned out to be her profession. Then he mentioned that he hates products of a particular company, which turns out to be the very same company she works for! I don't think he realized this, but it kind of hit me in an odd way. I know your profession isn't your life, but it does form a very large part of your day-to-day existence, right. In such a situation, how can you truly admire a person if you don't respect their profession?! Imagine talking to your partner about his/her day at work while in your head you detest the amount of money he/she makes because of their stupid degree or because you think the work they do is not at all significant! Is that okay, or are my ideas a little too idealistic for the real world?! :-)<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 5]</b><br />
<br />
This one has been bothering me for a few days now. I was playing chess with this person; and let me tell you, it is not a game I am very good at, simply because I have probably played it six times my entire life. Anyway, so I lost the two games I played with him and while he was teaching me what I did wrong, he told me he had understood "my game" in the first few moves I made. Two things he said - One, I am always waiting for the opponent to make their move and then trying to defend instead of attacking first. And sometimes in a game, offense is the best defense. Second, I never make my opponent think about what I am trying to do. Now I don't want to swear by this guy's analysis of my game-playing skills, but what he said somehow made me wonder about whether I incorporate the same strategies in life too? If yes, then there are some drastic changes I need to make.. I have always loved this quote by Theodore Roosevelt -<i> "It is
not the critic who counts.
It
is not the man who sits and points out
how
the doer of deeds could have done things better
and
how he falls and stumbles.
The
credit goes to the man in the arena whose
face is marred
with
dust and blood and sweat.
But
when he's in the arena,
at
best he wins,and
at worst he loses,
but
when he fails, when he loses,
he
does so daring greatly." </i>Am I this Man in the Arena...?
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-57371154333829074312012-04-20T05:50:00.001-04:002012-04-20T05:56:22.355-04:00A Measuring Stick for Life?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">I am a scheduler by profession. According to my boss, they founded our group in my company about seven years ago because they needed people who would be trained to look at the big picture, instead of always trying to temporarily work around issues as they came, which is what Operations tends to do habitually in a company of this size. So essentially, an important part of my job is to think of how what we do today, impacts our tomorrow. If I fire people today because I am over-staffed, will I need them three months later? If I work overtime this weekend, will we be out of work next week? Things like that.. And for problems we notice to be repeatable or significant in nature, we know the issue needs a much deeper analysis - for this we seek the help of the Industrial Engineer - which is what I am by training.<br />
<br />
You know one of the main reasons I like IE - it is because, by principle, IE's are supposed to be the fix-it people- which is something I have always loved to be! IE's have tools for everything- to determine root cause of a problem, to predict and account for inherent risks to a process, to determine how things are supposed to be versus how they are, to eliminate non-value added activities in a process, even to study human behavior. They may not always be effective in the first go, but if applied correctly, can really help lay out all the pieces of the jigsaw.<br />
<br />
If you think about it, the above skill-sets are exactly what is required to solve all of life's complexities!<br />
Make a new friend? - okay, look at the big picture - is this relationship going to be a season pass, or is it a lifetime membership? Invest your resources accordingly.<br />
Trust too often and too soon? - make an Ishikawa diagram of what is wrong with your own brain that makes you do that - fix the root cause, and your failure rate will drop.<br />
<br />
I understand that mastering the above techniques to, what crazed psychologists call, "<i>whole-hearted living</i>", would essentially make us akin to God - but hell, what if we all had a few God-like qualities? Okay, if not a lifelong plan, even the ability to foresee the next one year would be appreciated by many a humans, don't you think?! Life's mysteries be damned! :P<br />
<br />
Talking of psychologists - people doing research in psychology, every-day human behavior and interpretation, social work, happiness (yes! people do research in happiness too!) like to come up with verbiage for what they think gives people a "sense of fulfillment" in life. I've heard of words like connection, compassion, vulnerability, choice, courage, purpose, meaning etc etc. Well, it's 2.15 AM on a Friday morning and my head is swirling with a ragoût of unasked questions, unwanted answers, questionable actions and unanswerable reactions; and I can come up with only two things every human being seeks out in this lifetime -<br />
1. To be seen, <i>really seen</i>.<br />
2. To know they are not alone.<br />
<br />
If only someone invested their time and research grants on figuring out tools, real concrete tools, that would help us do that instead of beating about the bush all the time. If only we didn't have to untangle the mess and pave the path by ourselves all the time...</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-56804020823978561222012-03-20T04:22:00.000-04:002012-03-20T04:22:42.886-04:00When you are home..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">What is it that makes a place, home?<br />
<br />
Every year, I go to India in December- it is almost like a yearly ritual, like a pilgrimage I must complete. I enter the Bombay airport (which I still call Sahar International; I can never get around to calling it Chhatrapati Shivaji International Terminus.. :P) and always find myself smiling all through Immigration, Baggage Claim and Customs, because I see the inherent Indianness of all the people come to the fore- the usual cutting of lines to be the first in the queue or fighting for every square inch of space around the baggage carousel- it is not irritating or strange, it is just the way it is supposed to be. As I exit the airport, I scan the crowd for a pair of hands waving frantically to attract my attention- my dad who painstakingly tracks my flight all through the seventeen hour journey, and arrives at the airport half an hour before the plane is supposed to land- even though he knows that the formalities do end up taking more than an hour. We hug, he takes the trolley from my hand and makes ten calls to the rented car driver announcing my arrival and asking him to pick us up. It has been the exact same routine now, four years in a row. It would actually be strange if this were to not happen some year- because this, the very essence of this moment, is what I call home.<br />
<br />
Somehow airports have a way of letting you know instantly whether you are welcome or not.. Knowing that you are returning to a place where there is someone waiting for you; knowing that your arrival brings a smile to someone's face - that is what makes a place, home <br />
<br />
Moving away from Rochester was one of the most-needed and necessary decisions of my life. But regardless of everything, this was a place which taught me all there was to learn about myself and about people - it showed me the best and worst of situations and it also tolerated me through my own best and worst. Knowing that a place has seen you in your nicest, meanest, friendliest, angriest, happiest, saddest, proudest, weakest moments and still accepts you the way you are - still helps you discover the cafe with the best coffee, or the cutest bookstore, or yummiest pastries for those midnight cravings - that is what makes a place, home.<br />
<br />
I think we are all on a quest to find our own home. To find the place or those people that make you feel as if you belong, as if you are wanted. But in the face of the unknown and uncertain, how do we know we have reached our destination? Is it truly a matter of chemistry - sometimes the missing pieces of the jigsaw just fit - and you keep going until you have completed the puzzle? Or is it a matter of trained acceptance - learning to make a place your home; learning to nest and see the beauty in imperfection?<br />
<br />
How do you know you are home? When the wandering mind beckons and urges you to move on, how do you know that it is time to stop?</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-59277004518910873242012-03-07T02:17:00.000-05:002012-03-07T02:17:28.698-05:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">A handmade greeting card.<br />
A phone call from a colleague to your boss, just to tell him you're doing a good job.<br />
A weekly SMS from a friend from another continent asking about your day.<br />
Reliving happy days from the summer.<br />
The comfort in familiarity.<br />
<br />
Whoever said it was the big things that count! Most people lead crazy, hectic, busy lives with a thousand things to accomplish each day. But even in the madness of it all, the ones who <i>choose</i> to take out <i>five minutes</i> for you- those are the people that matter; those are the people for whom <i>you matter</i>...<br />
<br />
Weekends tend to be very contemplative nowadays - I guess the week goes by so fast that there is suddenly a lot of time to think without work! The good thing about that is that I'm learning to appreciate solitude- which I think everyone should know to do. The downside though, is that the introspection is often about where I am versus where I thought I would be! And as a rule, human tendency is to never be happy with the present!<br />
<br />
Oh well... As always, Calvin says it best...<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tG4xbEBK1KE/T1cK9-yBj0I/AAAAAAAAJjc/rGQ6kolF1Ks/s1600/425577_10150505322906582_682701581_9116143_2109651750_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-tG4xbEBK1KE/T1cK9-yBj0I/AAAAAAAAJjc/rGQ6kolF1Ks/s320/425577_10150505322906582_682701581_9116143_2109651750_n.jpg" width="320" /></a></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-70321090999673812092012-02-24T12:27:00.006-05:002012-02-25T20:03:44.286-05:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">When a lonely bird walked the sands of (what is now) Wyoming, 125 million years ago, he did not know that his seemingly insignificant parakeet-like foot prints would one day be an exhibit in one of the largest museums of natural history in the world; and people would be staring at the piece of metamorphosed rock he once walked on, enclosed in a glass box, with confused amazement. The foot-long bird was probably only trying to understand how to be strong enough to survive in a world of dinosaurs.<br />
<br />
Jupiter is up there in the Solar System with his 63 (source: Siri) / 64 (source: Wiki) / 66 (source: astronomer in Cal Academy of Sciences) moons, trying to make sure they all exist as one happy family. Little does he know that every day actual living people on a planet called Earth, not too far away from where he is, are looking at him through some ancient asteroid-like telescope, amazed at the fact that they can see not one, but four of his moons at the same time!<br />
<br />
The point being - the world is an unfathomable, highly-randomized, yet probabilistic experiment which we mortals think is controlled, but no one has been able to provide evidence to that effect yet. In a place of such realities which we cannot even perceive, who is to say where the tiny experiments we run on a day-to-day basis will take us?<br />
<br />
Ten years down the line, I could own a famous patisserie/cafe in downtown Manhattan..<br />
I could also have my own travel show on Discovery, where I get paid to travel where I want and take a thousand pictures a day..<br />
One day, some publishing guy could read this blog and think that I am decently talented enough to write a book that is <i>NOT</i> about a conservative girl from a small town in India, who learns the ways of the world in the big bad city (which seems to be a recurring theme among first-time female Indian authors)..<br />
Or maybe one day I could finally get to do research on the psychological complexities of the brain which make people do what they do and behave the way they behave..<br />
And finally, I could get to give a talk at a TED conference...<br />
<br />
On a day that is singularly significant because it's my birthday, who is stopping me from wishing for one of these wishes to come true, as I blow the candles on my cake?<br />
<br />
The world is highly randomized, after all.....and I aced my Design of Experiments course... :):)<br />
<br />
Happy Birthday to Me !! :)</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-20027288538130517752012-02-14T03:31:00.001-05:002012-02-14T03:39:36.929-05:00The Tale of the Juju<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">It all started when my cousin told me about ten years ago about how wishing on a <i>sardarji</i> brings you good luck. We were sitting in the Mumbai local train, when she saw a <i>sardarji</i> uncle enter the train with his family- she instantly turned to me with her index and middle finger interlocked and in all the seriousness of a sixteen year old, asked me to tap on her head thrice and "release" the lock! Were turbaned, <i>paratha</i>-eating, big-hearted Punjabi gentlemen around when the east-Africans invented this "sacred ritual" while dancing around a holy pyre in the wee hours of a full moon night chanting "<i>Obala obala....!!</i>" Who knows! But for my sister, this was the best and only form of juju she knew!<br />
<br />
I, as it turns out, am an even bigger juju-believing junkie than she is, because I took the story a step further. Don't laugh, because this is important. So, there is one really sweet-looking, small-built <i>sardarji</i> who always wears a red turban and lives somewhere close to where I stay in India. I saw him once, riding his cycle on a very busy intersection- I was returning home from a particularly terrible practical exam and like an obedient sister, did the tap-your-head-thrice-and-release-the-lock ritual! By some stroke of luck, I got an A in that exam! And just like that, he became my most favorite <i>juju-sardarji</i> uncle in the whole world! I see him very rarely, mind you, which only adds to the angel-like charm I feel for him. Over the years, there have been many such objects and people which have been delegated to a similar divine stature - a yellow UCB T-shirt I got as a gift (which I wore once during my entire board exams!), my mom (if I argued with her before leaving the house, my day went bad!), blue Scorpios (yes, those Mahindra SUV's in India), shooting stars (I've only seen one till now, but it was so awesome that I almost forgot to wish!) and many other things! Friday, the 13th and wishing on fallen eyelashes were too common for me- what is special about discarded hair, right!<br />
<br />
Before you dismiss me as a crazy fanatic, let me assure you that I do understand the science behind it - it is an extension of the placebo effect - a strong (even irrational) belief in something which causes the perception of a therapeutic reaction.The other aspect of it is that unlike a true scientific experiment, in such cases, one keeps record of only the hits and comfortably disregards the misses each time. But then again, who said I was trying to prove my theory using science? Trying to prove the juju is almost like dissing the juju in their face, and <b>you <i>never</i> diss the juju</b>!<br />
<br />
Where do all these crazy beliefs come from? Why is it that we follow logic and reasoning to describe almost all phenomena around us, but still reserve some space in our minds for these superstitions? The fact is that we cannot use rationale to explain everything. The fact is that no matter how practical we may be, we still want to witness miracles every day...<br />
<br />
<i>Maybe</i> my data will yield good results..<br />
<i>Maybe</i> the interviewer will like my personality, even though I may not have the best experience..<br />
<i>Maybe</i> there wasn't a camera at that last traffic light..<br />
<i>Maybe</i> he will finally stop pretending that he doesn't care..<br />
<br />
There is a very big divide between things we can and cannot control. Bad things do happen to good people. And sometimes, you can't help but want to be a little bad, but still not have to pay for it. And while the nice, grown-up thing to do is to learn to accept things we cannot change, it is never an easy thing to do! The kid in us wants to believe that maybe if we wish hard enough, we will get that toy. Sometimes we need that tiny push from within; sometimes we need to know that while all the odds may be against us, we still can hit the jackpot....if only we see that red <i>sardarji</i> on the cycle!<br />
<br />
<i>Find a penny, pick it up; and all day long, you'll have good luck! :)</i></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-47288386622337895132011-12-10T20:24:00.000-05:002011-12-10T20:24:46.940-05:00Band-Aid Covers the Bullet Hole..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><br />
Excerpts of dialogues between friends, and friends of friends, and friends of friends of friends...<br />
<br />
<br />
********************************************************<b> </b><br />
<br />
<b>[Guy talk]</b><br />
<br />
"Friends with benefits should be a legitimate option in India.. Look at us- we're 26 and still are not used to the cruel ways of love. <i>Yahan ke logon ko </i>heartbreak<i> ki aadat ho jaati hai</i> by the time they are in their twenties. That is the healthy way of living life..<br />
<br />
"Oh please, do you want to give girls more avenues to use the "let's just be friends" dialogue?! No ways! No friends, only benefits.."<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Girl talk]</b><br />
<br />
"I think sex is over-rated"<br />
<br />
"What? How can you say that?"<br />
<br />
"No, seriously. I think it's not as big a deal as people make of it"<br />
<br />
"I'm sure it's not but you haven't even done it yet- so you never know!"<br />
<br />
"Exactly! I haven't even done it yet but I still know I'm going to get bored of it in a few months.."<br />
<br />
Turning to friend's fiance : "I feel sorry for you man, really sorry!"<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Mush]</b><br />
<br />
"I think love is like friendship with two shots of espresso topped with two scoops of chocolate syrup!" <br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[When Harry met Sally..] </b><br />
<br />
"I think we should just be friends for now.."<br />
<br />
"Isn't that supposed to be a girls-only dialogue? You cannot infiltrate our territory like that!"<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Ex-files]</b><br />
<br />
"My ex-boyfriend just sent me his wedding invitation card."<br />
<br />
"Oh? Sooo...you're going?"<br />
<br />
"Going? Seriously?! What do you want me to do - go on stage, congratulate him and his wife, shake his hand, pose for an awkward, corny picture with them, and act all dignified while the whole time I am imagining myself dunking him in sulfuric acid?! NO! I'm not going !!"<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[How to Scare Your Mother] </b><br />
<br />
"Do you know there's a vaccine for cervical cancer now? I was speaking to Dr. Bhidaye and he said you are a good candidate for the vaccine. You should take it when you come to India."<br />
<br />
"Why am I a good candidate?"<br />
<br />
"Coz the vaccine is most effective if you take it when you are unmarried.."<br />
<br />
"Unmarried? You mean if you are a virgin right?"<br />
<br />
"Huh?!"<br />
<br />
"I'm sure marriage has nothing to do with it. I guess you have to be a virgin to be able to take it?"<br />
<br />
"Usually, the assumption is that the two are inter-dependent... But the world is changing, so..."<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Arranged Marriage 101] </b><br />
<br />
"Dude, however cool he may be, the fact is that no Indian guy is going to marry an Indian girl who voluntarily has a tattoo!"<br />
<br />
"Are you trying to scare me?"<br />
<br />
"No, but I'm just telling you to be prepared.. You signed on for a very difficult life.."<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Good girls finish last]</b> <br />
<br />
"You are too nice"<br />
<br />
"Awww... Thanks ya, that's sweet.."<br />
<br />
"No, no. Listen to me- you're too nice"<br />
<br />
"And....that's not good?"<br />
<br />
"No - guys don't like nice girls! You need to grow some horns!"<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[True Story]</b><br />
<br />
"I know this may seem like a rip-off from the Jerry Maguire dialogue but the fact is that you had me at '<i>Tujhe dekha toh yeh jaana sanam..</i>' Seriously.."<br />
<br />
********************************************************<br />
<br />
<b>[Teen-ache]</b><br />
<br />
"Yaar, I am in trouble. I try to be mad at him, I want to be mad at him. I get mad at him too- like really, really, really mad- the maddest I can be! But it all goes away when his stupid, smiley face flashes on my cellphone when he calls.."<br />
<br />
"You need a new face; or honestly, you need a new life.. Join a dance class or something!"<br />
</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-7636786329636971142011-12-09T07:33:00.002-05:002011-12-09T07:35:54.726-05:004 AM Miracle - Not !! :P<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><b>2:42 AM</b> : Wake up - realize I slept off in the middle of a movie again, with the lights on and my visa documents sprawled across the bed under me - Dammit - <i>not again</i>!<br />
<br />
<b>2:44 AM</b> : Tinge of guilt - people like me are responsible for the coal reserves depleting.. <i>Ufff...</i><br />
<br />
<b>2:45 AM</b> : Might as well check on the visa dates while I'm awake<br />
<br />
<b>2:47 AM</b> : Yayyy !!! Showing 16th - finally! Let's do this..<br />
<br />
<b>2:50 AM</b> : Fill out details and hit Next - wait, where did Mumbai go?! Mumbai is not showing in the list of VFS centers !! <i>Where did it go?!</i><br />
<br />
<b>2:51 AM</b> : Re-enter info and now Mumbai showing but only 20th Dec available - what about the earlier dates!? - <i>Kya ho raha hai yaar !!</i><br />
<br />
<b>2:55 AM</b> : I should call the VFS people..<br />
<br />
<b>3:00 AM </b>: On line with Mrs. Chattopadhyay on the VFS Hotline - <i>No, I don't know if her name is Mrs. Chattopadhyay, but she sounds Bonglo-bhashi.. :P Oh what the hell.. I like giving nicknames to people.. You know Eddy right- No? That's my name for Edward Cullen - I think Eddy suits him better than Edward in any case.. :P</i><br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 1]</b><br />
<br />
Whenever I am speaking to like a customer care person in India, I never know whether to converse in Hindi or English.. I mean, there is a moment when the person says "<i>Hello?</i>" and I am actually thinking - do I reply with a "<i>Hello</i>" in the English-English accent or the Hindi-English accent?! I know they know English, but it's this weird mentality that speaking Hindi might develop a feeling of comradeship with me and hence, maybe help me get my work done sooner! Weird, huh!<br />
<br />
<b>3:01 AM</b> : I say "<i>Hello!</i>" with the Hindi-English accent finally.. Mrs. Chattopadhyay answers my questions, but that does not help a lot! Check VFS dates in front of her and now they show 15th open too- but no 16th and 19th! How did that happen?!<br />
<br />
<b>3:07 AM</b> : Hang up the phone. Maybe I should write something.. Stare at blank screen for 10 minutes..<br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 2]</b><br />
<br />
I wish I could concoct up random stories in the middle of the night- get inspiration from the rustling trees and the gushing winds and eerie moonlight and the soulful silences and allow my thoughts to flow miraculously through space and time and then, there's one magical moment where everything comes together and a story is born.. - 4 AM miracle or whatever - but nope, doesn't seem to be happening with me..<br />
<br />
<b>3:22 AM</b> : Call up mom instead.. Crib about the stupid online system and how I should have chosen to go to Delhi instead !<br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 3]</b><br />
<br />
I want to visit Delhi man - and hopefully see uncle-jis in monkey caps at weddings! :P<b> </b><br />
<br />
<b>3:32 AM</b> : Check VFS - Now showing 15th, 19th and 20th, but no 16th - <i>Seriously!</i><b> </b><br />
<br />
<b>3:35 AM</b> : Stare at screen again - Okay, I'm going to give this a shot - the night is beautiful and I should write..<i> </i><br />
<br />
<i>So a guy in a train - mid 30's, hot (of course!), staring out of the window, looks like the type of person who knows his destination but just for today, does not want to do the expected.. Towns swooshing by - Mellow Valley, Hicksville, Cripple Creek.. Train pulls into Reddick finally and slows down - guy contemplates getting down at the station..</i><br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 4]</b><br />
<br />
I love the phrase "Delicious Ambiguity" - read it somewhere.. But has such a nice feel to it.. I should use that in my writing sometime..<br />
<br />
<b>3:45 AM</b> : Nope, no thoughts after Reddick.. In any case, this is not a screenplay- I'm getting lost in the details! Forget it, this is not the night..<br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 5]</b><br />
<br />
Remembered a conversation from a day ago where a friend told me that I was a serious person - <i>Seriously?!</i> I just called Edward, Eddy, - how can I be serious?! Just because I write about <i>tanhayee</i> and life and dreams and love and loss? That is the deep side of me, but I am fun-loving and random and crazy too..<br />
<br />
<b>3:52 AM</b> : Need to be at work in 4 hours - going to be a long day - hopefully the bogie workload should level itself out with constant production, but does that make sense if we are storing sets instead? Do I need to add girder manpower to this? Should find out tomorrow..<br />
<br />
<b>3:56 AM</b> : Christmas presents! I haven't bought those yet !! So much work to do in five days..<br />
<br />
<b>3:55 AM</b> : Hungry, <i>yaar</i>! Feel like white choc mocha.. :(<br />
<br />
<b>3:56 AM</b> : Dudeee, sleep !!<br />
<br />
<b>3:57 AM</b> : Last try with VFS- anyway the center will close now, so no point trying until tomorrow!<br />
<br />
<b>3:58 AM</b> : Nope, no 16th yet! Forget it, worst case- I'll take an appointment for the 22nd, after Gau's shaadi..<br />
<br />
<b>4:00 AM</b> : Do I even post this crap I've been typing? Contemplate for a minute..<br />
<br />
<b>4:01 AM</b> : Oh, what the hell - this could be my 4 AM non-miracle.. At least it shows I'm not serious all the time..<br />
<br />
<b>[Random Thought 5.1]</b><br />
<br />
<i>I am not a serious person! :P</i><br />
<br />
<b>4:07 AM</b> : Edit and format - (<i>I like my articles! :P</i>) - and post!<br />
<br />
<b>4:10 AM</b> : Laptop shut down, gudnite!</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-33093660138799249042011-12-04T19:42:00.000-05:002011-12-04T19:42:11.077-05:00Main aur meri tanhayee, aksar yeh baatein kartein hain..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">It's the same scene again- the green shrubs lined in a single file for miles on end- each row had a signboard with a name on it - Barbera, Chenin Blanc, Merlot, Muscadet... Almost looked like an assembly line in school. There was that little wooden house in the middle of all that lushness - propped up on stilts with a tiny ladder to reach the doorway. The house looked like it could be blown away by a strong gust of wind, but its appearance defied its strength.. And there she was, standing at the door of the house holding one of those cowbells in her hand- she had just bought it from the gift shop as a souvenir. She was a memories-person and this trip was definitely memory-worthy.. She looked happy, really happy. Maybe it was the wine.. She posed for a picture and then reached her hand out to him to get down. And....<br />
<br />
Her eyes opened. This was where it always ended. She knew what happened next- it had been real, after all. But it was as if someone had snipped off the tape from this point on in her mind and so she could never replay the next scenes again.. What was worse was that she was wide awake now. She checked the time on her cellphone- 4:15 AM- oh crap, looks like even dreams follow clockwork.. Why does it always have to be two hours before her alarm rang?! She had to go back to sleep- this routine was starting to frustrate her now..<br />
<br />
She closed her eyes shut and tried to clear her mind- pictured all thoughts floating away into nothingness- a very ethereal image- but nope, no sleep. She tried imagining a curtain of the blackest black ever. Didn't work. Counting stars and sheep had never been useful in any case. Finally she gave up trying- just kept her eyes shut in the hope that fatigue will take over at some point. It was at this point that she heard his voice -<br />
<br />
"Ten nights in a row and you still haven't learned eh.. Same story all the time.", he said<br />
"Why are you here, yet again?! I thought I had made it clear that I don't want you in my life anymore.", she replied, opening her eyes finally. She knew now, that sleep was not going to return.<br />
"If only it worked that way, my dear. You forgot to teach me obedience when I was little. So now, I come and go as I please. You should know that..", he replied wryly. His voice was careless, dry, pompous to an extent- he knew he was in control.<br />
"Okay, have it your way then. I'm awake. What do you want?", she asked, resigning to him finally.<br />
"That has never been the question. You know I wouldn't come if you didn't want me to. So, the real question is- <i>what do you want</i>?!"<br />
"For the hundredth time- If I knew, I'd do something about it, right. I seriously don't know !!"<br />
"Think about it, Aaliya. Really think.. I'll give you some time while I take a short nap.."<br />
"Seriously?! <i>Seriously?!</i> You want me to think while you nap? Dude, I work ten to eleven hours everyday, and am dead tired and still I get no more than five hours of sleep every night because you come and disturb me at the break of dawn; and you want me to sit and think <i>while you nap</i>?! I would punch you so hard if you were real...". She was angry now, really angry.<br />
"Ahhh stop yelling, woman! It's such a beautiful night. Are you thinking of the past again?"<br />
"No! I'm not. And that is the problem- the past is such a blur- I cannot remember anything even if I want to. Where did all those memories go?"<br />
"Ahhh.. Well, blurs can be artistic. Or alcoholic too, actually. Did you drink too much? Maybe that explains the vineyards...". He was mocking her, and was not even ashamed of it.<br />
"No, I don't drink that much and you know it. And yes, I remember the vineyards, but even that is a half-baked memory. The rest of it has just dissipated mysteriously. There are scenes and snippets here and there- tiny 20 second clips. A few months ago, these were a full-blown movie."<br />
"But that is a good thing, right. That movie made you sad every time you saw it. It's going away. That is what is supposed to happen. Why do you want to hold on?"<br />
"I don't. I don't want to hold on. But at the same time, I did not expect them to just go away. Those memories, those people were a part of the fabric of my life at one point. How can they just not be there all of a sudden?"<br />
"The people haven't stayed, so why do you expect the memories to?"<br />
"No, it's not that. I knew they would go away after a while. It's just that I always thought that reminiscing about those days would at least evoke some emotion in me- sadness, remorse, disappointment- something. But now?! It's just nothingness- isn't that weird? It's almost as if moving on was so easy.."<br />
"Okay, now it's my turn to say it- seriously !! I've been listening to you whine about wanting to let go for nearly a year now. You moved across the country because you thought that would make you move on.. And now that it has happened, you say it was too easy?! I think in some perverted way, you like the sadness.."<br />
"Maybe we do- human nature. I think being dark and twisty feels more natural than bright and shiny. It's comfortable. It helps you justify eating the whole tub of ice-cream or laying in bed watching soppy movies the whole day. There are too many expectations from optimistic people! It's way too much pressure.."<br />
"And the Gods wonder why the human civilization is doomed! You act like you have all these lives to live and your bones cannot take the burden anymore... Wake up and smell the coffee !!"<br />
"Look- I know the speech- I am young, I have a brilliant job, I am financially independent, I have friends in my life, and interests that keep me happy.. On the face of it, there is nothing to complain about. I know I'm supposed to be happy.. But still, the picture is not complete..."<br />
"The picture, again! My artist friend, the picture is not complete because you have decided that it is not. You draw your own painting, you decide its boundaries, you decide what you want in it, you decide the colors, you decide the theme.. It's <i>you</i>, not anyone else. Ever remember the importance of white space in your art class? Too many things at one time and what you get is a mess- nothing stands out, or everything stands out. Besides, life is not one picture, it is an exhibition of all your creations- however shoddy they may be. And even an exhibition takes time to build- you do it one frame at a time.You cannot do it all, and you cannot have it all."<br />
"Easier said than done.. It's like I'm driving on a freeway at a speed of eighty-five miles per hour without a GPS- and you know how terrible my sense of direction is! What if I missed my exit? What if I missed on the wonderful experiences that could have been mine, had I just slowed down or just looked at a map beforehand?"<br />
"Fine- then take a damn exit, just for the sake of it- but before you do, be forewarned that the interesting story you are looking for might just turn out to be an interminable nightmare - are you ready for that? And enough with the metaphors, already! You're confusing me, now!"<br />
"All I'm saying is- how do I know that I'm choosing the right path.. It's just frustrating thinking about all that could have been..."<br />
"I hate to break it to you, Aaliya, but if you wanted life to be simple, then you should have signed under the "Bugs" column when God was filling out the Choices form. And even they don't have it easy nowadays.."<br />
"...and wait, people- they're complicated! They love to hurt you. One day, they are your best friends, they make you part of their life, they love you and care for you and make you get used to them. And the next minute, you're out- replaced by work or other friends or lovers.. Whatever happened to commitment?"<br />
"You need to breathe... And stop analyzing. What could have been- no such thing. If it didn't happen, then it could never have been. And couldn't have been because it wasn't good for you. And people- for every person who left, there are two who stayed and unfortunately, you only know to focus on the wrong ones.."<br />
"So, what do I do? Be thankful for the life I have, learn to count my blessings, think about the journey and not the destination, appreciate the stars and the roses along the way...?!"<br />
"Nothing- you just try to sleep- five hours a day is not enough.. When you wake up, it is another day. It may not be a new start, but at least it would be a new opportunity to make things right again.."<br />
"I should sleep.. These thoughts, they just don't go away.. But I should sleep.. Are you going to come back again tomorrow?". There was anticipation in her voice- but whether good or bad, no one could tell.<br />
He smiled and said, "Only if you want me to, Aaliya. I'll come only if you want me to, remember?"</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-77169307855193093482011-11-24T20:52:00.001-05:002011-11-24T20:53:06.129-05:00Breaking Dawn<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><i>Disclaimer: NO, this post has nothing to do with the Twilight movie- I saw it with my friends to make them happy and I think it is the most ridiculous movies of all time- two hours of unadulterated torture!</i><br />
<br />
Real post begins now ----><br />
<br />
Time: 5:50 AM- Day 1 of Thanksgiving Break<br />
You think it's ridiculous to be awake at this unearthly hour, especially when it's a break- yes, I do too. But this is one in a series of awkward nights I have been having since the past week..<br />
Tonight I got up with multiple dreams- one about some material deliveries being screwed up on the production floor at work, one about saying good-bye to a friend who was leaving Davis for good and one about Thanksgiving two years ago amidst snow and Fall-colored maple leaves!<br />
I left the light in my room on again - goodness, I'm dreading my PG&E bill this month!<br />
I spent $300 on this IKEA bed - why can't I sleep !!<br />
<br />
Anyway, no work today, so I get up, make myself a cup of white choc mocha and open my laptop.. Email checked, Facebook checked, blog updates by friends checked, NPR news checked.. Apparently, Sharad Pawar was slapped today by a Sikh guy today at some function in Delhi- it's all over the news and Facebook and the guy is being applauded by one and all. Agreed that someone like Mr. Pawar completely deserves being treated like this- he is one of the most corrupt officials the Indian government has ever seen. But is slapping him in public going to make him control the rising prices of agricultural produce in India? No. Is he going to feel guilty and confess all his crimes to the police? Definitely not. Harvinder Singh vented out his frustration, but the result of that is a Maharashtra bandh tomorrow- go figure! It, infact, takes all the attention away from the real issues that need to be tackled and gives these politicians reason to make a mountain out of a molehill..<br />
<br />
Talking of mountains, this <a href="http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=YR12Z8f1Dh8" target="_blank">Kolaveri Di </a>song is turning out to be quite a rage in the country- I'm amazed by the amount of jokes and caricatures that people have come up with already. To be honest, it is quite an addictive song- I can totally imagine it being a hit on drunken night-outs with college friends. The Indian audience is so unpredictable- on one day, the top favorite is a song with lyrics as beautiful as- "<i>jo bhi main, kehna chahoon, barbaad kare alfaaz mere</i>" and the next week, "<i>white-u skin girl-u girl-u, girl-u heart-u black-u</i>" is rocking the charts.. Click <a href="http://schrodingersbekku.blogspot.com/2011/11/everything-you-wanted-to-know-about.html" target="_blank">this link</a> for a hilarious Kolaveri 101 run-down.. While we're on music, I have to say- I absolutely love Mohit Chauhan- I think he has the most soulful and romantic voices I've ever heard!<br />
<br />
It's weird how our work influences all other aspects of our life too. I remember, when I was doing an internship with Price Chopper (it's a grocery store in upstate NY, like a fancier Walmart), I always called fruits and vegetables "produce" because that's how they were classified in the warehouse. I'm a scheduler now and I just realized that every time anyone says one week, I instantly think 5 days because that's what we use in our day-to-day calculations.. It's not a bad thing, of course.. I love the fact that some part of my brain is always thinking about projects at work and how to handle them etc.<br />
<br />
The seasons are changing here so fast! There was hardly a Fall and it's Winter already. It is lightly raining outside and there are leaves all over the road- in shades of green, red and yellow- they look so beautiful! I love the holidays and the festivities associated with them- there are times when I don't like them as much, but I still love them for the most part. Diwali, Christmas and Thanksgiving are my favorites and I cannot even choose which one I like better! Festivals to me are about lights, gifts, good food, friends and family, traditions and togetherness.<br />
<br />
I remember, last year, this time, I was in RIT preparing for my thesis defense! Time really flies! Yesterday, two of my friends "celebrated" their pre-wedding anniversary which means that they are getting married on this day, next year! On that note, two of my best friends would be married by this time <i>next month</i>! Time is flying at the speed of light !! What would I be doing this time next year?!<br />
<br />
<a href="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-G6fnNukx7kY/Ts7ui6QROCI/AAAAAAAAJeo/0a2O23-Z-2M/s1600/318693_204685142939381_126215364119693_463903_511449871_n.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="228" src="http://3.bp.blogspot.com/-G6fnNukx7kY/Ts7ui6QROCI/AAAAAAAAJeo/0a2O23-Z-2M/s320/318693_204685142939381_126215364119693_463903_511449871_n.jpg" width="320" /></a>I saw this image one day and it really formed an impression on my mind. I think I think too much! :P I should stop thinking and start doing. These intermittent sleepless nights have forced me to really outline the things I am doing wrong in life and what I need to change. I think I have come up with a few contenders and have taken up two projects which I hope will help me better the current situation. Let's see how they go..<br />
<br />
Okay, so I know I just said I'm not going to think too much anymore- but one last thought- I was talking to a friend about loneliness the other day- this girl has the most amazing lifestyle ever- a great job that she loves, a very active social life, the opportunity to pursue her passions, friends, interests that keep her motivated, financial stability- nothing terribly wrong on the face of it- and still she told me that she leads a very lonely life. Is it possible to have people around you who care about you and still feel lonely? If loneliness is a state of mind, then it probably never goes away, regardless of where you are. People compare their lives in India and the US and say that the lifestyle in the US is very lonely. But if you're staying away from your family in India, isn't that the same as living 3000 miles away, at least on a day-to-day basis? Yes, you'd be in the same time and geographical zone which does make communication a lot easier, but maybe it would still be a lonely existence...<br />
<br />
Ohh I just realized today is Thanksgiving- maybe I should sign-off with a few things I am thankful for, in the spirit of the season..<br />
<br />
For one, I am thankful for the people in my life currently- believe me, I know what being lonely is, and it is not fun. And I have come a long way from that. So yes, as I always say, people matter and I am thankful for the ones in my life.<br />
I am thankful for great bosses- no, my boss doesn't know I blog, but again, I have had my share of bad bosses and so I am genuinely thankful for being blessed with a brilliant one this time around!<br />
I am thankful for change, when it is needed. And I am thankful for things staying the same when we seek comfort in the familiar.<br />
And I am thankful for Mohit Chauhan.. :):)<br />
<br />
Happy Thanksgiving everyone! :)</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-80394233024521334742011-11-24T11:54:00.000-05:002011-11-24T11:54:18.771-05:00Growing up...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Like all mothers of the world, my mom has always been extremely protective about me, maybe a touch more than most moms actually.. Of course, when I was a teenager, I called it being over-bearing and interfering but growing up makes you realize that it was actually just her motherly need to shield me from all the bad things in the world. I do the same with my sister sometimes- she is only 4 years younger to me but every now and then, I feel the need to warn her about the dangers in the world. I even use the same dialogue my mom used on me- <i>"learn from me, don't repeat the mistakes I made!"</i> My retort to that always was the classic- "<i>let me do what I want; let me make my own mistakes; how will I grow if I don't learn things the hard way?!</i>" Very easy to say- sounds all brave and fearless, but is not so easy to follow, or so I have learned over time! My sister is a lot more mature than me though- she did actually manage to learn from my mistakes and made sure she did not repeat a lot of the ones I made, even though tempted otherwise. See, this is why you should always be the younger one! :P<br />
<br />
Anyway, I digress.. So one of the things my mom never liked was how easily I trusted people. I don't mean strangers on the bus or anything, but more like how I could do anything for my friends and people I was close to. She did not like me having sleepovers with my friends or hanging out with them till late at night- 10 PM was my curfew time. She did not like it when I spoke to them on the phone for too long because she wanted me to study instead! She also did not like it when I gave up study-time or family-time to help them out or be with them sometimes. Her point in all this was that I go overboard and out of my way to help a friend and she wanted me to hold back on that because not all people reciprocate with the same intensity, which only ends up hurting me.. This impending hurt is what she wanted to save me from.. The fact that a lot of the stupid astrologers she consulted in those years told her the same thing about my over-trusting nature only made matters worse... :P<br />
<br />
I was thinking about friendships the other day and the people who have been a part of my life ever since I really knew what it means to have a meaningful connection with a person. I often feel like God or whoever the guiding force is in this universe, is running a giant lab experiment with people in the world. Just like those redox reactions we learned about in school chemistry. We each form different kinds of bonds with different people depending on our so-called "electron configurations".. Each reaction can either increase or decrease our oxidation number but stability is reached only when a minimum energy bond is formed. Can we determine if that will happen with an X person, though? Not really.. Situations change, people change, we change, chemistries change; some people get lucky, others not so much; some people move on, others remain where they were.. In a situation that is so transient, how do we determine what is too soon and too close? And since we are always searching for reasons and answers, how do we justify the people who did come into our lives but left halfway? If they weren't planning on staying for the journey, then why did they make us change our destination?<br />
<br />
Given all the above points, was my mom right?<br />
Have I made a fool of myself by trusting the wrong people at times? Maybe.<br />
Have I learned anything from those mistakes? The hope is that I have.<br />
Will I repeat the same mistakes again? Oh hell, ya! :P<br />
So, what do I do? She isn't here to save me from the hurt each time...<br />
I guess I go back to what I told her ten years ago - <i>"let me do what I want; let me make my own mistakes; how will I grow if I don't learn things the hard way"</i><br />
<br />
I guess I'm not a big fan of growing up..... <i><br />
</i></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-51545793986836915112011-11-04T18:24:00.002-04:002011-11-04T18:28:03.329-04:00<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Thank you AOL / ICQ for coming up with instant messenger services in the 1900's and then Google for integrating it with their email service !!! <br />
<br />
I officially love gtalk - because it can connect people who are <a href="http://www.timeanddate.com/worldclock/distanceresult.html?p1=217&p2=106">7374 miles</a> apart and have not spoken to each other for over 13 days and who <em><strong>need</strong></em> to speak to each other !!! :):)<br />
<br />
Stupid post, but this has been a crazy week and I'm happy it's ending and I'm grateful for a few special people in my life... :) And gtalk just helped me reconnect with them.. :)</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-89167385242744594892011-11-03T02:58:00.001-04:002011-11-03T03:00:43.891-04:00New beginnings, old endings..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">People tend to get really romantic about the beginning of new things- may be a new job, a new relationship, a new life, new people- whatever the case may be- starting with a clean slate seems to have some kind of charm to it. You think of how things would be different this time. You make lists of all the things you would work towards changing in yourself. A world of possibilities lay in front of you and you would work towards grabbing them with open arms and make the most of it - your life would change forever!<br />
<br />
Reality check though- no matter how new life and the circumstances may be, <i>you are still the same you</i>- after a point, how much can you change yourself? Yes, you start with renewed enthusiasm and motivation, which is great! But very soon, the energy fades away and you tend to revert back to your old ways. Your faults still remain the same, your fears still remain the same, your goof-ups still remain the same. They only get temporarily subdued by the magic of a new beginning..<br />
<br />
Like for example, suppose you are an inherently positive person who has a terrible accident and becomes a paraplegic- this may set you back initially, you will hate your life and curse your destiny. But once the emotions settle, the optimism and energy to take life by its horns and fight back does return because that's who you are. On the other hand, what if you are an inherently negative person and win a million dollar lottery? You would be ecstatic initially, love your life and thank your stars but once the wave of happiness subsides, you go back to complaining about the corruption, traffic, pollution and your neighbor's dog! The inner you really never changes.. Right?<br />
<br />
We humans are funny- we keep repeating the same mistakes over and over again and never really learn to change. And then we wonder why life didn't turn out any differently !! The unfortunate truth of the matter is- we are always given the right opportunities, but we never learn how to use them correctly.. Because screwing up something that is perfect is what comes naturally to us..</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-54703880493151930812011-10-29T20:42:00.001-04:002011-10-29T20:47:03.042-04:00I...<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">...want to feel pure adrenaline!<br />
...want to jump off a plane at 15,000 feet and experience free falling to the earth!<br />
...want to see a shooting star!<br />
...want to really, really, really laugh!<br />
...want to really, really, really cry!<br />
...want to tell someone my crazy life ambitions!<br />
...want to fulfill one of my crazy life ambitions!<br />
..want to find something that I love so much, it even keeps me awake at night! Somehow Anu's words have never stop ringing in my mind for seven years now!<br />
...want to go back to kick-boxing!<br />
...want to take a wrong turn somewhere and discover a completely new, untouched, pristine land!<br />
...want to get back my 4 AM friend!<br />
...want to stop putting on a brave and smiley face all the time! I remember this famous line in a musical- flowers wilt, apples rot, thieves get rich and saints get shot and God don't answer all our prayers a lot.. :P Hell, that's true and I know life goes on, but that doesn't mean I cannot sulk about it! :P<br />
...want to use a lot of swear words.. :P I know that's not me, but I still want to do it.. :P<br />
...want life to imitate a Hindi film!<br />
...want to believe that keeping the faith works..<br />
..want to learn how to live alone- 3 years with roommates and I've seriously forgotten how to enjoy my own company!<br />
...want to read a book in one entire sitting!<br />
...want to live a day without a cellphone!<br />
...want to break eggs or throw oranges or yell real loud or punch someone real hard!<br />
...want to go to London!<br />
...want to feel the goosebumps on my skin just before a performance on stage! It's been over a year!<br />
...want to lie down under the sky and watch the stars (maybe I'll do that tonight.. :))<br />
...want to work on a lathe or milling machine! <br />
...want to go into a bubble- nothing else exists!<br />
...want to feel total control!<br />
...want to work super-hard!<br />
...want to see a miracle happen!<br />
...want to eat fondue!<br />
...want to land up at the airport and take a flight to a random place!<br />
...want someone to believe in me!<br />
...want a pet cat!<br />
...want to make plans!<br />
...want to feel inspired!<br />
...<br />
...<br />
...<br />
...</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-62655985393046906272011-10-20T21:40:00.004-04:002011-12-04T19:46:53.534-05:00The Bench<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TtX99MUBYcg/TqDMqVAAGKI/AAAAAAAAJWk/YrYePIsSxkM/s1600/the-bench-landscape_19-106697.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="149" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-TtX99MUBYcg/TqDMqVAAGKI/AAAAAAAAJWk/YrYePIsSxkM/s200/the-bench-landscape_19-106697.jpg" width="200" /></a></div>Blame fiction writers and film-makers for romanticizing gardens so much. He who plants a garden, plants happiness, they say. Great love is born here, even greater loves end here. Legend has it that Newton was sitting in a garden when he was hit by that famed apple and the story of gravity was born. No one even considers the fact the Newton was working on the theory of terrestrial gravity for nearly two decades- what is important is that it all came together during that afternoon walk in the garden full of apple trees. The Book of Genesis credits the Garden of Eden as the place where the whole of the human race initiated. People build gardens as dedications for their loved ones. You know my favorite garden scene in a movie? It's one of those last scenes in (500) days of Summer, where Summer meets Tom for the first time after she gets married. That dialogue still rings in my head - <i>"You weren't wrong, Tom. You were just wrong about me."</i><br />
<br />
Me? Oh, I'm a bench- the tiny, inconsequential element that no garden is complete without and yet, is always forgotten. There are no love ballads written about me. No bench is ever used as a metaphor for life, love and happiness. I'm sure there were no benches in the Garden of Eden, but let's go back to the Newton story- what if Issac was sitting under another bench and the apple had never fallen on his head? He still would have figured out the laws of Nature, of course, only maybe a decade later.<br />
<br />
Don't get me wrong, I'm usually not the jealous, attention-seeking type. I agree that I per se, have no aesthetic appeal whatsoever. People come to the garden for the trees and the flowers and butterflies and ponds and the like- I am only a functional element placed for the sake of convenience, a mere prop. There isn't a lot you can do with me too- I come in two types, wood and metal. There could be a simple or more ornate version of me- but that's about it. But would people spend as much time in a garden if there were no bench? Probably not. Most of them don't like to get their clothes dirty, so they wouldn't sit on the grass, although I agree that is more romantic than a bench. I am the one who hears all the stories, sees the love and the pain and the fear and the passion. I feel for these people. I know these people......<br />
<br />
<i>"I'm sorry, Aaliya.", he said.</i><br />
<i>"This is all I wanted. For seven years. All I wanted was a heartfelt sorry. So, I should say thank-you I guess", she replied, pensive look in her eyes.</i><br />
<i>"I guess I was a kid back then. Naive and stupid. I should have stayed."</i><br />
<i>"You shouldn't have stayed, you should have fought. There is a difference. And you should have been honest with me. I deserved that much."</i><br />
<i>"I know. But why didn't you fight longer then, Al. You knew how messed up my mind was then."</i><br />
<i>"You think we would have lasted any longer? A year more, maybe. But a lifetime? Nahh.. We are structured very differently, Nits. You need a punching bag and a Gibraltar. Someone who'll be there when you think the whole world is against you. But you don't know how to be that for someone else."</i><br />
<i>"That's not true."</i><br />
<i>"It is. And you know it. Anyway, that is not of any consequence anymore. We have both moved on far bigger and better places. This day is just an ending our story should have gotten years ago."</i><br />
<i>"Are you happy?"</i><br />
<i>"Yes. More than I can ever imagine. Whatever happened, did happen for the best."</i><br />
<i>"I know. And I'm happy for us"</i><br />
<i>"Bye, Nits. Have a good life."</i><br />
<i>"Bye, Aaliya. I'm sorry again."</i><br />
<br />
She smiles. They get up and leave. They were my favorite couple. And I remember feeling the pangs of helplessness when they ended things right at this spot seven years ago, almost to the day. That was the day I wished I had arms that could move. So that I could give one thwack to Nits and ask him to stay. So that I could give a bear hug to Aaliya when he left.<br />
<br />
I am only a bench- ornate and metal, painted black. I have no wordly wisdom and no greater purpose. But there's one quote from Shantaram that sums up life as I know it. <br />
<br />
<i>"Sometimes we love with nothing more than hope. Sometimes we cry with everything except tears. In the end that's all there is. Love & its duty, sorrow & its truth. In the end that's all we have - to hold on tight until the dawn" </i><br />
<br />
Shantaram was her favorite book. Aaliya always read this out to Nits. Unfortunately, he never really got it.</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-69717875780249476042011-10-07T16:30:00.000-04:002011-10-07T16:30:22.476-04:00Can't Fight Time..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div style="text-align: left;">दिलों में तुम अपनी बेताबियाँ लेके चल रहे हो तो जिंदा हो तुम </div><div style="text-align: left;">नज़र में ख्वाबों की बिजलियाँ लेके चल रहे हो तो जिंदा हो तुम </div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">बेताबी is good- it just means that you stand to lose something. It means that something is important enough that its absence <em>affects</em> you in some way. Having said that, I think as you grow older, you also realize that patience is seriously a virtue- there is a right place and a right time for things to happen and sometimes, you need to just trust that the process will fall in place when it has to. Unfortunately, I think I can be a real kid when it comes to this- I have always hated the dark. I like to <em>know</em> where things stand. In terms of my own life, I like to map out my career and life goals- at least make a tentative plan of action for how things should be. In terms of others, my actions more than compensate for my lack in being articulate about my thoughts and feelings. If I trust you and like you and make you a part of my inner circle, then you will know it through my actions- simple and straightforward. I hate those devious games people play in order to control someone’s mind and feelings. And I hate people who can never take a stand- especially when their decisions are interlinked to someone else. I guess it is this love for clarity and organization that helps me like my job as a project scheduler. But being in scheduling also teaches you that almost nothing is ever supposed to go as per plan.. :P The ultimate purpose of curveballs is to show up when you least expect them so that you can invest time and energy in figuring out how to dodge them. Things can never be as clear as black and white. Goals need time to pan out, people need time to take decisions- and the smart person knows how to accept that as a fact.<br />
<br />
The bigger the investment, the better the returns. The little caveat in this philosophy, though, is- how does one know what is worth giving that time to? Scientists invest years in a particular project hoping against hope that their time and effort will not go in vain. People devote half their lifetimes to a relationship because they want it last till eternity. Till death do us part and all that.. But some times, things just don’t work out. People break up. Experiments fail. But the circle of life dictates that you take these setbacks in your stride, pick up the pieces and restart all over again. This is fine too- some times a clean slate is all you need. But starting from the bottom of the ladder also means that you need a lot more patience and perseverance to climb to where you were before and go beyond that. And god forbid, you reach the open mouth of a snake again! This game can get really frustrating!<br />
<br />
The poem “If” by Rudyard Kipling is one of my all time favorites. There was a time I used to read this out to myself nearly every day. This is my favorite verse –<br />
<br />
<em>If you can dream - and not make dreams your master; <br />
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim; <br />
If you can meet with triumph and disaster <br />
And treat those two imposters just the same; <br />
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken <br />
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools, <br />
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken, <br />
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools..</em><br />
<br />
Life is full of so many layers- you figure out how to unravel one of them and before you know it, another has taken it’s place. I’m not complaining- the fun is in fitting together the pieces of this puzzle.. But sometimes, just on one of those days, you wish someone would just show you how the final picture is supposed to look like! :)<br />
<br />
<br />
P.S. 1. - Blogging in the middle of the work day?! - Not good! But it's Friday! :)<br />
P.S. 2. - Typing out that initial verse in Hindi was super-fun!</div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-11612881623956263372011-10-04T03:06:00.000-04:002011-10-04T03:06:22.383-04:00Raindrops on Roses and Whiskers on Kittens..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Hmmm so I've had enough of the philosophical posts.. One thing I've come to realize is that the mind is very complex- I think it likes to complicate even the simplest of equations.. And no matter how hard you try, the only way to untangle some knots is to just let them be- sometimes the answer just pops back at you after a while.. So, wanting to write something cheerful and simple.. I remember this game a friend and I used to play whenever any of us felt a little low.. We'd just close our eyes, clear our minds completely, set the timer to five minutes and then start listing out the things that make us feel happy- no thought, no deliberation and no logic.. She isn't with me right now, but I'm still going to play this game by myself..<br />
<br />
So here goes- cannot close my eyes and type but still...clearing my mind...setting the timer to five minutes.. Its 11:58 PM..<br />
<br />
My cat back home in Pune<br />
Long conversations with close friends<br />
When Monday morning meetings get canceled..<br />
Pehli baarish<br />
Purple<br />
Whatsapp messages that make you smile in the middle of a hard day<br />
When a new cooking experiment turns out really well<br />
New York City<br />
Fall colors in the east coast<br />
An idea or project that captivates you so much that it even keeps you awake at night<br />
Not having to always spell out every feeling<br />
Lighthouses<br />
Kesar pista kulfi<br />
Being on a creative high<br />
Love<br />
Setting up an apartment<br />
Old photographs<br />
Sunday morning coffee<br />
Planning surprises<br />
Getting surprises... :)<br />
Chats on the balcony<br />
Grey's Anatomy quotes that just fit the mood of the day<br />
Dance<br />
Being able to click a really good portrait<br />
Compliments<br />
Reading archived emails from days gone by<br />
Holding hands<br />
Refrigerator magnets<br />
Light snow that floats around like tiny wasps of cotton<br />
Uplifting music<br />
Random smiles<br />
That feeling in your gut that tells you something is right<br />
Waterfalls<br />
Vanilla milkshake<br />
Spanish <br />
<br />
Alrighty, time's up, mind is happy and it's time to sleep.. Shubh ratri everyone.. :)</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-18596695984689237512011-10-02T17:49:00.000-04:002011-10-02T17:49:08.450-04:00Stromboli<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><i><b>Disclaimer</b>: This post is named Stromboli because it's lunch time and I'm hungry and I am craving Stromboli.. This post is not even remotely related to food. This post is not about anything actually. I've just been having a very confused past few days and I'm trying to string my thoughts together because I've always been better at writing than speaking.. Having said that, my thoughts are so tangled right now that I don't think even writing them down point-wise is really going to help me- but it's my blog, so what the hell- I'm still going to give it a shot.. I apologize in advance for the random post- something more concrete in a few days- I promise.. :)</i><br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>[Thought 1]</b><br />
<br />
Have you ever felt like there is so much to do in life and so little time? Like not in terms of long-term, well-defined goals per se, but just things you want to do. I read blogs of random people at times, and some of them are very open about what their dreams are- some want to learn French, some want to reach the base camp of the Himalayas, some want to sky-dive or write a book or open a start-up venture.. I have such goals too, but it's just that I'm not very vocal about them. But one thing I've always wondered is- it's very easy, no let's rephrase that- it's <i>easier</i> to write or define things you want to accomplish at certain stages of your life. But very few actually follow them through and reach a stage where they can successfully strike them off their list. What distinguishes these people from the rest, who just make a list and store it in a keepsake box and then open it a few years down the line and lament about how time has flown by..? Is it mere talent? Nah, can't be that simple- Talent is useful in terms of achieving your full-blown life goals in your profession or family or social life. But in most cases, these goals take up so much of your time and energy that the other less-significant, personal, yet important items get sidetracked. I think most of it is about motivation- the will to practice and persist until you succeed. But then again, motivation can be internal or external- for some people, their inner fire is so strong that no amount of resistance can stop them. Others need people to push them. Like in the case of writing- as G correctly pointed out- it's easier to write when you have interesting people around you to talk with because a lot of these conversations actually generate ideas.. Again, with internal motivation- it stems from how the society around you has been- have you always been pushed to give everything a shot without fearing failure or have you always been asked to test the waters before jumping? In the case of external motivation, it's all about being at the right place at the right time.. I can go on about this, but the idea is that a full-blown FMEA can be done on what distinguishes the achievers from the regulars. But in all it's veracity (;)), it is also nearly impossible to develop a set model for these kind of habitual achievers. This whole concept scares me because of the uncertainty associated with it. How many items am I going to be able to cross off my list? What if the mundane concerns of day-to-day life completely take over these crazy ambitions?<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>[Thought 2]</b><br />
<br />
Choices. Since the time philosophy was invented, pseudo-smart and consciously verbose people have professed about how the choices we make define the path of our lives. The thing about choices is that sometimes the right thing to do can be very different from what you want to do. Like you have two paths to choose from- A and B. A is the path of least resistance- logical, safe, more than 40% chance of success, possibility of pleasing more than 60% people. Those are good odds. But A is just blah- it's not what you want from your life, it doesn't excite you, you know that a small part of your brain would probably regret it always. B on the other hand is how you have always wanted it to be- you know that if this works, then it's a jackpot- but there is no way of knowing if it will work or not. And sometimes, time is not on your side. What do you do? Still give B a shot? Or go with A and then try to convince yourself to find the excitement and inspiration in it? Maybe things take a turn and you realize eventually that A was the right thing to do after all. But it's a gamble.. Okay, I'm not battling with such dramatic issues in life, but every decision you take is a miniature version of this problem- A or B, safe or risky, normal or exciting? Stupid philosophers wasted time in writing those crappy quotes- <i>thoda time solution ko </i>define<i> karne mein </i>invest<i> karte toh</i> the world would be an easier place.. :P<br />
<b><br />
</b><br />
<b>[Thought 3]</b><br />
<br />
So I was thinking about the weirdest quotes from Hindi movies that I remember and somehow the following one from Maine Pyaar Kiya always is the first one to pop up- This was after Mohnish Behl sees Salman Khan and Bhagyashree in his party together- so imagine the scene- All three are drenched in rain (can't remember why it was raining, actually maybe they're just sweating..), Mohnish is angry- I think he was trying to <i>lootofy the izzat</i> of Bhagyashree and of course, Sallu bhai is the knight in shining armor.. So woman is crying in a corner, hero is wild with fury and villain is insulted but also glad to have proven a point.. The dialogue goes- "<i>Prem, ek ladka aur ladki kabhi dost nahi ban sakte. Yeh toh parda hai parda.. Kapkapati raaton mein dhadakte hue dilon ki tadapti hui aag ko bujhane ka...chupaane ka..</i><br />
<br />
Waah waah- <i>kya dialogue hai</i>! Don't ask me why I remember it so well though- I wish I knew! :P<br />
<br />
Another dialogue that is my all time favorite is from Kal Ho Na Ho- "<i>Hasna hai toh Rohit, rona hai toh Rohit, magar pyaar karna hai toh kisi aur se..</i> It's not going to work anymore, Naina.." Hmmm the plight of being stuck in the "friend" zone... :P<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 4]</b><br />
<br />
Have you ever met a person who has challenged you more than anyone ever has? So you meet them and get to know them and every time, there is a new facet to their personality that amazes you and frustrates you at the same time- you wish you could be like them, but you also know that you could never be like them.. I can't spell out the feeling correctly, but I hope you get the point.. I have always been very good at understanding people but characters like these are so difficult to sort out..<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 5]</b><br />
<br />
I really feel like doing something impulsive. It's been so long since I've just done something in the moment, just because I felt like it !! :( Maybe I should ask G to get that liquid nitrogen from his lab.. :P<br />
<br />
<b>[Thought 6]</b><br />
<br />
Sometimes I wish I could behave or act like a typical girl, just for a few hours- I don't know exactly what that means, but that's why it's a random thought.. :P<br />
<br />
<br />
I don't exactly feel sorted right now, but can I please have some Stromboli?</div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-11870013408047257922011-09-27T17:02:00.001-04:002011-12-04T19:47:20.137-05:00Children<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Random website-hopping brought me to this beautiful poem by Kahlil Gibran- On Children.<br />
<br />
If you have kids, this is one of those poems you should have framed by your bedside and read out loud every night, almost like a prayer.. I know that's one thing I would do for sure..<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;"><i>Your children are not your children.<br />
They are the sons and daughters of Life's longing for itself.<br />
They come through you but not from you,<br />
And though they are with you yet they belong not to you.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>You may give them your love but not your thoughts, <br />
For they have their own thoughts.<br />
You may house their bodies but not their souls,<br />
For their souls dwell in the house of tomorrow, <br />
which you cannot visit, not even in your dreams.<br />
You may strive to be like them, <br />
but seek not to make them like you.<br />
For life goes not backward nor tarries with yesterday.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: center;"><i>You are the bows from which your children<br />
as living arrows are sent forth.<br />
The archer sees the mark upon the path of the infinite, <br />
and He bends you with His might <br />
that His arrows may go swift and far.<br />
Let your bending in the archer's hand be for gladness;<br />
For even as He loves the arrow that flies, <br />
so He loves also the bow that is stable.</i></div><div style="text-align: center;"><br />
</div><div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;"><a href="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sb7qlkwT9vA/ToI5NjX_TdI/AAAAAAAAJVE/6Jkn2XCg7A0/s1600/children1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="240" kca="true" src="http://2.bp.blogspot.com/-sb7qlkwT9vA/ToI5NjX_TdI/AAAAAAAAJVE/6Jkn2XCg7A0/s320/children1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div><div style="text-align: left;"><br />
</div><div style="text-align: left;">Note to all parents: After a certain age, let your children <b>be</b> ! They are smart enough to figure their way out..</div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-59668876391469799022011-09-25T04:34:00.003-04:002011-12-04T19:46:29.906-05:00Fiction piece from the yesteryears..<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on"><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i><b>Time</b>: One of those unusual quiet Saturdays, 1:35 AM</i></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i><b>State of Mind</b>: Melancholic</i></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i><b>Song on iPod</b>: Tanha Dil Tanha Safar (maybe that explains the mood.. :P)</i><i> </i></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i>I am browsing through my hard disk and reading some of the articles I've written in the past so many years- most of them have found their way to this blog, but there are some things which I never got around to posting coz they were too amateurish or silly.. Opened this little fictional piece I wrote many years ago- which is kind of inspired from a true life incident (as is all fiction).. Just brought a smile to my face because it's ending is the exact opposite of what I wrote about in my previous post..</i></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i>Reproducing it here, in its unedited and unabridged form, four years after writing it.. :)</i></div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">**********************************************************************************</div><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Remember how we used to have categories of friends when we were younger- general friends, good friends, best friends, bestestest friends.. She wanted to know which category she belonged to. </span><br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Well, if it bothers you so much, just ASK him.. Not a big deal. It’s not like you’re his pesky girlfriend", her mind told her. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">True. But asking a question as silly as "So....where do I stand in your life?" would make her a "typical" female, a tag she had so consciously stayed away from.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">But everything was so unsettling. She wanted to know. Maybe she was a typical.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Penny for your thoughts!", he said, as he sat beside her on the couch, interrupting her thoughts.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Hey! Done with your phone call?"</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Yeah, was a friend from work. So....who you thinking about?", he asked, that familiar twinkle in his eyes.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Huh...no one re. Just watching some TV"</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"The History Channel? Wow...you take TV - watching seriously mate !"</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">With that, they both burst out laughing, as she flipped through the channels. A few minutes passed by in silence- the comfortable kind, not awkward at all..</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Hey, ummmm....you wanna go for a walk or something? If you're not too tired with all the traveling and jet lag, that is.", he asked finally.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">She looked at him, and suddenly everything was so clear. Her mind raced back to 1998- this was exactly how it had started. This very question, that walk, had marked their transition from “general” friends to “bestestest” friends. </div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Of course, nothing had changed.. This time, geographical boundaries and education had come in the way. Soon, there'd be girlfriends and boyfriends, jobs, marriage, kids; but nothing; absolutely nothing could change what they had. Ever. Did she really need to define it? No. Because some things are best left unsaid....</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"What's funny? Why are you smiling?", he asked, as he walked towards the door.</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">"Nothing. I'll just grab a pullover; I think its kinda cold in your London...."</div><div class="MsoNormal" style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal">**********************************************************************************</div><div class="MsoNormal"></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Sometimes Calvin and Hobbes just <i>get you</i>.. :)</span> </div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><a href="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7UKen5d7oVg/Tn7l34iuCaI/AAAAAAAAJUk/Juy_qhBxkBU/s1600/ch870117.gif" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="125" src="http://1.bp.blogspot.com/-7UKen5d7oVg/Tn7l34iuCaI/AAAAAAAAJUk/Juy_qhBxkBU/s400/ch870117.gif" width="400" /> </a></div><div class="MsoNormal"><br />
</div><div class="MsoNormal"><i><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Time: 1:58 AM</span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><i><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">State of Mind: Still Melancholic</span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><i><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;">Song on iPod: Haule haule ho jayega pyaar..</span></i></div><div class="MsoNormal"><span style="font-family: Arial,Helvetica,sans-serif;"><i>Last thought before I crash into bed: I love Taani partner! </i></span></div></div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-11552332.post-84006539847042793752011-09-17T20:09:00.001-04:002011-09-17T20:11:40.056-04:00Why does everyone always wait till 3 ?<div dir="ltr" style="text-align: left;" trbidi="on">Sometimes the Youtube suggested videos come up with real gems- like this short film that popped up after a Grey's Anatomy song (go figure!)...<br />
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<iframe allowfullscreen="" frameborder="0" height="284" src="http://www.youtube.com/embed/-Y4cNnJRRFw" width="500"></iframe><br />
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If you think about it- the story is very standard- a guy with a list of things to do before graduation, his girl - friend (the dash that makes all the difference!) who he also has a crush on, and how he gathers up the courage to tell her his feelings in the end..<br />
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All of us have those lists of things we want to accomplish before graduation or before we turn 25 or 30 or 50, whichever bracket you fall into..<br />
All of us know the feeling of being secretly crazy about someone but not knowing how to say it because you don't want to "ruin the friendship.."<br />
And hopefully some of us have gathered up the courage to tell them how we felt in the hope of leaving nothing unsaid..<br />
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In matters of the heart, more than ever, timing is everything. One missed chance, one wrong move, or a little too much alcohol (;)) can break your shot at the possibility of a great love. The funny thing though, is that you never really know at that point, if it was a good or bad thing. What seems like a lost cause then, could probably be the pathway to something even bigger and better in your future. The dots connect backwards- true. But at the same time, you can connect the dots only if you create them in the first place. Unless you take your chances, how will you know what you could get? <i>Why does everyone always wait till 3?</i> The right moment is <u>now</u>, not when the moon is in its waning crescent phase and stars are forming a heart shape in the sky.. :P<br />
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My second take-home message is this- I sincerely hope that none of you have to experience lost love, because no doubt, it is one of the hardest things you ever have to go through. But if it does come your way- then never go down without a fight. If you wallow in self-pity, then it's like giving the other person the remote control of your life. And <b>that</b> is completely unacceptable. Cry if you want to. But only for fifteen minutes. Love is not a battlefield, but bouncing back is.<br />
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<i>(This post goes out to Aly- This is all I want you to remember, girl..)</i> </div>Unknownnoreply@blogger.com1