The Big Cosmic Question

I've often wondered about this often-discussed concept of fate, destiny, karma etc etc. What exactly is true- Is everything predestined or do we have some amount of control over what happens in our lives? Now I know every human on this planet who has gone through life, has an opinion on this question- and I'd love to hear what you think! That's what the comments section is for! :D But you see, I haven't posted an article on this blog for a year now, so the likelihood of someone reading this post and actually commenting is pretty minuscule.. :P So, for now, I'm going to jot down my two cents on this concept..

Well, for starters, the reason I have always wondered about this issue is because of my mom. You see, she's been through the whole spectrum- from being a die-hard believer in horoscopes, numerology, even tarot, to having mellowed down over the past few years to a more balanced approach towards life. So every time anyone is going through a rough phase, she doesn't shy away from using her experiences to jostle them back to the harsh reality that is life! Of course, I mean this in a good way! :) Secondly, it helps when you have friends who have very interesting takes on the subject too..

So coming back- There was a point in my life when the eternal truth I believed in was that 'good things happen to good people'. And so, be good to all, be honest and sincere and always have integrity (which is the biggest virtue in the world, according to me). Of course, this was a time when the biggest problems in my life were not getting a 90 in English and the guy sitting on the 4th bench in class not smiling at me.. :P Over time, a lot of bigger problems took their place. During such frustrating times, my mom always told me that all things happen for a reason. This may seem like the worst thing that could ever happen to you at that point of time, but this phase is going to make you stronger so that you can deal with worse things when you get older. My mom always visited these funny astrologers, and tried out numerous pujas and stones and everything to try to avert the "bad stuff", but I participated with her only to keep her happy, not because I believed in it. I still do not believe in people who claim to have the powers to predict my future- I do not believe any human being is so gifted. And the amazing thing is that, over the years, my mom stopped believing in such people too! Another thing that changed is that now, I have an opinion on what life is about. I don't say it is universal or that it is true, but it is something that my life has taught me and it is something that helps me live better.

You see, something very interesting happened many years ago. There came a point in my life when I began to act completely out of character. Of course, at that point of time, it seemed perfectly natural and also felt like good-natured rebellion. But when I think of it now, it was so so anti-me! Without getting down to the gory details, lets just say that I was digging a big, huge hole for myself. And I could see that I was digging this hole and knew I should stop. But I just couldn't! The realization of what I had done struck when I was buried so deep that I didn't know how to come back.. It seems so foolish and immature when I think of that time right now, but it was definitely not so funny then. Let's just say that it took me a long time to get out of that sh*t, but I came out of it and washed myself clean.. :P Even today, whenever I think back on what happened, I only wonder what had come over me that made me behave so uncharacteristically! One of the plausible explanations I have is the famous Master Oogway line- "'Often, the steps we take to avoid destiny, lead us to it..'

Yup, regardless of what people may say or think, I do believe that destiny has some role to play in our life. There are some things in our life we have no control over. Incidents happen when you least expect them to, even when you think you've done all the right things! This does not mean you throw your hands in the air and just stroll through life. It is your job to take something away from everything that happens in life- the good and the bad stuff. When something good happens, you appreciate the goodness in life and learn to value what you have. And when things go against your wishes- you learn to deal with it and make the most of it. I am not a religions person, but I do believe in the existence of someone out there who is looking out for me. And I know that he is constantly trying to filter out the bad stuff from my life and that he is going to connect the dots somehow. You remember that crappy situation I mentioned earlier? Well, something good came out of that too. I may have gone through the worst two years of my life, but in the end, I got a chance to mend some very crucial relationships. I got the chance to value what I had been given and I definitely would not have been here today had I not realized this. So you see..it took four years, but the dots connected.

So, where does this leave us with the good = good equation?! You ever heard of the saying 'what goes around, comes around?! Well, it's true !!! So you do good, so that you can build positive relationships in life. When your destiny lands you in a bowl of crap, you are going to need people to help you out of it. And the only way people will respect you, is if you respect them. You do good because you want to do good, not because life is a balance sheet!

What is important is that you push through the bad stuff and believe that some good is about to come. The only thing constant in life is change and so why waste time worrying, right?! Watch reruns of Friends and Scrubs, read books, paint, read this article, reconnect with old friends, travel and take exciting classes- do anything, but push through it! And keep faith in the good things in life- friends who value you no matter what, a family that loves you no matter what, and a purpose in life that keeps you going no matter what.. :)

My mom sent me these lines from a book she reads quite a lot nowadays- The Secret. It is a bit cheesy, but I think this really summarizes a lot of what I've been trying to pen down-

So often, when things change in our lives, we have such a resistance to the change. This is because when people see a big change appearing, they are often fearful that it is something bad. But it is important to remember that when something big changes in our lives, it means something better is coming. There cannot be a vacuum in the Universe, and so as something moves out, something must come in and replace it. When change comes, relax, have total faith, and know that the change is ALL GOOD. Something more magnificent is coming to you!